Learning about love
by RangerCraving
Summary: Sequel to 72 Hours. Babe fic.  Can Ranger & Steph both learn enough about each other, themselves and love to understand and overcome their commitment issues?  Come along with me as R&S try to answer the age old question: Is love really enough?
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Thank you to those of you who sent your wonderful reviews of 72 Hours. It's taken a while to write the sequel that several of you asked for. To be honest, the story did not want to be written. I hope you all enjoy reading it._

_A special thank you for those of you who gave me such good advice, wisdom handholding, support and butt-kicking when I needed it most. Thank you for putting up with my neurosis._

_Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I just borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun. _

_If you have not read 72 Hours, this story will not make sense to you. It is a short story, so please take time to read it before continuing this one. _

_Warning: Smut & Spoilers: All 13_

Learning about love - Prologue

I've been lying here listening to the sounds of the monitors beeping beside my bed for a while now. I can feel the arm that's slung across my body, and I know without opening my eyes by the feeling of security and the fading scent of Bulgari that it's Ranger who's holding me. I wasn't shocked that Ranger had found a way to stay with me, but I was surprised that he'd felt the need to.

I have no recollection of how long I've been here. Memories flash through my mind broken and disjointed with plenty of gaps in between. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be all right, though, as I remember hearing Ranger's laughter as I had drifted in and out of the darkness. Or had it been Tank? I couldn't be sure that the laughter had been a reality or the product of my dreams. I remember talking to Tank, but I'm sure I heard Ranger's voice. Frustrated by the fuzziness, I kept my eyes closed and concentrated.

"I smell something burning, Babe." I shifted my head slightly so that I could look over at Ranger. His eyes were open and alert, watching me.

"Just trying to put the pieces together."

At the twinge of pain in my shoulder I tried shifting slightly. Ranger's arm tightened, tucking me closer to his side. His voice, soft and husky, was close to my ear, "How are you feeling?"

"Okay, I think." The rustiness of my own voice had me grimacing. I tried to clear my throat.

"Do you need anything?"

"Some water." I felt Ranger start to move away from me but my voice stopped him. "Not yet. Can we just lay here for a minute?" Ranger moved back against me and, careful to not jar my body too much, pulled me to his side again.

"Babe." I could hear the concern in his voice, and I felt tears sting the back of my eyes. Afraid that my voice would break, I took a deep breath and blew it out.

"Can you just hold me for a few more minutes?" I don't know why I felt so emotional and needy. I'm not normally a weepy kind of girl. I just knew I couldn't bear to lose the contact with him just yet.

Ranger reached up with his free hand and turned my face so that he could look into my eyes. I don't know what he read there, but I saw his eyes darken. He dipped his head and brushed a gentle kiss against my lips and then tucked my head under his chin.

"How long have I been here?" I whispered.

"Four days." Ranger responded. I thought about that for a minute.

"Have you been here the whole time?" Ranger turned his head and placed a kiss on my hair but didn't answer.

"What do you remember?" I heard something in Ranger's voice that I was too tired to make sense of.

"I think I remember most of what happened. I was shot. How bad is it?"

I felt Ranger's body stiffen slightly. "You're going to be fine. You took one to the shoulder and another that nicked the lung. They had some trouble removing that one because of where it was. The doctor says you should be ready to go home in a few more days and you should make a full recovery."

"I bet my mother's been going crazy fielding phone calls." I don't know why that was my first thought. Childhood conditioning, I guess.

"Your mother's been here every day. She was worried." I knew he was trying to keep me from getting upset about my mother's reaction.

"How about you? Were you worried about me?" I asked in an attempt to lighten his mood.

"I told you before, Babe, I always worry about you." Again there was something in Ranger's voice that I couldn't quite recognize, a strain that wasn't usually there.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Learning about love - Chapter 1

After a week in the hospital I'm no longer surprised waking up with Ranger tucked against me and his arm thrown over my middle, generally with his hand lightly cupping my breast. Normally this would send a rush through me, but right now I had to settle for a tingle. It's hard to feel sexy in a hospital gown. I've seen the look of disapproval from some of the nurses when they come in, but none of them seem to have the courage to tell him he's not allowed to be here.

I adjusted slightly to find a more comfortable position and felt Ranger's arm tuck me closer. "Babe." I closed my eyes and allowed the caress of his voice wash over me.

"Just trying to get comfortable. I'm tired of being in bed." I could hear the petulance in my voice and was annoyed by it.

I felt Ranger's lips against my ear and shivered at his warm breath. "I can distract you, if you'd like." I felt a rush as he gently bit my earlobe and ran his thumb over my nipple.

"Thanks, but I'm not feeling my most glamorous here." Ranger angled his body so that he could look at me.

"You have a point. The hair's looking a little scary, Babe." I went to punch him in the arm and gasped at the twinge that ran through my shoulder. Ranger's face was instantly serious. His eyes watching intently.

"Do you want me to call the nurse in to give you something for the pain?"

"No, thanks. It was just a twinge. Besides, I'm tired of feeling groggy all the time. I just want to go home. The doctor did say I could go home today if I was feeling up to it." I was tired of being in bed. I just wanted to get out of here.

Ranger gave me a dark look. "The doctor said _if _everything checks out when he examines you, and _if_ he could be assured you'd get plenty of bed rest and had someone to help you around the clock for the next several weeks then you could leave today. He didn't make any guarantees."

"I'm ready. I don't want to be here any longer." I could hear the whiny tone of my voice and knew Ranger had too. He had that look that said he was thinking about smiling. Then his eyes went serious again.

"We need to talk. Are you feeling up to that?" I was pretty sure I knew what Ranger wanted to talk about, and I was also sure I wasn't ready for it. I remember telling Tank not to tell Ranger that I was in love with him. Fool, I thought not for the first time, Ranger must have been here the whole time. Well, here it goes. This is the part where Ranger gives me another speech from his '10 Reasons Why Batman Doesn't Do Relationships' list. I wasn't sure if I'd imagined the whole 'I love you in every possible way' thing, but I knew we had to talk about it eventually, and I was thinking I'd need a whole lot of mascara before we had that conversation.

"I'm sort of tired." I could tell by the look on Ranger's face that he wasn't buying it for a moment.

"We're going to have to talk about it eventually, Babe." Ranger's voice made it clear he knew I was being evasive.

"I was thinking later would be good." What I didn't say was that I was thinking _never _would be even better.

Ranger just stared at me for a long minute. "I want you to come back to my apartment when you're released." I felt my heart trip in my chest at his words before he continued.

"Ella is there, so you'd have the best care possible outside of a hospital. Besides, you love my bed. If you're going to be spending so much time in one, you might as well be comfortable." I felt a small ache that the invitation to stay at his place had been for practical purposes.

"What about Rex?" I was trying to act as casual as he had sounded.

"Ella has Rex. As soon as you're settled in she'll bring him up to my place, but she'll still feed him and take care of him until you're on your feet."

"I could probably go back to my place and get my grandma to come stay with me. I wouldn't want to impose on Ella. Or you. I haven't seen Joe, which I have to admit surprises me. I know we've been broken up for a while, but I figured he'd at least stop by to check on me. He must be undercover or else he's just fed up with my disasters. Either way I have a feeling staying with him isn't an option."

I felt Ranger stiffen and his arm tighten around me. "No, staying with Morelli is no longer an option." His voice was tight, and I heard alarms go off in my head. I didn't really want to stay with Joe, had no intentions of staying with Joe even if it was an option. I just hated feeling like I was an inconvenience to Ranger.

"Why are you angry?" Well, duh, Stephanie. You can't tell a man you love him and then suggest staying with your ex-boyfriend. Of course, technically I hadn't told Ranger I love him. I told Tank to tell Ranger I love him. And then I told Tank not to tell Ranger I love him. God, I'm giving myself a headache.

"I said we needed to talk. It would probably be best to wait until we get back to the apartment." I watched as Ranger angled out of the bed, walked into the adjoining bathroom and closed the door. I pushed one of the buttons on the side of the hospital bed and waited impatiently as it motored up to a sitting position.

While I waited for Ranger to reappear I thought about my options. I wanted to ask about Joe and why he hadn't been to see me. I had a feeling Ranger had the answer even if he obviously didn't want to discuss it. I had no intention of staying with Joe, but on the other hand I didn't want to stay in Ranger's apartment surrounded by him when _he was _there and surrounded by the scent of him all around me when _he wasn't_. Now that I had admitted to myself that I was in love with him, even in my current physical condition, it was a small torture to be near him. But that wasn't the biggest problem. I didn't want him to feel obligated to take care of me.

By the time Ranger came back out I was feeling miserable all over. He looked at my face as he walked back to the bed.

"Babe?"

I looked down and focused on the print of the ugly hospital gown I was wearing. I could feel hot tears burning behind my eyes, but I fought them back. With everything else I was feeling, crying in front of Ranger was one more humiliation I just couldn't deal with right now.

"I don't want to be a burden to Ella. Or to you. You've been great spending so much time with me while I've been in here. I know I must have caused you a great deal of worry, but you need to get back to work. You can't keep babysitting me." For a moment the only sound in the room was the constant beep of the monitor next to the bed.

I could sense the intensity of Ranger's eyes on me, but I didn't have the courage to look at him. Finally I felt the bed shift under his weight as he sat next to me. He put his finger gently under my chin and turned my face so that I had no choice but to look at him.

"Stephanie, you sometimes frustrate me and occasionally piss me off. You amuse me, frighten me and cause me untold amounts of worry, but you have _never _been a burden to me, and I've never considered the time I've spent with you babysitting." I looked at the seriousness in his eyes and felt a tear plop out and slide down my cheek. Ranger gently rubbed it away with his thumb.

"Come home with me. Let Ella and me take care of you until you're feeling better." His voice was soft and coaxing.

When I didn't answer immediately he went on, "I want you with me." I could only stare at him. There was a gentleness to him that made my insides quiver. He'd only asked me to stay at his place while I was recuperating, but my instincts were screaming that he was asking me far more than that.

"Okay. Thank you. I'd be happy to stay at your place for a while. I'll try not to be a pain in your ass while I'm there." To my astonishment Ranger's eyes widened slightly and lit with amusement. Then he threw back his head and laughed.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Thank you again to all those who gave me their great advice in the writing of this story. Thank you L&S for your editing and handholding and butt-kicking and encouragement. _

_Disclaimer: I own none of the characters. They belong to the wonderful J.E._

_Warning: Language and Spoilers - All 13_

Learning about love - Chapter 2

_Ranger's POV_

I walked out of the hospital and into the parking lot squinting against the bright sun. I reached into the pocket of my jacket and put on my sunglasses. With Steph being released today there were a few things I wanted to see to before coming back and taking her home.

I wasn't all together surprised to find Morelli leaning against the BMW I'd had Tank drop off for me earlier.

Morelli and I had always managed to avoid a stand off for Stephanie's sake, but I was pretty sure all bets were off now. I wasn't worried about going around with him, but I'd always hoped it wouldn't come to this. He's a good guy, an honorable cop with a thankless job. Plus I owed him for stopping me from killing Tank the night Steph was in surgery. I heard his words again. _"__If she dies, you can kill him. I'll help you dump the body." _When I didn't react, he had continued, his voice finally getting through._ "Steph wouldn't want this."_ The sound of her name seemed to snap me out of it and clear the red haze that had been clouding my vision at the time. And he'd been right. Steph wouldn't have wanted it.

I didn't have any bad feelings toward Morelli, and if truth be told, I kind of figured the guy was just decent enough he deserved to be happy. Unfortunately for him, he was going to have to figure out how to be happy without Stephanie.

I took off my sunglasses and walked up to him; close enough to let him know I was ready for whatever he might have in mind, but not close enough to invade his space. He straightened and met my eye.

We stood, eyes locked for a minute, neither of us talking. Finally he gave a small shake of his head. "I'm not here to fight you. Not that I haven't thought about smashing your face in a couple of times over the last week. Over the last couple of years off and on, for that matter. Just doesn't seem to be much point in it now, other than to make me feel better."

I didn't say anything. I just nodded my head in acknowledgement of his words.

"Christ, you're a real basket case, you know that?" The frustration was evident in Morelli's voice.

"Yeah, I've heard that before." That got a small smile out of him. Morelli had a pretty good cop face. It's almost impossible to get a read on him if he doesn't want you to, but for a moment I could read the naked misery in his eyes and then it was gone.

"I'm not going to ask if you'll protect her. Hell, you've been protecting her pretty much since the day you met her." Again I just nodded and, again, Morelli shook his head. He looked down at his feet for a few seconds and then looked back up at me. His eyes were intense.

"Do you love her?" His question surprised me more than it should have.

Even though I'd already admitted to myself how I felt about Stephanie, I didn't feel it necessary to spill my guts out to Morelli no matter how much I respected him or how bad I felt for him and the situation he was in. I gave him the only answer I could.

"In my own way."

"What the fuck does that mean?" Morelli's outburst caused two nurses crossing the parking lot to look our way.

"It means I'm keeping her, and that's all you need to know." He just glared at me for a second. Finally he looked away, and I could see he was struggling to calm himself down. When he turned back to me he was watching my face intently.

"You killed for her." I knew he wasn't asking. We both knew what had happened with Abruzzi. I didn't respond. I just waited for him to continue.

"You nearly died for her when Scrog was holding her and your daughter." I could tell he was frustrated with my silence but not all together surprised by it.

When he spoke again his voice was intense. "You would have done it for your daughter alone."

"Yes." I wasn't sure where he was going, but I figured he'd take his time getting there. That was fine by me. The more he and I got straightened out now the fewer problems Steph would have with him later. Eventually they'd need to talk, and I didn't want it to be any harder on her than it had to be.

"You would have done it for Steph alone." It wasn't a question, and we both knew it.

I looked at him and said, "You would have done the same thing for her."

Again a small smile hovered around Morelli's mouth. "Maybe. Yeah, I guess I would have, but trust me I would have been looking for a better way."

"There was no other way."

"Not for you. You go walking in there pulling off some superhero shit. How the hell is a man supposed to compete with that?" And now Morelli's voice sounded resigned.

"I'm pretty sure superheroes don't bleed all over the carpet and spend a couple nights in the hospital." That got a grin out of Morelli, but he sobered quickly. There really wasn't anything amusing about the situation we found ourselves in. Finally I decided to give him something back.

"She loves you." I said.

Morelli let out a deep sigh. "I know it. I know. But I saw her the night you were shot when they were bringing you out of her apartment. I'd never seen her like that. She was hysterical. I told her the same thing when I was driving her to the hospital to wait for word about your condition. I've seen her go through a lot of fucked up situations, but I've never seen her that hysterical. I knew then and there, even as I held her, that I'd already lost her. I didn't want to believe it, but I knew." I could tell that Morelli was uncomfortable, and I knew he didn't like spilling his guts any more than I did. I wasn't sure why he was telling me all this, but I figured he had his reasons, so I waited for him to finish.

"I care about her, so I'm going to ask you again. Do you love her?"

I decided it was time to put and end to this conversation. I had things to do before I could come back to pick up Steph, and I realized Morelli wasn't going anywhere until he was satisfied.

"Yes." There was no reaction to my answer.

"Have you told her?" I nodded. I couldn't be sure if she remembered me telling her or not, but in my opinion it didn't matter one way or the other.

"Okay." Morelli started to turn away.

"We didn't tell her you were there to hear what she said. She's wondering why you haven't called or stopped by." Steph hadn't said much about it, but I knew she was upset and confused. I really had no idea how to tell her that Morelli had been in the room when she'd said that she was in love with me. I knew once she found out she'd feel guilty, and I figured she'd been through enough for the moment.

"I couldn't." Morelli answered. "I couldn't stay there, and I haven't been able to make myself go back to see her." I watched as he looked toward the hospital entrance and struggled with himself.

"I'm still not ready, so I'll call her room and tell her what I heard and that I'm happy for her. I'll say I'm going on assignment for a few weeks and that I won't be around. She won't believe me, but I don't think she'll push it. I could use a vacation. Maybe I'll be ready to see her when I get back."

As Morelli turned to leave I told him the only other thing I could. "I'll take care of her."

His response caught me off guard. "I know you will, because if you don't, I'll come looking for you with my gun in my hand, and I'll be leaving my badge at home." The intensity in his eyes as he looked at me told me what I already knew. Morelli was dead serious.

"Understood."

"Stephanie and I have been a part of each other's lives since she was six years old. Did you know that?" Of course I knew, I thought. I knew everything about Steph's past, and Burg gossip didn't carry an expiration date. If you wanted information bad enough you could still find someone who knew the story of how poor Mrs. Plum had to save her daughter Stephanie from that Morelli boy who took her into his father's garage to play choo-choo when she was just six years old.

Before I could answer Morelli went on. "Okay. That was a dumb question. So I'll just get to the point. I'm trying to come to terms with this, and eventually I'd like to think I might be able to get past it and move on. But we've been friends, or something like it, damn near all our lives, and I'm not going to walk away from that easily. Is that going to be a problem for you?"

I looked at Morelli closely and thought about all the times I'd stolen kisses from Steph when he wasn't around, the times I'd slept with her even when nothing had happened. Then I thought about all the nights she'd slept in his bed.

I got right to the point as well. "Can I trust you with her?"

For the first time Morelli's face lit up with a genuine smile. "Nope. Not for a second." He turned and straddled the Duc that was parked next to the BMW, started it up and rode away.

_A/N: Please review one way or the other and let me know if you want me to continue the story._


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: Thank you, everyone, for your wonderful reviews. I'm glad you're enjoying my story. Here are the next two chapters. I hope you like them. I promise to update as often as I can._

_A special thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love - Chapter 3**

_(Two months later)_

I've been staying at Ranger's apartment for almost eight weeks. We still haven't talked about what had been said at the hospital. Ranger's been his normal patient self, keeping his thoughts to himself. However, whenever we're alone I can sense that he's waiting for an opportunity to pounce, like a cat outside of a mouse hole. It's making me a nervous wreck.

We've fallen into a kind of strange routine. Ranger gets up early every morning, leans over and gives me a deep, arousing kiss goodbye and leaves the apartment. Whenever possible, he stops in once or twice during the day to check up on me, and when it isn't possible he makes sure that Ella or one of the guys spend some time with me to keep me company, and he calls when he can. He's allowed my family and friends to visit the apartment and even manages to carry on conversations when he happens to be there.

Ranger always tries to make it home for dinner. We discuss whatever he's been working on during the day as long as it isn't something confidential. He tries to volunteer more about his business dealings that he can talk about, and I try not to nag him about details he can't discuss. After the first week or two, as I started feeling better, he would head back out to work after dinner, always leaving me with a mind-numbing kiss on his way out the door.

Almost every night I'm in bed by the time he comes home, and every night he slips into bed beside me and pulls me close to him. I wake up safe and comfortable in his arms and we start all over again. He never allows himself more than one kiss and then he's gone. Many times I've felt him harden against me, but he'd still get out of bed and go to work. I keep telling myself he's trying to be considerate until I'm feeling better, but I'm becoming so frustrated I'm ready to self-combust.

On the other hand, there's every possibility Ranger's holding back until we have our talk. I knew I couldn't avoid the issue much longer, especially now that I'd just left my doctor's office with a clean bill of health.

I'm not sure why I'm so anxious about talking to Ranger about what was said. I guess a part of me is afraid that I misunderstood when Ranger said he loves me in every possible way, and I hate making a fool of myself. Another part of me is secretly afraid that I didn't misunderstand, and I'm not sure where we go from here. Let's face it, there's a lot about Ranger that I don't know, and I'm not sure what having a relationship with him is going to mean.

So here I am with a clean bill of health and left without any excuse to continue avoiding the big talk. My anxiety was mixed with pure joy. I'd been going crazy for the last two weeks doing nothing more strenuous than computer searches in the apartment on the lap top Ranger had Tank bring up for me. He only agreed to that after talking to my doctor personally and even then Ranger made sure I limited myself to a couple hours a day. We'd had more than one argument the last few weeks about my boredom. Well, actually I had argued. Ranger would sit and watch me rant and rave until I would finally wind down and then calmly tell me to deal with it until the doctor said otherwise and he'd consider the subject closed. I threatened to leave one time, but he just gave me a dark look and told me to try it.

I could tell I was finally getting to him, though. At first he'd come home early every night, but the more restless I became, the later he'd come home. I couldn't really blame him. I'd become so annoying I was pissing myself off. It's a wonder Ranger hadn't sent me packing weeks ago.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

It was late afternoon when I came out of the doctor's office. Hal was waiting for me in one of the shiny black SUV's that Ranger seemed to have an endless supply of. Ranger hadn't even allowed me to start driving myself yet. This overprotective side of Ranger wasn't completely new, but it was still a bit disconcerting, and I wasn't really sure if I liked it or not. On the one hand it made me feel warm and secure and safe. On the other hand it made me feel useless and bored and pissy.

I climbed into the truck and clicked my seatbelt on. "What did the doctor say?" Hal asked.

"What? You mean Ranger hasn't already called you with a full report? I'm sure the doctor ran to call him as soon as I walked out of his office." I was being sarcastic, but the red that washed into Hal's face told me the truth.

"You are kidding me. Ranger already called you?"

"Well, um, he just wanted to let me know that even though the doc's cleared you he wants you to come back to Rangeman first before you go running off getting into --" Hal quit talking as he realized what he almost said.

"Before I go running off and getting into what, exactly?" Hal's not the brightest penny in the jar, but he was smart enough to recognize a pissed off woman.

"Ah, he didn't mean nothing by it. He just wants to see you is all." I rolled by eyes and turned and looked out the window.

"Fine. Take me to Rangeman." I crossed my arms over my chest and thought about this situation with Ranger and me. Something had to change, and fast. I wasn't sure what I was going to do when I got back to the apartment, but I was pretty sure I was either going to pack and move out or tell Ranger I love him. Either option made me feel nauseous.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX 

I walked out of the elevator on the fifth floor of Rangeman, Hal at my side. We hadn't said anymore on the way back. I was thinking about my upcoming conversation with Ranger, and god only knows what Hal was thinking about.

Tank was in the comp area on the phone when we walked in. He'd been uncomfortable around me for the first week or so after I'd been released from the hospital. I'd finally nagged Ranger about it until he told me that Tank blamed himself for my getting shot. The next day I insisted that Ranger assign Tank to "don't let Steph get out of bed and keep her company" duty so I could talk to him.

I could tell when Tank walked into the room that he wasn't happy about being there. After an hour of me thanking him for saving my life and apologizing over and over to the point of groveling for not doing as he'd told me and staying put, which ultimately led to my being shot in the first place, he was finally convinced that I didn't blame him and agreed that he'd done what he could to keep me safe. Since then he'd voluntarily come up to the apartment at least two or three times a week to spend several hours playing the video games with me that Bobby had brought up and plugged in for the days when he was taking his turn babysitting me.

When Tank got off the phone I walked directly over to where he was manning the monitors. "Hey, Steph. Glad to hear you're cleared to rock and roll." So, I thought, Tank already knew too.

"Where's Ranger?" At the tone of my voice Tank's eyebrows went up and he looked at Hal.

"Ranger's in his office catching up on some paperwork. He said to tell you to go on up to the apartment and he'd be up to talk to you later."

"He'll talk to me now." I turned and stomped off toward Ranger's office. I turned around quickly and glared at Tank.

"And don't you dare beep him or whatever the hell it is you do to warn him I'm coming."

I didn't bother knocking on the door; I just turned the knob and flung it open. Ranger looked up from the desk when the door hit the wall. It was just a flash, but I saw something in his eyes before they went carefully blank again. I wasn't sure if it was a flash of surprise or annoyance.

"Babe."

"We need to talk." I didn't bother keeping the anger out of my voice. There was again a flash in Ranger's eyes that was quickly masked. I told myself there was no point in being nervous. After all, Ranger hadn't gone through so much time and trouble to get me healthy to turn around and throw me out a window now. At least I didn't think he would.

"Didn't Tank give you my message?" There were times when this completely cool and controlled side of Ranger made me want to scream.

"Yes, Tank told me you would be up to talk to me later. Later doesn't work for me, Ranger. We need to talk now."

Ranger didn't say anything for a minute, just watched me intently. "Fine. Close the door."

"Oh, you want me to close the door? Every man out there knew the results of my doctor's appointment before I'd even left the doctor's office, but now you want privacy?" I'd rarely raised my voice to Ranger, and if I wasn't coming off of a week in the hospital and eight weeks locked in Ranger's apartment, I wouldn't have found the courage to do it now either. Okay, so I wasn't actually locked in Ranger's apartment. And, fine, he'd taken me out to dinner once or twice and dropped me off at my parents' house a couple of times. And, yes, he did let me go sit and talk with Connie and Lula a few days ago at the office, but still he made sure I had someone watching me the whole time so I wouldn't overdo. And besides I wasn't in the mood to be fair or reasonable.

I started to rethink the whole pissed off woman approach as I watched Ranger slowly unfold himself from the desk chair and stalk toward me. I started to take a step back and stopped myself. Ranger would not hurt me. Ranger would not hurt me. I kept repeating this in my head over and over as I stood my ground.

I held my breath as Ranger stopped directly in front of me. He was so close I had to tilt my head back to meet his eyes. We both stood there for a few seconds. I barely stifled a gasp as his hand came up quickly. I watched the corners of his mouth tip up in a barely-there smile as he reached behind me and softly closed the door. I heard the lock tumble over the pounding of my heart.

As Ranger moved in, brushing against me, I took one step back and then another and another until I was trapped between the door and Ranger's hard body. He brushed my hair out of the way and leaned down to nibble on my neck. I closed my eyes. The close daily contact with Ranger over the last two months had left my body in a constant state of need. When his tongue traced my ear, I felt my nipples harden and heat fill my body and head south. I was fighting to concentrate when I felt Ranger's lips against my ear.

"What did you want to talk about, Babe?"

"Um -- Ah --" Feeling Ranger's body shaking with silent laughter snapped me out of it.

"You are such a jerk." I put my hands up between us to give myself some room. When Ranger refused to budge, I gave up and did what I'd wanted to do for weeks. I slid my hand down his chest, across his stomach and over the front of his cargo pants. As I cupped his hardness in my hand I felt his body involuntarily thrust against my palm. Squeezing him gently, sliding my fingers up and down the length of him I decided I didn't really want to talk after all. I couldn't even remember what I was mad about to begin with. All I could think about was getting this wonderful, huge thing inside of me. I'd worry about relationships later. Maybe. Who wanted a relationship anyway? I mean it's not like any of mine had ever worked out. Orgasms, however, were much less complicated if they're done right, and I knew from personal experience Ranger does orgasms perfect. Over and over again.

Finally, I thought, just before I felt him shift and pull back from me. For a minute I thought he was going to be helpful and start stripping down himself. I looked at Ranger. He looked like a man who was struggling with something. He held my eyes for a few minutes in silence before turning and walking back over behind his desk. I couldn't believe this. I wanted to rage against the unfairness of it.

"What the hell was that?" My voice sounded breathless and high pitched to my own ears.

"Now's not the time, Babe." I might be confused about Ranger's behavior, but the gruffness of his voice told me what I already knew. Ranger was a man fighting the demands of his own body. What I didn't know was why he felt he needed to. He knew that Morelli and I were finished. Had been since before I'd been shot. I had confirmed with Tank during one of our fierce video battles that Ranger _had _heard me confess that I was in love with him and that Ranger _had _also told me he loved me, so I knew it wasn't a dream or just the drugs. That's all Tank would say, though. He said it was between Ranger and me, and then he clammed up.

"When would be a good time, Ranger? Would tonight work for you? Or maybe tomorrow? How about I just go on upstairs and pack, and you can drop by my place one night when you have time for me." I heard my voice catch, and I started to turn around. I was not going to cry in front of Ranger. I didn't even know why I felt like crying. My hormones were going berserk. I was bored and restless and confused. And it was all Ranger's fault. I was absolutely positive that if he hadn't stopped and walked away I'd be done with Orgasm Number 1 by now and working my way quickly toward Orgasm Number 2 which would fix the hormones, the boredom and the restlessness. To hell with the confusion. I spend half my life in a state of confusion anyway.

"Steph, wait." I stopped with my hand on the lock and waited.

"We need to talk about where we go from here." Ranger's voice had lost the edge, and he was once again sounding in control of himself.

Fighting to match his calm, I turned back to face him. Without meaning to do it, with no knowledge of what was about to come out of my mouth, I heard myself ask him, "Why don't you want me anymore?" The shock on Ranger's face mirrored my own.

I was horrified at what I'd said. "I'm sorry. I don't know where that came from. Don't answer that." I was stammering and stuttering and I couldn't seem to shut up.

Looking at me like I was crazy, Ranger just stared at me. Finally after what seemed like a lifetime he seemed to find his voice. "Stephanie, I would say just a few minutes ago you were holding proof in your own hands that I very much still want you." Ranger's voice sounded incredulous.

"Then I don't understand." My response was whisper soft and held an insecurity that I didn't often feel or show. I knew I should have used more mascara this morning.

"This isn't the place, not with all the guys down the hall. Anyone could walk by or knock on the door at any moment. Will you go upstairs and wait for me? I promise I'll only be a few minutes." I felt a tear plop out and slide down my cheek, and I could barely swallow around the lump in my throat so I just nodded my head to let him know that I understood. Everything that had happened the last two months and Ranger's assurance that he still wanted me seemed to cause a flood of emotion to slam into me, making me want to sit on the floor and cry.

Tears were swimming in my eyes making it difficult for me to see, but I felt Ranger come over and gently take me into his arms.

"Babe, it never occurred to me you'd think I didn't want you. I always want you." I buried my face against Ranger's chest and wrapped my arms around his neck.

A minute or so passed as Ranger held me and I got myself under control. I don't know why it is that just being in Ranger's arms calms me more than anything I've ever known. I felt a peace settle in my heart, and I knew I was exactly where I'd always belonged, and I also knew it was time.

Keeping my face averted from Ranger, I lifted up on my toes and put my lips next to his ear.

"I love you." I felt his body jerk and then freeze. The next thing I knew I was lifted off my feet in a surprisingly quick move. I had a split second to see the 200-watt smile on Ranger's face before his mouth slammed down on mine. The kiss was deep and hungry and urgent and too soon it gentled and slowed.

Still holding me in his arms Ranger lifted his head slightly and looked deep into my eyes, "It took you long enough," he said against my mouth. Before I could react, he lifted his head. His gaze went around the office.

"You picked a fine time to tell me, Babe." It took a minute for his words to register and then I started squirming and demanding to be put down.

Once my feet were on the ground I punched Ranger in the stomach. I tried not to grimace at the pain that shot up my arm. The laughter in Ranger's eyes had me narrowing my own. "What kind of remark is that? I tell you I love you and you complain about my timing? Fine. If that's all you've got to say, I'm outta here."

I turned to stomp to the door when I felt Ranger's hand settle around my neck as he gently pulled me back against his body. "We really need to find a cure for all of this pent up rage you seem to be carrying around these days, Babe." I could hear the smile in his voice, and I was pretty sure I knew which cure he was thinking of.

Just as I was about to make some remark about no longer being in the mood I felt Ranger's lips settle against my ear once again.

"I love you too, Babe." I stood perfectly still and my heart fell out onto the floor at Ranger's feet. So, I thought, this is what love feels like. And then I realized something. When you really love someone and it's right, it's not hard to say the words at all.

I was just turning to face Ranger again when there was a knock on the door.


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: Thank you, everyone, for your wonderful reviews. I'm glad you're enjoying my story. Here are the next two chapters. I hope you like them. I promise to update as often as I can._

_A special thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 4**

I entered Ranger's apartment with Connie and Lula hot on my heels. The sudden shift in gears from my conversation with Ranger to the yammering of Lula had my head spinning. My body still felt like live wires were shimmering under my skin. I wanted to hurry them out the door, and go back down to Ranger's office to pick up where we left off.

"Hey, girlfriend, we didn't interrupt anything, did we?" Connie looked over at Lula and they both started laughing.

I could feel my face get warm. "What makes you think that?"

"Oh, I don't know. The pissed off, frustrated look on your face maybe," Connie said.

"Or that great big bulge in the front of Ranger's pants maybe," Lula said, causing Connie to snicker.

"Or the fact that your nipples --"

"Enough. I get the point." This sent both women off into gales of laughter. I, however, was not amused.

"I'd say there were lots of pointy objects in that room, girlfriend. Damn near put my eye out just walking in." Connie snorted at Lula's comment. I got up and started pacing around the room.

"I'm glad my sexual frustration is such an amusement to my friends," I said, stopping to pin them both with a glare.

Lula laughed, "Come on, girl, you've been living with Batman for eight weeks. Surely you can take time out from playing with the man long enough to visit with your girls. Besides, once you're back to work, Connie and I won't be asked back to this cool ass building to visit anymore."

"Ah, actually, Ranger and I haven't -- We haven't. You know." I stopped mid-sentence. I was trying to think of a time when I had felt more mortified. The only times I could come up with was when I'd caught Dickie banging Joyce Barnhardt on our dining room table and the time I'd called Ranger to come and save me when Joe had handcuffed me naked to my shower rod.

Connie took a deep breath. "Wait a minute. Wait just a minute. Are you telling me you and Ranger haven't been -- haven't -- That's impossible." I could feel my face get hot as both women went silent and stared at me like I'd grown another head.

"How is that possible?" Connie sounded as stunned as Lula looked.

"What the hell?" Lula hissed out. "Girl, you mean to tell me you've been sleeping in that there bed with that hunk of hot man and you ain't had sex with him? What the Sam Hill is wrong with you?"

"Lula," Connie hissed back, "maybe it's him." I hated the sympathetic look on Connie's face more than the shocked one on Lula's.

"But that doesn't make sense. We all know how he feels about you. That man's eyes strip you down and take you every time you walk into a room, and you're telling me he hasn't touched you while you've been in his bed?" I wasn't offended at Lula's choice of words. I felt like storming back into Ranger's office and throwing him on the desk and taking him, willing or not.

Feeling miserable I just shook my head.

"Huh."

"I'm confused. Then what was that we interrupted downstairs," Connie asked.

"I'd just told him I loved him, and we were going to come up here and talk." At my words Connie and Lula exchanged a look.

"What?"

"Wellll, sometimes those words can take the starch right out of a man's pecker, if you know what I mean."

Connie gave Lula a look of disbelief. "Lula, you just admitted you saw the condition Ranger was in when we walked in on them. I'd say Ranger's pecker had plenty of starch in it."

Turning to look at me, Connie softened her voice. "What did Ranger say when you told him you love him?"

"He smiled and said he loved me too. After he complained about my timing." I walked over and sat on the other end of the couch.

"Huh." Lula seemed to be thinking.

"Steph, that's great. Wow, I can't imagine Ranger admitting that he loves a woman." Connie stopped and seemed to be trying to do just that.

"I just don't get it. He kisses me every chance he gets, and I've felt his body respond, but he pulls back and doesn't do anything about it." I couldn't keep the worry out of my voice.

"He says he still wants me. I just don't understand why he hasn't done anything."

"What have you done about it?" At Lula's question I went blank.

"What?"

"Have you tried jumping him?" I just stared at her.

"Yeah, maybe he's just trying to be considerate since you were hurt." Lula looked at Connie like she was dim. Apparently she didn't think Batman could be considerate.

"I can't just jump Ranger." My brain seemed to be sluggish as I considered Lula's questions.

"Why the hell not," Lula asked.

"Yeah, why the hell not," Connie echoed.

"Because -- Because I can't," I managed to stammer out over the shock. Both women looked completely serious.

"Can I?" I looked at them both. Normally I'm not much for discussing my sex life, but I was a desperate woman.

"Of course you can. You just wait 'til morning, rub up against him a little bit, then while he's still sleeping but his pecker's waking up, you just hop right on and ride it. By the time the big boy himself wakes up, it'll be too late for him to stop it."

"Lula," Connie gasped out a laugh. "Steph, honey, why don't you just wait here on the couch naked for him when you know he's coming home. Trust me, you won't need to do anything else."

"Huh. And I say she should just jump him." Lula was getting herself all worked up.

"Stephanie doesn't need to jump him. She can be subtler than that. Can't you tell she's too shy to just jump Ranger?"

"How subtle is lying her naked ass down on his couch? And what if my man comes up to the apartment with Ranger for something? How's she gonna feel if Ranger ain't alone and she's laying there all naked?" I looked at Lula, horrified by the image.

"I'm just saying she doesn't have to wait until morning and plan a sneak attack. Besides what if he wakes up first? Huh? What then?" Connie was now on her feet leaning forward toward Lula, her voice raised.

"Look, if Steph needs advice on typing and filing her nails, then she should ask you. I'm the ex ho here, and if she needs advice on getting Batman into bed, I say she should listen to me." Lula stood up too. Her voice had risen right along with Connie's, and her arms were flailing around.

"Huh," Connie huffed out.

"Huh yourself," Lula responded, both women nose to nose.

I sat there staring at the two of them, feeling kind of dizzy, and nearly shrieked at the voice coming from the doorway.

"Ladies, am I interrupting anything?" Connie and Lula dove apart and spun around to look at Ranger leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Holy shit," I heard Lula whisper. Ranger's face showed no expression, but he raised an eyebrow at Lula's comment.

"Ah, we were just leaving. Nice seeing you, Steph. Glad you're feeling better. We'll see you at the office tomorrow, right? Bye, Ranger." Connie was dragging Lula toward the door. As they passed Ranger he just nodded at them. When the door had closed behind them, Ranger slowly turned and pinned me with his eyes.

"Chatting with the girls, Babe? Did you really think you needed their advice on how to get me into bed?" I could feel waves of emotion radiating off of Ranger. Unfortunately, through my embarrassment, I couldn't pinpoint what emotion I was dealing with. I wasn't really nervous, but I felt like a thousand butterflies had been let loose in my stomach.


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: Thank you again, everyone, for your wonderful reviews. I'm glad you're enjoying my story. I apologize to those of you to whom I haven't sent a private response to their review. I promise to find time between chapters to get to you. Here's the next chapter. It's my first shot at smut, so I hope you're not disappointed.._

_A special thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_Jaime, not nearly as hot as yours, but I hope you enjoy!_

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

Learning about love – Chapter 5

_"Chatting with the girls, Babe? Did you really think you needed their advice on how to get me into bed?" I could feel waves of emotion radiating off of Ranger. Unfortunately, through my embarrassment, I couldn't pinpoint what emotion I was dealing with. I wasn't really nervous, but I felt like a thousand butterflies had been let loose in my stomach._

_XXXXXXXXXXXXX_

I was horrified as I watched Ranger come into the room. He stopped and looked at me for a long moment, his eyes dark and intense. He was looking at me in a way that made my hands want to tremble. I was about to break the silence when he spoke.

"So, exactly what advice did they have for you, Babe?" Ranger's voice was quiet. I couldn't tell if he was angry or amused, but I silently thanked god that he obviously hadn't heard all of the conversation between Lula and Connie and me.

"Ah, we hadn't actually gotten to anything specific." Okay, so I'm a big fat liar. I can live with that.

Ranger just stared at me for a long moment. "Too bad. Might have been interesting." I wasn't sure, but I had the feeling he was toying with me.

Suddenly the idea of talking about our relationship was a lot less scary than talking to Ranger about Connie and Lula's advice about sex. Denial being my best friend, I decided the safest thing to do was to change the subject.

"Are we going to talk now?" I watched as his eyes darkened to deep black pools.

Ranger slowly shook his head. I wasn't able to hide my disappointment. Either Ranger was angry about me discussing our sex life with Connie and Lula, or he'd changed his mind and decided to avoid talking about our relationship once again.

Reading my face perfectly, Ranger walked over to me. He reached down and pulled me to my feet and then framed my face with his hands. "Our talk is going to have to wait." Ranger gently tucked a stray curl behind my ear.

"I want to hear you say it while I'm looking at you, Babe."

"W-w-what?" I felt like I was getting mixed signals, and suddenly I wasn't sure what Ranger wanted from me.

As Ranger brought his mouth slowly down to mine and kissed me, I completely forgot about Connie and Lula. He pulled back, keeping his eyes on mine.

"Will you tell me again, Steph?" And suddenly I understood. My nerves were alive and jumping inside of me. I felt like I was at the edge of a cliff ready to jump. The thing is, after taking a deep breath, I realized that Ranger would always be there to catch me. Ranger is the man who protects me.

"I love you." I saw in his eyes the pleasure my words gave him, and my heart gave a little leap.

"I love you too, mi amor. My love." He said, while looking deep into my eyes. Then I saw nothing as his mouth closed over mine, taking me under with a hot, soul-searing kiss. I could feel Ranger's control slipping as he roughly grabbed my hips and pulled me against him, molding my body to his. Startled by the sudden movement, overwhelmed by the urgency of Ranger's hard arousal pressing firmly against my hot center, I gasped.

Instantly I was released and Ranger stepped back. Once again I had to fight the urge to scream at him. Taking deep breaths I simply looked at him.

"Why?" I reached out a hand to touch him, but he gently took it and brought it to his mouth kissing my knuckles then turning it over to place a wet kiss in my palm. Nearly trembling with desire I searched his face again.

Ranger looked at me for a long moment, and I wasn't sure he was going to answer. Finally he said, "I've been keeping myself on a tight leash around you for a long time. I can't promise to be gentle, Babe."

I felt hot and cold all over. All I could think about was a Ranger-induced orgasm. I felt as if the tiniest touch, the barest whisper of his hard body against mine again would send me plunging over the edge. "I don't need you to be gentle. I don't _want_ you to be gentle." I barely recognized my own voice.

I felt a shudder run through my body as Ranger's eyes went black and a small feral smile tipped up the corners of his mouth.

Ranger used the hand he still held captive to tug me off balance until I slammed into his chest. "In that case, are you ready, Steph?" His voice was low and harsh doing nothing to hide his arousal. All I could think was, _'__Are you freaking nuts? Of course I'm ready.'_

Misunderstanding my silence, Ranger brushed my hair back and nuzzled my ear. "It's going to be all right, Babe. Trust me." Ranger sounded as if he was trying to sooth me, but I didn't need soothed. This was Ranger, and he would never hurt me; with him I'd always be safe.

I slid my fingers into his hair and brought Ranger's head up so I could look into his eyes. "Yes, Ranger, I trust you. I'm ready." I watched as victory flashed in his eyes along with something hot and almost frightening.

"It's Carlos, Babe. I want to hear you say my name." Before I even had a chance to answer, Ranger swept me off my feet and into his arms, his mouth crushing down on mine.

"Say it." Teeth clenched, Ranger's growl grated over my skin, rough and arousing.

"Carlos. I'm ready, Carlos."

I felt myself tremble as Ranger carried me to the bedroom and laid me on the bed, and I knew by the fierce smile on his face that he'd felt it too. The next thing I knew he was leaning over me, and I was roughly pulled up by the shoulders as Ranger's mouth slammed down on mine. The barely suppressed violence of the kiss had me bending backwards. He tangled his hand in my hair to stop my retreat. Ranger pulled back and I could see that his eyes were dilated to deep black pools. I could hear my breath coming in short erratic pants. Somewhere deep inside me I heard a voice. Instead of it telling me to run from this new and exciting Carlos, it was saying, yes, yes, oh, please, yes.

And suddenly I could see and hear nothing as Ranger climbed onto the bed and angled his mouth over mine again and again. With a will of their own my arms reached out to him and pulled him to me. I heard a ripping sound and dimly realized that my shirt was gone. And then Ranger's mouth was on my nipple, nipping at it through my bra. Just as quickly my bra followed my shirt, and there was nothing separating his hot demanding mouth from my skin. I arched off the bed and moaned. When he started to lift his head, I grabbed his silky black hair and tugged him back to me, lifting myself to his lips.

Ranger angled his head to look at me, a small smile playing around his mouth. He kept his eyes on mine as he gave me what my body was asking for, pulling my hardened nipple into his mouth, sucking with enough force to have me bucking against him. At the sound of the moan that tore from my throat he dragged my pants down my legs and tossed them to the floor.

Ranger moved over me in a quick move, using his knees to force my thighs apart, his arms on either side of me as he held himself above me. I felt the hard length of his shaft as he rocked teasingly against the wetness between my legs. I closed my eyes and concentrated on the electric-like sensations that ran through my entire body.

I felt Ranger pull back, and I opened my eyes. He waited until I was able to focus on his face. His voice, rough with restrained desire, Ranger looked into my eyes. "Tell me this is what you want."

"Yes."

"Say it. Tell me you want me." The demand in his voice cut through the fog covering my brain.

Holding his eyes with my own, I gave what he demanded. "I want you."

"Tell me you love me." By now I was nearly shaking with desire, my body screaming for release.

"I love you. Please, Carlos, I love you." Too far gone to be ashamed of begging, I wrapped one hand around the back of his neck and attempted to pull him down to me.

My words spurred something in Ranger that hadn't been there the first time we had been together. Gone was the controlled Ranger I was so used to dealing with. It was as if something inside him snapped. I barely had time to register that he had torn my panties off when I felt his fingers thrust into me and his mouth capture my nipple in a hard tugging motion that I felt clear to my womb.

The violence of his need coupled with my own left me no room for uncertainty or shyness. We were two people desperate to find release from a frustration that had been building for months. No one and nothing else mattered. Suddenly I was catapulted over the edge, the violence of my release gushing hot and wet over his fingers. Moaning low in his throat, Ranger captured my scream with a kiss. Before I had time to come down from the intensity of the first orgasm, Ranger plunged into me hard and deep, immediately spiraling me into another.

This time Ranger didn't bother muffling my scream. "Yes, scream for me," he demanded. Quickening his long deep strokes in and out of me, he fed off the sound, letting it drive him to his own release. As he buried himself inside me one last time, he threw back his head and groaned out my name. Feeling Ranger explode deep and hot inside of me, I closed my eyes and once again came apart.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

The first thing I became aware of was Ranger's fingers tracing a small circular motion on my back. I had no memory of how we had ended up with me laying on top of him. The cool air felt delicious against my heated skin. As I rested my head on Ranger's chest, he brushed my dampened hair back from my face, and I felt him place a kiss on my forehead. I tried to shift off of him, but he tightened his hold on me.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I don't want to crush you." My voice was uncharacteristically husky.

"You're not going anywhere, Babe. We're not finished."

Ranger didn't move. He waited until I had lifted my head and looked at him. The intensity in his eyes made my breath hitch and my heart start tap-dancing in my chest.

"We're not?"

"Not even close." Ranger pulled me up his body until my mouth was even with his. He began a tender assault on my senses. His mouth whispered across mine. Where the first kiss had been hot, a little scary and on the edge of violence, this kiss was a request, a promise, a gentle demand.

As Ranger once again rolled me to my back his hands were slow and seeking instead of demanding and punishing. His eyes as they watched me gave little of what he was feeling away, but even with his gentleness I could sense an edge to him, as if he were holding himself back. Still, as he proceeded to kiss my mouth, the side of my neck, my collarbone, my nipples, working his way down my body, I sensed that he was trying his best to be gentle.

Finally I felt Ranger's mouth cover me, hot and wet. His tongue began an exquisite torture as he used his lips and teeth to tug at the hard nub he had exposed, alternately sucking and licking me. Minutes later my body was rocked with another shattering orgasm. As I had before, I screamed his name and felt his composure snap. Once again Ranger entered me hard and swift, destroying me body and soul. Denying himself nothing, taking whatever he wanted, Ranger demanded that I stay with him every step of the way.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews, and I apologize for not responding individually to thank you. I promise to try to do better._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking. __A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate for taking time on her day off to help me. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

_Because I haven't updated for several days, I'm posting five new chapters this time around. For those of you who signed up for an alert, I apologize for the five e-mails I'm sure you got. I promise this will be the only time I post five at once. I hope you all enjoy them. Please take time to let me know what you think._

_WARNING: I apologize ahead of time to any fans of Stephanie's mother, Ellen Plum. You may not like my interpretation of her in this chapter._

Learning about love – Chapter 6

Wrapped in Ranger's arms I listened as his breathing evened out and the pounding of his heart under my ear slowed to a normal rhythm. I thought about how this man could make me feel as no other ever had.

I lost track of how much time had passed. This wasn't the first time I'd lain in Ranger's arms in his bed, but how different it was now curled up against him with his arm around me. Wow, I thought, I'm laying here snuggling with Batman. How cool is that? And how scary. 'Yeah, but now what,' a little voice said inside. I was so caught up in my own thoughts, my body so relaxed, that I jumped at Ranger's rumbling voice.

"You okay, Babe?"

"Mmmm." I could almost feel Ranger's smile as he placed a kiss on my forehead.

"I meant for us to talk before we got here," Ranger said. When I didn't answer, he went on.

"We need to talk, Steph. If not now, soon. I want to know what you need from this relationship, from me. I need to know if marriage is the only thing you'll accept from me, if marriage is what you need to make you happy."

I could feel Ranger waiting for me to say something, and I knew that he'd let it go for now if I asked him to. I laid there silently wishing I could get up and put on some mascara first. Gallons of mascara.

Taking courage in Ranger's arms holding me and the fact that he couldn't see my face as I rested my cheek on his chest, I quietly started trying to explain all the doubts and fears I had kept locked inside.

"When I was growing up, Val was the good daughter, and I was the problem child. I guess you've already figured that out. Val played with dolls, and I jumped off roofs and played choo-choo with _one of those Morelli boys_. Val got good grades, and I barely got by. How I made it through college I'll never know. Val would sit home at night doing homework and primping in the mirror, and I would sneak out the window and go looking for trouble with Mary Lou. Val went to her marriage bed at 19 as pure as the day she was born, and I lost my virginity at 16 to Joe behind the counter at the Tasty Pastry." It didn't feel awkward telling Ranger what I figured he already knew, and he didn't say anything to interrupt me.

"I can remember hearing my parents arguing at night. My mother would be complaining to my father about whatever latest stunt I had pulled. He would tell her that I was spirited, and she would say I was wild. I can't tell you how many times I'd hear her tell people that I was her _difficult child_. I can remember her saying it over and over throughout my life like she was apologizing for handing a guest a cracked piece of china. '_I'm sorry. She's always been a difficult child. I'm sorry. That's the plate Stephanie dropped on the floor. I'd throw it away but it's part of a set, and it just wouldn't seem right. She's such a difficult child.' _You get the point." I stopped long enough to take a deep breath.

Ranger tilted my face up and brushed away the tear that was sliding down my cheek. I could see the emotion swimming in his eyes; sympathy mixed with what looked like anger, but there was nothing angry about the way he gently tucked my hair back behind my ear.

"It's all right, Babe. You don't have to tell me any more. I didn't mean for this to hurt you." The gentleness of Ranger's voice had me fighting back even more tears. I hate crying in front of Ranger.

"It's okay." I said softly. "I'm almost done, and I'd like to finish now that I've started." His eyes searched my face a moment longer and then he guided my head back so that it rested on his chest, tucked under his chin. I took comfort in his hand gently stroking my hair.

"The day I told my mom that Dickie had proposed you would have thought she'd won the lottery. She acted like she thought no one would ever want me. I remember she all but ran to the phone and called one of her friends. I don't remember which one, and I guess it doesn't really matter anyhow." I spent another minute trying to remember. Finally giving up, I continued.

"Anyway, I couldn't wait to tell my mom. I didn't know that Dickie was such an asshole at the time. I was pretty happy, knowing I was finally going to get her approval. And here she is on the phone, _'Oh my god, you're not going to believe this. Stephanie's getting married. I can't believe it. Can you believe it?' _I don't know if she knew I could hear her or not. I guess that doesn't really matter either." I felt Ranger gently pull me in closer in an attempt to offer me comfort.

"I remember there was this pause, and then her head poked around the corner. She had her hand over the phone so whoever she was talking to couldn't hear her. She looked at me and she said, _'You're not pregnant, are you? Stephanie, please tell me you're not pregnant.' _I couldn't believe what was happening. She hadn't even congratulated me or asked to see the ring. Just the phone call and tell me you're not pregnant. I knew I couldn't speak, so I just shook my head. I heard her telling whoever it was, _'No, she's not pregnant; he actually wants to marry her.' _That's the last thing I heard as I was walking out the door." This time I reached up and dashed the tear off my cheek myself.

I sat up, hating to lose the contact, but needing a little distance. I leaned back against the headboard as Ranger shifted toward me, but I still didn't look at him. Instead I locked my gaze on our entwined fingers as he reached over and held my hand. I concentrated on the darkness of his skin against the paleness of mine.

"She took me shopping and arranged the wedding. She did most of the work herself. She took care of the caterers, the music, the reception hall and, of course, the food. She made out the guest list and helped pick the flowers and the cake. I barely had to do anything but show up." I blew out a sigh.

"That makes me sound ungrateful, and I don't mean to be. I know she loves me, and she was happy for me." Now I looked at Ranger. He didn't look angry now. He didn't look anything. Ranger was in his lock down mode.

"When I came home shortly after the wedding and found Dickie going at it with Joyce on the dining room table, I was crushed. I didn't know where to go or what to do. Mary Lou had just had a baby, so I couldn't go to her. I made the mistake of going to my mother. I can't say I was surprised when she started in about how a husband wants a wife at home. '_You were always my difficult child. Why are you doing this to me? What will everyone say? Why do you have to work? He's an attorney. You don't need to work. Stay at home and make him a pot roast. Tell him you want a baby. Val stays at home cooking and cleaning and her husband doesn't cheat on her.'_" My rambling came to a stop as I choked on a small sob. The sob surprised me. I hadn't realized how hurt I still was after all this time.

Instantly Ranger sat up against the top of the bed. I was pulled onto his lap and wrapped in his arms. When I looked at him this time his mask was gone and he was hiding nothing. What I saw in his eyes was more than anger. This was fury. Instead of being frightened by it, it made me feel stronger and helped stop the tears.

"Don't be angry with her. She's never known any other way of life but that of being a wife and mother. She didn't know how to raise a child like me. She never understood me. How could she when I never understood myself?"

I watched as he tried to bank the fury, but I could still hear it in his voice when he spoke. "I bet she felt like a fool when she found out Valerie's husband ran off with the babysitter."

"That was years later, but I kept waiting for her to say something to me. I didn't really expect her to apologize, but I thought she might say something. She never did." I laid my head on Ranger's shoulder.

"The whole time I was dating Joe my mom pushed and pushed for me to marry him, and I just couldn't do it. I tried to convince myself that I could some day. I loved him, but not enough to marry him and live my mom's life." I finally took a deep breath and pulled away from Ranger. I slid to the edge of the bed and attempted to stand up. Ranger held onto my hand until my eyes locked on his. Finally after several long seconds he released me. I walked into the bathroom and blew my nose and washed my face.

Stopping at the kitchen to grab a bottle of water from the fridge, I took another deep breath and blew it out. Feeling like I finally had control of myself again, I walked back into the bedroom to find that Ranger was sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for me. He'd obviously gotten up as well, because I couldn't miss the black silk boxers lying low on his hips. I walked to the closet and put on Ranger's robe.

I took a deep breath and blurted out, "Joe called me at the hospital and told me that he heard me say I was in love with you."

I looked at Ranger's expressionless face and suddenly the light bulb went on. "You knew he called me, didn't you?"

Ranger nodded his head. "He said he would."

I was shocked. "You talked to him about it?"

"Yes." I watched as Ranger's eyes became unreadable again. We were definitely going to have to work on that.

"When?" I asked.

"The day you were released. I went to take care of some things before taking you home. He was waiting for me in the parking lot at the hospital." I turned away, setting the bottle of water on the nightstand. I paced back and forth for a few minutes while Ranger patiently waited.

"Was it your idea for him to go away for a few weeks?" I asked quietly.

"No, it was his." I knew Ranger would never lie to me, so I believed him.

"Will you tell me about your conversation?"

Ranger watched me for a minute. "Some day maybe."

I thought about pushing further, but I wasn't sure if I really wanted to know or if I was just being nosy.

"I hurt him so much. I feel so terrible knowing that I considered marrying him just so I could be what everyone wanted me to be. I feel even worse knowing I was in love with you and yet I stayed with him trying to be what everyone expected me to be, the perfect Burg wife. I knew deep down, I think, that I'd never marry him." I walked back over and sat on the bed. This time I reached for and held Ranger's hand.

"I take full responsibility for my actions, but the fact that I knew how you felt about relationships helped me stay in denial. I'd tell myself that you could never love me and it couldn't work with us, so I might as well stay with Joe, get married and make everyone happy. The reality is I was already in love with you. You were always there for me, every single time I needed you. I love you so much. I do. But I wish I hadn't hurt Joe."

"If Morelli had really loved you for yourself, Babe, he wouldn't have tried so hard or so often to change you." Ranger must have read the stricken look on my face or else he was using his ESP again.

"This is different, and you know it. You've asked me to _share_ who I am _with _you. You wanting to be a part of my life isn't asking me to change who I am. You've never asked me to _change_ who I am _for _you. Morelli wanted to change who you are, and he could never realize that you're perfect the way you are."

I looked at Ranger, completely stunned. "No one's ever said that to me. Not once in my life has anyone ever told me I was perfect at anything."

"After we spent the night together, after the deal I forced you into, I used to watch you sleep sometimes when you didn't know, when you were staying at my place or when I was staying at yours waiting for Scrog to make his move when he had Julie. I'd lie there next to you and watch you for hours after you fell asleep, and I wanted you so much it was like a madness inside of me. And I'd think about how perfect you were." Ranger lifted my hand to his mouth and kissed my fingers.

"I kept telling myself after all I've seen and done that I didn't deserve you. Over and over I'd watch you walk away with Morelli. Hell, I'd all but shove you into his arms, because I knew I didn't deserve you, that my life was too dangerous to drag you into. It was knowing that and years of strict self-discipline that allowed me to sleep with you and not touch you." I watched as Ranger's barely-there smile tilted up the corners of his mouth.

"And a lot of running and very cold showers," Ranger said, his tone dry and mocking. I smiled back at him and then watched his face as it turned serious again.

"I never knew." My voice was whisper soft. But inside a part of me had known.

"I never intended for you to know, and I'm real good at hiding what I'm feeling." When I smiled he gave me an almost smile back.

"When Scrog had Julie I almost gave it up then and said the hell with it. I almost took from you what I wanted. I was so frightened for my daughter and felt so helpless. I'd wait for you to go to bed and fall asleep, and I'd crawl into bed next to you and pull you into my arms. All I could think about was burying myself inside of you and letting you take away the frustration and the feeling of helplessness for a while, but I couldn't. It wouldn't have been right. You were doing everything in your power to help me, and I couldn't take advantage of you that way."

"So much for being a mercenary," I said with a small smile. Ranger just looked at me.

"You're not a job to me, Steph." Ranger's voice was deadly serious. I lifted my hand and gently brushed his silky hair off of his forehead.

"You've been there every time I've ever needed you. And you were my friend. Helping you find your daughter was the least I could do." I looked at him closely. "I love you."

"I love you too, Babe, which brings us back to my initial question. Where do we go from here?"

I looked at Ranger, needing him to understand my fears. "I don't know. I need to feel like I have a commitment from you. At the same time I guess everything I've told you explains why I'm so messed up about marriage. I just don't know if I'd be any good at it. I look at my mom and Val and Mary Lou, and I'm not even sure I want to get married again. I think I know now that I only married Dickie for my mom's approval. And god only knows what kind of disaster I'd be as a mother."

"Babe, you'd make a wonderful mother. Of course I'd want them to be all boys. If I had a daughter that looked like you, I'd lock her away and kill any boy that came near her." Ranger didn't look like he was joking.

"Ranger, you have a daughter, and I've seen her. She looks like her dad, which means she's gorgeous. I would point out she _is not _locked away." I knew instantly that my words hurt him.

"I'm sorry. That was thoughtless." Ranger quickly recovered and he leaned forward and kissed me.

"It's not a problem, Babe. You have an admirer there, you know." And now he gifted me with a full on smile.

"I do?" I asked smiling back.

"Since the Scrog ordeal Julie calls me more often, and she sends me e-mails. She laughed the whole time she was telling me about the PMS coffee incident. She told me you're the bravest woman she knows and how you kicked Scrog in the head just before he stunned you."

"She's a great kid. And gutsy like her dad," I said thinking of how she'd launched herself at Scrog to save Ranger and how she'd shot Scrog in the chest.

"Yeah, she is. And it scares the crap out of me. She now wants to be a bond enforcement agent _like Steph_ and work for Rangeman when she gets older." Ranger just gave me a dark look when I started laughing.

"What did you tell her?"

"I called Rachel in a panic. Like you, her mother just laughed and said that Julie will likely change her mind about what she wants to be when she grows up a hundred times between now and when she turns 18. She said if I insist that she gets a college education first, I should be able to buy myself a couple of more years beyond high school, giving myself 12 or 13 years before I need to start panicking." We both laughed for a minute before Ranger turned serious again.

"Let me make this easier for you. I want a commitment from you too. I want you to live with me. I want to go to bed with you at night and wake up with you in my arms every morning," Ranger said.

I hesitated, and then I tried to be as honest as Ranger was being. "I love you. I want to be with you. I'm just not sure --"

"If it will make you more comfortable, I'll pay the rent on your apartment for the next six months. It's already paid up through the end of the month anyway. That way you have somewhere to go if I start to drive you nuts or when I have to go out of town for a while." It didn't surprise me that Ranger would offer to let me keep my apartment. No one understood independence like Ranger.

"I'd like to think you'd be happy staying here while I'm gone, but I don't want you to feel smothered." I laughed at that and earned a scowl.

Finally, taking a very deep breath, I jumped. "I don't think that will be necessary."

Watching Ranger smile, I decided to add, "But maybe you could keep one of the apartments on the fourth floor open for me just in case."

Ranger's smile turned into laughter as he dragged the robe off my body and pulled me down onto the bed. Removing his boxers he again rolled to cover my body with his. The laughter died, and I watched as his eyes once again took on a focused intensity just before I felt him slide into my welcoming body. As Ranger slowly made love to me, all thoughts about the future ceased to exist for both of us.


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews, and I apologize for not responding individually to thank you. I promise to try to do better._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate for taking time on her day off to help me over the hurdle and give me encouragement. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

_I apologize that this chapter is a little short. It's just the way it came out._

**Learning about love – Chapter 7**

When Ranger finally allowed me to stagger out of bed some time later, I made my way to the bathroom and into the shower.

I had a slight headache and wasn't sure if it was from the emotions that had been rung out of me today or because of the intensity of the numerous Ranger-induced orgasms. I could have sworn the last one had blown the top of my head off, and yet I was stunned by the gentleness he had shown me.

When I stepped out of the shower, I walked into the kitchen to find Ranger leaning against the counter. "I'm going to jump in the shower. Ella should be here shortly with dinner."

"Did you tell her to bring dessert? You've drained all my energy. I need sugar." Ranger's mouth tipped up at the corners as he pushed off the counter and approached me.

"Complaining, Babe?" Duh, what kind of woman would complain about sex with Ranger?

"Nope. Not me."

He wrapped his hand around the back of my neck and pulled me to him. After a soft kiss placed gently on my lips, the small smile turned to a full on smile.

"I was thinking about what happened the last time you went off sugar, and I told Ella to hold the dessert." When I narrowed my eyes at Ranger, he softly chuckled and started toward the bathroom. I heard the door close behind him and seconds later the sound of water running.

I blew out a breath and started to the bedroom to change from Ranger's soft fluffy robe to some real clothes when there was a soft knock on the door.

Crap, I thought. Too late. I opened the door, and Ella bustled in with a dinner tray containing grilled pork chops, wild rice and salad. Her expression never flickered at my attire. She just smiled.

Realizing Ranger had been serious about no dessert, I turned to Ella.

"Ella, everything looks wonderful." She threw me a smile.

"Thank you, dear. Is there anything else I can get you before I leave?"

"No, thank you." As Ella again smiled at me she turned to leave. Her eyes were twinkling as if we were sharing a secret. She left the apartment and closed the door softly behind her.

I got into the bedroom just as Ranger was coming in from the bathroom. He had a towel wrapped loosely around his waist, and it was all I could do not to say the hell with Ella's dinner, pull the towel off and jump him where he stood. As I raised my eyes up the muscular body in front of me to the gorgeous face I felt the impact of Ranger's eyes. Then he slightly raised an eyebrow. Knowing he could read my mind, I turned quickly away and began grabbing clothes.

I nearly yelped when I felt the strong arm come around my waist and pull me back against Ranger's hard chest. Then nearly whimpered at his rough voice against my ear.

"We can skip dinner, Babe." I felt Ranger's body responding to the contact with mine. I stood frozen, eyes closed, as I wondered how he could possibly be ready so soon after the way we'd spent the last couple of hours.

I was just about ready to say fuck it when my stomach growled. I could feel Ranger's body shaking in silent laughter.

"Okay, maybe not." I pried Ranger's arm away from my waist and turned my best pissed off look at him. I knew it didn't have the desired effect when he simply laughed. Grabbing my hand he tugged me toward the kitchen.

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

After dinner Ranger and I loaded the dishwasher. He turned and pinned me against the counter and captured my mouth in a deep, drugging kiss. Wondering how long it would take me to get used to the new freedom we felt with one another, I let him slowly take me under.

When Ranger finally pulled back, he gave a little sigh, and I uncurled my fingers that were gripping the front of his shirt.

"I have some paperwork I have to get done. Do you want to come downstairs and hang out with the guys for a while?' I remembered now that Ranger had been in the middle of some work when I'd barged into his office hours ago. I tried to feel guilty about pulling him away from his work, but I just couldn't do it.

Reading my mind, Ranger's eyes lit with amusement. "It was worth it, Babe."

I rolled my eyes. "I think I'll just pop a movie in and curl up on the couch. I'm worn out." Again Ranger's mouth tipped up in a barely-there smile.

"Get plenty of rest. I'll be back in a couple of hours." With one last kiss he was gone


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews, and I apologize for not responding individually to thank you. I promise to try to do better._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate for taking time on her day off to help me over the hurdle and give me encouragement. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

_I apologize that this chapter is a little short. It's just the way it came out._

**Learning about love - Chapter 8**

I must have fallen asleep before Ranger had come in the night before. When I woke up I was in bed wrapped in his arms. I turned and pressed a kiss against his neck, inhaling his scent deeply. He smelled wonderful.

How many times had I waken beside Ranger unable to touch him as I wanted because of my need to be faithful to Joe? For the first time I felt free to touch and to taste as I pleased.

Even as I felt the heat rise in my cheeks at the thought of being bold with Ranger, I tilted my head and I did what I wanted, sliding my tongue over his chest; licking him, tasting him. Loving the saltiness of his skin and wanting more, I leaned up and flicked my tongue over Ranger's nipple and was rewarded by a low growl that rumbled through his chest.

"Is this the part where you rub against me and jump on for a ride?"

I froze in shock, unable to believe what I'd heard. I didn't say anything. After a long, silent minute Ranger put his hand under my chin and tilted my face up to his. Seeing the horrified look on my face, Ranger started laughing.

I leaned over and nipped sharply at the nipple I had previously been licking and then slid my tongue over the area again while reaching under the blanket and stroking him. I was thrilled when Ranger quit laughing and drew in a sharp breath.

"Playing with fire, Babe," he said on a groan. I smiled as I felt Ranger's hand tangle in my hair, and I lifted my head back up to look at him.

"You spent a lot of time doing the same thing to me yesterday. It seems only fair that I should return the favor." I once again started licking Ranger's chest, working my way down his body, chuckling to myself at Ranger's strangled, 'Babe.'

** XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

A long time later I was face down on the bed trying to catch my breath.

"Shower." Ranger's voice was rough beside me, giving me a feeling of satisfaction.

"You can go first," I panted out.

"I have a better idea, Babe." Ranger rolled off the bed, scooped me up in his arms and carried me to the shower. He set me down to lean in and adjust the water temperature. When he was done, he lifted me up so that my legs were wrapped around his waist. Stepping into the shower with me, Ranger proceeded to once again amaze me with his stamina.

I watched as Ranger got out of the shower first and handed me a towel. I stood holding it against myself as I watched him dry off. My body felt battered, my legs were sore when I moved, and I had unused muscles screaming from the rigorous lovemaking we'd shared in the last 24 hours, but as I watched Ranger sliding the snow white towel over his mocha latte colored skin and perfectly toned body, I could feel myself start to drool.

Ranger looked up at me and blinked once. After searching my face, he threw his head back and burst out laughing. I glared at him, but he just smiled and walked over to me.

"I'd love to accommodate you, Babe, but don't you think we should have some food and recharge?" Ranger's voice was tinged with amusement, and for the first time since I'd met him his eyes danced with merriment and fun. I knew Ranger had a fun side that would occasionally surface, but I've often compared it to handing out little treats from time to time. This was a different Ranger. He seemed more relaxed.

When I just stood staring at him, Ranger lifted an eyebrow.

"Babe?"

"I love you." Where did that come from? I wasn't even sure I'd said it out loud until I saw Ranger's eyes darken and he started toward me.

As he approached he held out his hand to me, and taking my hand into his, he tugged me gently from the shower. When I was standing directly in front of him, he reached up and tucked my wet hair behind my ears and framed my face with his hands.

"I love you too, mi amor." Ranger leaned forward and kissed me softly and then pulled me into his arms hugging me tightly. Finally he pulled back and gave me a small smile.

Picking up the now discarded towel from the floor, he threw it in the bathroom hamper and brought me a new one. While I dried off, Ranger walked into the bedroom. When he came back, he had pulled on an old faded pair of jeans, and he was carrying his thick terry clothe robe. After wrapping me in it he led me to the kitchen.

When we got to the kitchen Ranger walked to the in-house phone he used to contact Ella and looked over at me questioningly.

"Food?"

"Absolutely food." I'd already had a vigorous morning. I was starving. I needed fuel.

"Good morning, Ella. Yes, we're ready. Thank you. That will be fine." As Ranger hung up he turned to me.

"Breakfast will be about 15 minutes. Ella wasn't sure when we'd be ready, and she didn't want it sitting there getting cold."

"That's fine. I can wait. I need coffee now, though."

As I walked past, Ranger grabbed the collar of the robe and pulled me to him for a deep kiss and then released me.

"Let me make it, Babe. I bet if you look up in that cupboard there you'll find something to tide you over while we wait for Ella." Ranger turned to run water for the coffee. Puzzled by the grin on his face, expecting to find a tree bark granola bar, I opened the cupboard door and let out a moan when I saw the familiar pastry box of Butterscotch Krimpet Tastykakes sitting on the shelf. Not even trying to guess how Ranger had pulled that off, my hand darted in and grabbed the box, once again causing Ranger to chuckle.

Amazed at this new side to Ranger, wondering how long it would last, I set my treasured box on the counter and walked over to him as he turned back from the coffeemaker. I put my arms around his neck and, taking his silky, still damp hair in my hands, I pulled his mouth to mine. I had one second to catch the look of surprise in his eyes before I kissed him with all the gratitude I was feeling. When I finally finished and stepped back, we both knew I was thanking him for far more than a box of pastries.


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews, and I apologize for not responding individually to thank you. I promise to try to do better._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate for taking time on her day off to help me over the hurdle and give me encouragement. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love - Chapter 9**

When we finished eating Ranger took our plates to the kitchen to put in the dishwasher, and I took my coffee and walked over and sat on the couch, tucking my feet under the robe. I waited for Ranger to come over and join me.

He sat down beside me. Looking at him, I said "I'm sure you need to get to work soon."

"I told them not to bother me unless it's vital. This is more important, which is why I shut off my phone. Tank knows where I am if he needs anything." Surprised and secretly thrilled that Ranger had put everything aside for me, I gave him a small smile.

Ranger reached over and took my hand just as I was taking a sip of coffee.

"I want you to meet my family." Coffee sprayed out of my mouth, and I started to choke. Ranger gave me a not so gentle tap on the back. When I finally stopped coughing I looked at Ranger and burst out laughing. The whole side of his arm and the denim covering one leg were wet. I got up and went to the kitchen. I came back and handed him a clean dishtowel.

"Sorry, but you can't just drop something like that on me out of the blue." I glared at Ranger while he wiped himself off.

"It's just my family, babe. It's not a big deal." When I looked at him like he was nuts, he merely lifted an eyebrow.

"Yeah? Well, guess what, where I come from, going home to meet a man's family is a pretty big deal." I got up and started pacing around the room.

"We're talking about meeting the Manoso's, Steph, not the mob. What's the problem here?" I could tell Ranger was sincerely puzzled.

"What if they don't like me," I blurted out.

"They'll like you." Ranger was suddenly talking to me like I was dim-witted.

"What if they think I'm ugly, or worse, stupid?"

"You're not ugly, and you're not stupid, so why would they think something like that?" Ranger asked.

Ignoring his question as irrelevant, I asked him another one that just occurred to me. "Have you told them about me?"

"Have I told them what about you?"

"That you -- That we --" Oh, great, now I _sounded _dim-witted.

"That I'm in love with you? Yes. Well, I told my mother, but by now I'm sure she's called everyone else and told them." Ranger's tone was neutral, but I saw amusement lurking in his eyes.

I walked over, sat next to him on the couch and punched him in the arm. "This isn't funny, you jerk."

I sat there for a minute trying to get my mind to stop whirling. And then I froze. In slow motion I turned and locked eyes with Ranger. "Have they heard about me blowing things up?"

Now I got the full 200-watt smile. "Tank told them."

"Oh, god." I leaned forward and put my head between my knees as Ranger's laughter rang out through the room.

When Ranger stopped laughing, he pulled me into his lap. "Don't worry so much, Babe. My family's going to love you. You're going to have to try to remember to call me Carlos, though. My mother doesn't like my street name being used inside her home or around family. Ranger is for work and missions. Carlos is for home and family."

Yeah, I thought, I'm sure Ranger's mother is going to love the woman who blows things up, burns things down and constantly has to call her son to bail her ass out of trouble. No problem. No big deal. First chance, I'm dragging Lula to go shopping. I need something to wear and about eight tubes of mascara. No, make that ten tubes of mascara.

"It feels strange calling your Carlos. You've always been Ranger to me. I'm going to have a hard time remembering."

"You've gotten real good at remembering while I'm --" I reached up and put my hand over his mouth.

"That's different." I felt Ranger's silent laughter, and he put his lips to my ear, nuzzling against me.

"We'll practice over and over until you're used to saying it in bed. It will make it easier for you to remember."

"Nice of you to help out."

"Any little thing I can do, Babe."

Deciding I'd worry about it later, I got off of Ranger's lap. I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. Yikes, I hadn't done my hair or makeup when I'd gotten out of the shower. Well, I guess if Ranger could tell me he loved me when I looked like this, he must really love me.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I walked back to the living room, and Ranger was looking at his watch.

"You need to get to work, and I need to do something about this mess," I said, reaching up and pulling the ends of my hair.

Ranger just smiled. "Come over here and sit. That will all wait a few more minutes."

I walked over and sat down.

"There's one more thing we need to talk about." Ranger's voice was serious.

"What?"

"I told you once that I wasn't emotionally distanced from you."

"Yes."

"That was even before you told me that you love me. The problem is now that you have, and I've admitted to myself how much I love you, I've started having these possessive and protective feelings toward you." Ranger sounded as if these things had just occurred to him.

"Ranger, you've had men standing outside of my apartment when I've gotten home who wouldn't let me in until they did a thorough search. They've even waited outside the door to hear the locks click. You've always been protective of me." It was my turn to talk to him like he was dim-witted.

"Yeah, well now I'm feeling possessive too. I love you, and I promise to do my best not to suffocate you or try to put any unreasonable restrictions on you, but I need to do my best to keep you as safe as I can. I'm going to ask you to give me some time to get used to these new feelings and not run away the first time you think I'm being overbearing."

"Okay," I said.

"I want my family to meet the woman I love. I've never taken a woman home to meet my family. When I do, I'll be telling everyone how I feel about you." He leaned forward and kissed me with a tenderness I would never have expected from him.

"I'd love to meet your family." Now that my initial panic had passed, I realized the truth of that statement. I'd been curious about Ranger for a long time, and here was my chance to finally learn something important about him.

Ranger's voice was deadly serious. "I've made some dangerous enemies over the years, Babe. Once I take you to meet my family, everyone on the street will know you're my woman, and we'll have to take extra precautions to assure your safety. As I said, I've made some enemies. Ninety percent of them will know to stay the hell away from you. Knowing my reputation, they won't take the chance of touching what belongs to me. The other ten percent will start plotting on the best way to use the situation to their advantage." Ranger stopped talking, and it looked like he was already planning some sort of strategy.

"Excuse me? _Your woman_? _Touching what belongs to you_? What does that mean, exactly?" I asked in my pissed off girlfriend voice.

Ranger looked at me intently, and reached out to cup my face in his hand. "It means that you're my lover, my friend, and the woman that I love. It means that now that you've told me that you love me, no other man is free to touch you. It means that you're mine."

Feeling my heart skip a beat at his words, I asked him, "And you?"

"I'm your lover, your friend and the man you love. I will touch no other woman. That makes me yours, too, Babe."

Now I gifted Ranger with a smug smile. "I can live with that."

"Yeah, well here's the part you might have a hard time living with. You're going to have to carry the GPS with you everywhere you go, and there will be one on any vehicle you drive." Noticing Steph's expression, he went on.

"It's the way it's gotta be, Babe. It's part of the package. Every Rangeman employee has a GPS unit on their vehicle. You know that. As far as your personal GPS, we'll make a deal. There's a switch on the side to turn it on and off. I'll show you how to use it. If you're feeling smothered and want to go shopping with Lula or to Point Pleasant for ice cream, you can turn it off. If you're going to do that, I'm going to ask you to check in with Tank or me so we don't worry. Same thing if you're going to be in someone else's car." He gave me a second to let that sink in.

"If you suddenly go back on the job, it only takes a flip of the switch and approximately 10 seconds to reengage and let us locate your position. The GPS is also equipped with a button on the front, a panic button. You've already had some experience with that. If you're in trouble, you push the button. We'll immediately send in the troops. If you're able to, you should try to contact me or the control room if that happens so we can try to get a handle on your situation and respond accordingly. Either way, if you hit the panic button I'll come at a dead run." He tucked my hair behind my ears.

"Now, if your GPS goes down and you haven't called in, someone, probably Tank, will try to contact your cell phone. If there's no response, back up will immediately be sent to your last known location. I assume you want to continue working for Vinnie. You can do that full time or you can work for him part time and work for me part time. Or, if you want, you can work for Rangeman full time. Either way the GPS goes with you."

"This all seems a little over the top." I said.

"In return for your agreement, I will turn down any new contracts that would take me away for long periods of time or that are particularly dangerous. Business is doing well enough that we don't need the extra money from the contracts anymore anyway. I also promise to fill you in on my whereabouts and what I'm working on when I can. I have contracts that I'm still obligated to fulfill. When I do have to be gone, I'll make sure you have your own secured phone so I can do my best to stay in contact with you." Ranger sat there quietly as I thought over all that he'd said.

"You've given this a lot of thought." I finally said.

"Babe, I've had eight long weeks of trying to think about anything but putting my hands on you. This is the way it has to be if we're going to make this work, Steph. The minute people know we're a couple, I'm putting your life in danger. That's why I've always known this wasn't a good idea."

"Why now? What made you change your mind?" I finally asked the one question that had been running through my mind, and I was shocked by the 200-watt smile Ranger gave me.

"I had a lot of time to think flying back from Miami the night I'd heard you'd been shot, and sitting at the hospital waiting for you to wake up. I finally realized something that changed everything." He was still smiling.

Thinking he was going to say he realized he loved me, wanting to hear him say it again, I asked, "What was that?"

"You're more dangerous than I am, Babe. You get shot at more often than I do, people try to blow you up, your cars get destroyed, and buildings get burned down around you. You're probably the only woman I'll ever meet who will constantly put me in more danger than I do her."

Stung by Ranger's words and the fact that he was so amused, I jumped up from the couch. Before I could start totally flipping out or storm out of the room Ranger stood up and pulled me into his arms, laughing and ducking as I took a swing at him.

"You are such an ass."

Still laughing Ranger grabbed my hands and pinned them behind my back with one hand and took a hold of my face with the other. Seeing the sheen of tears in my eyes, he suddenly turned serious.

"You've always been so damned loyal to me, putting yourself at risk for me over and over, without question, every time I've ever asked you to; when I was wanted for questioning for the murder of Homer Ramos, when I used you as bait to get my daughter back, when I asked you to plant a bug on your ex-husband. Never once have you told me no or questioned my motives." I raised my eyebrows up to my hairline and looked at Ranger in shock and again he started laughing.

"Okay, maybe you questioned my motives, but you never let it stop you from helping me, even when I couldn't answer all your questions to your satisfaction. How could I not fall in love with you? You are so beautiful. You're the most loyal and courageous woman I've ever known. I finally decided I couldn't live without you, and I'd just have to work really hard to keep you safe so I could have you in my life." Overwhelmed by Ranger's words I tugged my hands free from behind my back and put my arms around him. Just as Ranger's mouth touched mine there was a knock at the door.

Swearing softly Ranger stepped back. "Before I answer that, are you okay with staying here and taking this a day at a time for now and seeing how it goes?

Suddenly I realized with the exception of the extra precautions, Ranger was leaving all the decisions up to me, and what a wonderful feeling it was.

"I'm perfectly okay with it."

With one last quick kiss he turned and headed toward the door. "I'll call my mom and set up dinner for one day this week."

"That's fine. I've got to run and get dressed. I'll be right out."


	10. Chapter 10

**Learning about love – Chapter 10**

I had dressed, done my hair and makeup and I was heading back into the living room to say goodbye to Ranger. I heard voices and realized Tank must not be finished talking to him. I don't know why, but when I heard Tank say my name I stopped and listened.

"You said once the doctor cleared her, you'd tell me what Steph said about me at the hospital that made you laugh your ass off. You said something about me not being safe. She's cleared. Now tell me what the hell was so funny." Tank was obviously impatient to hear Ranger's answer. I could understand that. I wanted to know too.

My curiosity was peaked when I thought I heard a smile in Ranger's voice. "She didn't really say anything _about you_; she thought she was saying it _to_ _you_."

When Ranger didn't say anything else, I almost walked out and demanded that he go on. It didn't take long, though, for Tank to do it for me.

"Okay, what did she think she was saying _to_ me?"

"You know how she kept waking up and talking to you?"

"Sure, we finally figured out it was because I was with her when she was shot. So?"

"Yeah, well, you were out of the room, and she started talking to you. I tried to tell her it was me and, of course, I called her babe. And she kept saying that you weren't allowed to call her babe, that only '_Ranger's' _allowed to call her babe." It was quiet, so I assumed Tank was processing that. I was standing there smiling when I heard Tank speak again.

"That's it? What did she want to talk about?"

Ranger's response held a different tone that I couldn't put a finger on; gentleness and something else I didn't recognize. "None of your business."

Tank laughed and said, "Must have been something good."

"You want to hear the rest of this or not," Ranger asked him.

"I've been bugging the shit out of you about it for two months. Of course, I want to hear the rest."

"I was tired, and I kept forgetting that I was supposed to be you. The last time I called her babe, she threatened to stun you if you did it again." Now there was pure amusement in Ranger's voice.

Once again the room got quiet. I had my hand over my mouth so they wouldn't hear me snickering.

And then I heard Tank speak again, sounding incredulous. "She threatened to --"

"Stun you. She said, 'Tank, if you ever call me babe again, I'll stun you." Ranger started laughing out loud now. I peeked my head around the corner. Both Ranger and Tank were in the kitchen leaning back against the counter on opposite sides of the small room, giving me a good look at their profiles.

"She didn't really mean it. Steph wouldn't really stun me." Tank paused. "Would she?"

"I don't know. You tell me. You're the one who's embarrassed Hal by playing the tape of her stunning him over and over for everyone to see." Now I had one hand over my mouth and the other holding my stomach trying to hold in the laughter. I knew that everyone had seen me stun Hal on the security camera when he tried to stop me from leaving the building once, but I didn't know Tank actually had it on tape.

"Do you think she remembers," I heard Tank ask Ranger.

"No," Ranger responded. "If she did, I think she would have mentioned it by now."

Tank looked like he was thinking about this for a minute and then he broke into a smile.

"This is going to be fun. How come you wouldn't tell me about this until the doctor cleared her?"

"I figured you'd torture her with it when you found out, and I thought it was only fair for her to be on her feet when you did." I watched as Ranger took a drink of his coffee.

"Look at you. Big Bad Ranger being all protective of the little woman. She's turning you into a real honest to goodness boyfriend." Tank laughed as he stressed the _boy_ part of boyfriend.

I watched Ranger look at him with one eyebrow raised. "You want me to kick your ass this morning?"

Tank didn't look too worried by the possibility. "Looking out for her feelings; sending the guys out for doughnuts." I watched as Ranger set his coffee down on the counter and turned slowly toward Tank.

Tank started laughing and headed for the door. "And yesterday I caught you whistling while you were working in your office."

"Fuck you, Tank."

"Show tunes." Tank yelled.

"Sideways." Ranger yelled back. I could hear Tank's laughter as the door closed behind him.

Ranger walked around the corner and looked down to where I had slid to the floor laughing and holding my stomach. He leaned down, grabbed me by the front of my shirt and lifted me to my feet.

"Show tunes?" I was still laughing.

"How much did you hear," Ranger asked.

"All of it." I said smiling at him. I walked directly to the living room and grabbed my purse. I was still smiling as I started taking things out and began rummaging through it. Suddenly a hand came into my field of vision, and Ranger's stun gun was in front of my face. I looked up at him.

Ranger gave me the 200-watt smile. "Fully charged."

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Ranger had hurried into the bedroom, dressed and headed out the door. He gave me one soul-burning kiss before leaving. I wasn't sure why, but he asked me to give him a few minutes head start before I came down to the comp area on the fifth floor.

I took a grape and a carrot out of the fridge, dropped them in the cage for Rex, and watched as he grabbed the grape and scurried back into his can. I then grabbed my purse and tucked Ranger's stun gun in the small of my back, tucked into my jeans, and headed down to the fifth floor with a smile on my face. This was going to be fun.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

When I stepped off the elevator I saw Ranger leaning against the bank of monitors next to Hal with a cup of coffee in his hand. He was listening to something Hal was saying to him. I watched him for just a second, amazed at how my heart picked up speed thinking about the night we'd spent together and the way we'd started the morning. Without warning Ranger's eyes shot to mine and held them. The message his eyes sent me told me he was thinking about the morning too.

Ranger said something to Hal. I watched as Hal gave Ranger a puzzled look then reached up and hit a button on the control panel in front of him.

Ranger crooked his finger at me in a come here gesture. As I started walking toward him, Tank came out off the office and started down the hall. I looked over at him and then back at Ranger. Ranger gave me his almost smile, but his eyes were laughing as he silently saluted me with his coffee cup before taking a sip.

I waited until Tank was in the middle of the comp room floor before I approached him so everyone could watch the show.

"Hey, Tank." I gave him an innocent smile.

"Hey, ah --" He paused and looked over at Ranger and smiled, "-- Steph. What's up?"

"Not much. Just wanted to check in to see if you had any assignments for me. Ranger said I should check with you since you've been running things all morning." I told the lie hoping Ranger would back me up.

Tank looked over at Ranger, and Ranger just lifted his eyebrows slightly.

"Sure, ah, Steph. We've got a repeat skip if you want to ride along with Lester. He's due on the clock in about ten minutes. He's already got the paperwork, so you can meet him down in the parking garage if you want." I noticed how Tank kept hesitating when he said my name, and I was frantically trying to figure out a way to get him to call me babe when I suddenly had an idea.

I walked up to Tank's left side and put my arm around his broad back, giving him a pat on his right shoulder.

"Thanks, big guy." I said and smiled up at him. I pretended to start to turn and walk away and got my wish.

Tank shot Ranger a wide smile. "No problem, _Babe_."

Reaching behind my back as I shifted away from Tank, I glanced at Ranger. He was watching Tank and me closely.

"By the way, Tank, just one more thing," I said sweetly.

"What's that, _Babe_?" He choked out on a laugh as he started to turn and look at me.

"Oh, just this," I answered as I put the stun gun to his muscled bicep and hit the button.

Having no chance to react, Tank made a noise that sounded suspiciously like "EEEEEK" and went down like a ton of bricks.

I leaned down and said, "I told you if you ever called me babe again I'd stun you. Guess you forgot."

The entire room froze until Hal started laughing. "He went EEK. Tank EEKED."

Within seconds every man on the fifth floor of Rangeman was laughing so hard they couldn't stand upright. Some had sat down to keep from falling over and others, like Ranger, were doubled over with laughter. Junior had slid down the wall next to him overcome with laughter much like I had been earlier upstairs.

Smiling, I walked over to Ranger. I leaned down even with his face where he was still doubled over, roaring with laughter, and kissed his cheek.

With no more than a "See ya later, honey," to Ranger, I calmly turned and walked out the door, taking the steps to the parking garage to wait for Lester.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

After helping Lester deliver his man to the police department, I went back to Rangeman with him. Not wanting to run into Tank just yet, I called Ranger and asked him to meet me in the garage and drop me at my mom's house where Lula was going to pick me up.

When he walked down to the garage, he strolled over to me and captured my mouth with his. Once inside the Porsche he started telling me about everyone's reactions to my stunning Tank. By the time we got to my mother's house we were both breathless from laughter.


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 11 **

I sat in the car as Ranger parked in my parent's driveway. I dreaded going in. The talk I'd had with Ranger the day before had brought to surface all of the bitterness I didn't realize I still had buried inside of me. I knew I was going to have to explain why I was still living with Ranger, and I knew there was going to be a scene when I told my mother that I was going to continue living with him.

"Babe." I looked over to find Ranger's head turned my way. I couldn't see his eyes through the dark sunglasses, but I knew he was watching me intently.

I blew out a breath and reached for the door handle.

"Do you want me to go in with you?" I turned back and goggled at Ranger.

"What?"

"Do you want me to go in with you," he repeated.

"No, that's okay." I started to open the car door, and I froze. Turning back I looked at Ranger.

"Wait. You want to go in there with Grandma Mazur there?" I was having a hard time imagining Ranger voluntarily going in the house with me.

"I didn't say I _wanted _to do anything. I asked if you wanted me to go in with you."

"Thanks anyway, but I can handle it." I watched as my mother and Grandma Mazur stepped out onto the porch. Again reaching for the door handle, I felt Ranger's hand warm at the back of my neck.

"Aren't you forgetting something, Babe?" I turned once again to face him only to have him pull me to him and capture my mouth in a kiss that he slowly took deeper. When he finally pulled back, I wished that I could see his eyes.

"I love you," I blurted out as I quickly opened the door. Just before I shut it behind me I thought I heard Ranger's reply.

"Te amo, tambien, bebe." _(I love you, too, Babe) _Telling myself to pick up a Spanish translation book as soon as possible, I hurried to the porch as Ranger backed out of the driveway and took off.

My mother started in on me before he'd gotten half way down the street.

"What were you doing out here," she asked.

"Ellen, you know what she was doing. We both seen her kissing that hot Ranger. Looked like a pip of a kiss too." My grandma looked at me with a twinkle in her eyes. I smiled back at her.

"What will the neighbors think about you making out with that man in the driveway in broad daylight? Well, come in for goodness sake. No sense giving them anything else to wonder about."

We walked into the house, and my mother immediately pounced. "Now that you're all better, you'll be moving back to your place, right? Or are you going to be living with Joseph again? I can't imagine why he'd let you live with that man for the last two months."

"She's worried about you living in sin with Ranger," Grandma Mazur whispered to me.

"Why is it okay for me to live with Joe but not Ranger?"

"Lois Kelner across the street said she heard he kills people." My mother crossed herself.

"Mom, Mrs. Kelner thought he was a terrorist the last time he was here." I watched as once again she crossed herself.

"He's hot. I think you should marry him instead of Joe." Grandma Mazur winked at me.

"Actually, we thought we'd just live together for a while and see how it goes. We haven't really discussed marriage." Okay, so I fibbed to my mother. Sue me. My mother gasped, and I could feel my eye starting to twitch as she crossed herself again.

Apparently it was getting on Grandma Mazur's nerves, too. "You didn't cross yourself when Stephanie was living with Joseph Morelli. You started picking out china patterns and wedding dresses."

I looked over at my mom to see what she would say to that.

"B-B-But that was Joe. Joe's from the Burg. Okay, I'll admit his Grandma Bella's a little crazy, but then --" My mom trailed off as she looked at Grandma Mazur. "Sometimes allowances have to be made. Besides, Joe's mother is a very nice woman. Does that man --"

I interrupted her. "His name is Ranger, not 'that man'.

"What kind of name is Ranger anyway," my mother asked suspiciously.

"It's his street name, like one of them gang people. Except his is from the Special Forces when he used to kill people for the government. We talked about this, Ellen, the first time he came here for dinner. Remember?" I knew my grandmother was trying to be helpful, but my mother just crossed herself again.

I'd had enough. "Stop doing that. He almost never kills people. His real name is Ricardo Carlos Manoso, only everyone calls him Ranger. Except his family. They call him Carlos." My tone of voice was just short of pissy.

"Right. Family. That's what I was asking. Does, ah, Ranger have a mom?" My mother sounded rattled.

"Yeesh. Yes, he has a mom, and I'm sure she's very nice." At least I was hoping she was. I couldn't think about Ranger's mom right now while I was trying to deal with my own.

"Have you ever met her?"

"Well, no, but we're supposed to be having dinner there sometime this week." At least I assumed that's when we'd be having dinner there.

"You haven't even dated this man, and now you're living with him and going to meet his family? Isn't this a little sudden?" I thought about my mother's words for a minute. For the first time, it occurred to me that it did seem strange to be moving in with Ranger when we'd never really dated. I started thinking about the things Ranger and I have done together, places we'd gone, and none of them quite added up to dating. Wondering how I should feel about that, I watched in fascination as my mother did a complete turn around.

"You're going to have dinner with his family? Well, you have to bring him here for dinner first. What kind of daughter are you that you didn't tell me this before? What should I cook? Pot roast? Ham? Well? I have to go shopping. You'll come tonight for dinner. And what about dessert? What does he like for dessert?"

"Ranger doesn't really eat dessert." I watched as my mom looked at me like I'd answered her in a foreign language.

"Mom, Ranger's eaten with us before. It's not a big deal." I thought about how Ranger had said the same thing to me earlier, but I didn't think that counted because I've never met his family.

Grandma Mazur looked at me. "Yeah, but that was when you were just working with him. Your mother wasn't hearing wedding bells then." My mother started to cross herself again, but when she saw my eyes narrow, she put her hand back down.

"He likes chicken. And rice. He eats a lot of rice," I told her. This earned me another puzzled look.

I heard a car pull into the driveway and said, "Well, there's Lula. Gotta go. I'm helping her pick up a skip."

"Do you need any help? I could go up and get my gun. It wouldn't take me long to get ready." My grandma started toward the stairs.

"NO," my mother and I both shouted.

"Thanks, but it's not a big deal. We're good." I started toward the door.

"Probably I should stay and make sure your mother doesn't tipple too much before she drives to the grocery store anyway." I gave her and my mom a wave goodbye and went out to jump in the car with Lula, my heart thumping with the bass blaring out through the speakers of the firebird.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX **

Lula and I entered Vinnie's office together. Conversation had been impossible over the booming car stereo.

Connie was at her desk, and she looked up as we entered.

"Hey, what's going on, guys? Boy is Vinnie going to be glad you're coming back. He's been bitching about these low bonds not getting picked up, and Ranger wouldn't take them."

Before I could answer, Lula piped up. "Steph here keeps grinning to herself like she's got a secret, so I'm guessing she took my advice about jumping Batman."

Both women turned their complete attention to me. I could feel myself start to squirm.

"Yep, she did it." Connie started laughing.

"So, did you wait 'til he was sleeping and take his pecker for a ride," Lula demanded.

"Did you wait for him naked on the couch," Connie asked.

"Neither." I could feel the heat in my face. I wasn't much on discussing my sex life with other women, not even these two women who were my friends.

"After we left Ranger finished what you'd both started in the office yesterday, didn't he? Hot damn. I knew he would." Lula hooted, and turned to high five Connie.

"When Lula and I walked past him on the way out of the apartment, we could feel the intensity rolling off of Ranger in waves. We fanned ourselves all the way back to the office, and we even had the air conditioning on in the car." Connie was laughing as she waved her hand in front of her face.

"That man gives me hot flashes. Tank was a very lucky man last night. I left out the part about me feeling all hot and bothered after seeing Batman's hard on, though. Didn't want to hurt his feelings." Lula smirked at us like she thought that was clever. I didn't have the heart to tell her that Tank's body was pretty limp when I left Rangeman. I was hoping by the time she found out, all his parts would be in working order again.

"Lula," Connie snorted out a laugh.

"Yeah, like you didn't peek."

"Well, I don't have a man. I'm allowed to look," Connie answered her in a prissy voice.

"Hello!" I raised my voice to get their attention.

"That's _**my**_ man's hard on you're both discussing." Ignoring my pissy voice Connie and Lula both started laughing.

"That's what you get for hooking up with a stud like Ranger. Women walk into walls around your man, honey. You better get used to it." Connie didn't even bother trying to sound sympathetic.

"Give us all the details. Don't leave anything out. How big is he? It's kinda hard to tell exactly through pants. How many times did you do it," Lula demanded.

"I can't give you details about my sex life with Ranger. Ranger's a fanatic about his privacy. You both know that."

"If Ranger was so fanatic about keeping his sex life private, maybe he should have hid his fine self behind his desk yesterday and let you open the door when we got there."

Seeing the stubborn look that crossed my face, Connie deep sighed. "Okay. At least tell us when you're going to take your turn."

"My turn at what?" I was confused.

"Jumping Ranger, that's what," Lula answered.

"I'm not discussing this with you. The last time I listened to the two of you, Ranger caught us. It was embarrassing. Besides, I don't need advice now."

"Sure you do, 'cause I know all about men and, girlfriend, men like Ranger want a woman who's aggressive once in a while. They don't want no shy woman waiting around for them to make the moves all the time. A man like that would get bored with that crap. You have to shake things up. Keep him on his toes." I blew out a breath.

"I don't need any advice. It's not like I've never done this, you know."

"Lula, you're forgetting about Joe Morelli," Connie said.

"Yeah, well this ain't officer hottie. This here's Batman." Lula sounded like she knew what she was talking about.

"And it don't have to be in the bedroom neither. Guys like variety. Maybe in his office across his desk or something. You could even play secretary. Some men like the whole role-playing thing. Last night I was the helpless virgin, and my man Tank was the conquering Viking." Connie and I just stared at Lula in horror. I fought to keep the image of Lula and Tank playing sex games out of my head. It didn't work. I had a sudden image of Lula playing the role of a helpless virgin. I tried biting the inside of my cheek, but it didn't help. Looking up, I locked eyes with Connie. Immediately we both started giggling. When the giggles turned into uncontrollable laughter, Lula spoke up.

"Hey, it ain't that funny. I can play the shit out the helpless virgin role."

I was still laughing when suddenly Lula and Connie went completely still, their eyes focusing on the door behind me. When the familiar touch of Ranger's hand settled on the back of my neck, I leaned back into his warm body and smiled as his other arm came around my waist pulling me close.

"Yo."

"Yo, yourself."

"Didn't you have a meeting or something this morning," I asked. I felt my eyelids flutter half closed as I inhaled the warm scent of Ranger mixed with Bulgari. I wondered if I'd ever get used to his effect on me.

"All wrapped up, Babe," Ranger said, his mouth close to my ear. Connie and Lula were watching us closely.

"I need to talk to you outside." Ranger turned me toward the door.

When we got outside he nudged me into the alley beside Vinnie's building. The minute we were in the shadows Ranger backed me against the brick wall, molded his body against mine and kissed me. The kiss was hot. When his tongue touched mine, I felt my knees buckle and my brain go foggy. By the time he lifted his head I was gripping his shoulders in an attempt to hold myself upright. Seeing the look in Ranger's eyes, I felt myself go damp. Damn, I thought, how could he make my hormones go haywire with one kiss?

When Ranger tilted his head and placed a kiss at the base of my neck, I decided it was one of those Batman mysteries that didn't need to be solved.

I shivered as Ranger's mouth trailed up to my ear. I heard him chuckle softly at my low moan and then he took a step back. Placing a quick kiss on my mouth, he took another step putting some distance between us.

"I have to catch a flight to Miami, Babe."

My mind instantly snapped back into focus. "Is this business or pleasure?"

"I have to pick up a skip." Ranger reached out and gently tucked a stray curl behind my ear.

"When are you leaving?"

Ranger looked at his watch. "I have just about enough time to go back to the office to get the paperwork and get to the airport."

"When will you be back?" I realized that I didn't like the idea of Ranger leaving. Then I shifted my body, and the mild soreness of my legs and other areas of my body told me it might be a good thing.

"I'll pick him up first thing in the morning. If everything's in order, I should be back sometime tomorrow afternoon. I'll call to let you know what time my flight is coming in." I thought of having the bed and all those silky sheets to myself and suddenly I was feeling slightly better about things.

"Do you want me to go with you?" I thought I'd at least offer.

"I was going to ask you to do just that, but it's going to be after 9:00 when I get there, and I'll be back in the air first thing tomorrow. I won't even have a chance to see Julie this time around. But if you have an urge to spend most of today and tomorrow on an airplane, I'll have Tank call and get you a ticket.

Just because I was secretly thrilled that Ranger would invite me to go along with him didn't mean I was stupid.

"Thanks, but I think I'll pass."

Ranger's eyes crinkled at the corners like he was thinking about smiling.

"Thought you might, Babe." Taking another look at his watch, Ranger pulled me in for another hot kiss.

"I've got to go. Tank's sending someone over to drop off a car for you. Try to stay out of trouble while I'm gone." I gave him a pissy look, and the corners of his mouth tipped up.

"I thought I'd run by my apartment and start packing up the rest of my stuff."

"Just grab what you need, Babe. You can have Tank make arrangements for moving the rest of it." I was beginning to realize there were some very cool perks to living with Ranger.

This time I stepped forward. I saw a quick flash of a smile as my mouth met Ranger's. Pouring everything I had into the kiss, I finally stepped back.

"I love you. Have a safe trip."

Ranger's eyes darkened. "I love you too, Steph." His voice, soft and husky, send shockwaves straight to my heart. I watched as he reluctantly stepped away from me.

"Don't forget to keep the G.P.S. on, Babe." And he was gone.


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 12**

I spent an hour at the office pigging out on doughnuts with Connie and Lula and catching up on the latest gossip. I finally left and headed to the apartment. As I pulled the Cayenne into the parking lot, it seemed strange that I wouldn't be living here anymore. I ignored the quick little jolt of panic and realized it was knee jerk. Within seconds I felt a contentment settle over me.

I walked into the lobby and smiled at the elderly lady standing by the elevator.

"Good afternoon, Mrs. Bestler."

"Oh, there you are, dear. You haven't shopped with us for a while. Been out chasing down bad guys, have you?"

I didn't bother explaining I'd been recuperating from a gunshot wound. "Yes, ma'am. Second floor, please."

"Lingerie, shoes and designer bags."

When I used my key to open the door, I was overcome with the urge to laugh. I must be the only person who's ever needed a key to get into this apartment, I thought. Oh, well, those days are over. No more coming home finding strange men hanging out on my couch. No more snakes or dead bodies or creepy rabbit costumes. I walked into the quiet apartment. No more disasters waiting for me when I came home every day. I took two steps into my bedroom and realized I'd spoke too soon.

I knew that Ranger had either come here or sent someone here to pick up clothes for me to have at his apartment. Looking around at the chaos in front of me, I knew there was no way Ranger or Ella or any employee at Rangeman would have left this kind of mess behind. Drawers were pulled out and emptied. The lamp from the nightstand lay overturned and broken on the floor. Clothes were strewn around the room.

Immediately my hand was on my phone.

"Yo."

"Ah, Tank, maybe you should send someone over to my apartment."

"What's going on?" Tank listened quietly and then told me to wait down in the parking lot until someone got there. Five minutes later Tank walked in, Lester by his side.

"I told you to go down and wait in the parking lot until we got here." Tank's voice boomed out.

"Yeah, well, I didn't listen." I heard him grumble under his breath on the way to the bedroom. He came back out a few minutes later.

"You talk to any of the neighbors?"

"No."

"I know you haven't had any threats. Ranger would have told me. You been hiding anything from him?" Tank gave me a dark look.

"No."

"Any idea who might have done this?"

"Normally I could give you a list, but this is really strange. I haven't been a pain in anyone's ass for almost three months. I have no idea who it might have been."

"Bad guys and crazies have long memories," Lester said.

I huffed out a breath. "In that case, I'll need a pen and notepad for that list."

Tank just shook his head. "Go ahead an pack up your stuff. We'll help you take it back to Rangeman. I'll make arrangements with your super to have the furniture picked up later, and while I'm talking to him I'll find out if he saw anything."

"His name's Dillon," I called after him.

When Tank got to the door, he turned back to Lester. "Don't let her out of your sight."

** XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Back at Rangeman I was looking at the boxes Lester and Tank had hauled in from the SUV. I hated unpacking boxes. I turned as Tank walked into the room.

"You doing okay?"

"Yeah, I'm not even that freaked out. It all seems unreal, like it's not part of my life anymore." Denial kicks in once again.

"It is your life, Steph. Lester was right. Bad guys and crazies do have long memories. You and Ranger have had your share of run-ins with both." I thought what Tank said, and I knew he was right.

"I talked to your super. He said two men came to see about a week ago. Said they looked like they kept in shape, but nothing really stood out about them. He gave me a general description, but nothing that would be much help. Apparently they asked him if you had terminated your lease yet. He told them the rent was paid 'til the end of the month and they left."

I looked at Tank and shrugged my shoulders. I really had no clue who might have wanted to go through my things or trash my apartment.

"You gonna give me grief about me putting a man on you until Ranger gets back?" He had his hands on his hips and was glaring at me.

"Nope. As a matter of fact, I have no plans to go anywhere tonight. I have to finish unpacking, and I planned on staying in with pizza and a movie. Unless Bobby's up for another marathon of Mortal Combat."

"He'll be up for it. Call downstairs to the comp room when you're ready. I'll have him run to Pino's for the pizza." Yep, really cool perks living with Ranger.

I watched as Tank left the apartment and closed the door behind him. Looking back at the boxes, I pushed up my sleeves and went to work.

I was half way through box number three when I pulled out my black spandex workout pants and wrap around top. I had a flashback of Ranger's reaction to this outfit when I had been working for Rangeman and I'd worn it to annoy Morelli. My pulse started racing, and suddenly I felt warm just thinking about it. I folded both items of clothing and placed them in the drawer.

I had hung the last dress, folded the last t-shirt and put away the last shoe in the closet and still I couldn't get the image out of my mind of that black outfit and Ranger's eyes when I had taken off the oversized sweatshirt that I had worn over it.

With Connie and Lula's comments from this morning ringing in my ears, I walked back over to the drawer and opened it. Taking both the pants and shirt back out, I stared at them for a moment. Hmmm. The more I thought about it, the hotter it felt in the apartment. Maybe role-playing wasn't the answer for Ranger and me, but there's no law that says we couldn't have a little fun. My stomach started jumping, and I tossed the items back in the drawer. I couldn't. Hun-un. No way. I'm a coward. There is absolutely no way I could bring myself to do this. I sat down on the side of Ranger's bed. Could I?


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Major Sexual Content (SMUT), Language and Spoilers for all 13._

_Sorry to those who already read this chapter once. I found an error and removed and then re-submitted this chapter._

Learning about love - Chapter 13

I woke up and looked at the clock. Yikes, it was 10:00. Bobby had left around 11:00 the night before. Ranger called around midnight. We'd talked for a few minutes before saying goodnight.

After hanging up I had started to watch a movie and finally crawled into bed around 1:00. I remember waking up and reaching for Ranger a couple of times and finding the bed empty. God, I'm becoming pathetic, I thought. I can't even handle him being gone for one night.

I showered, ate some doughnuts and went to the comp room to work on some searches for Rangeman. I went upstairs and ate the lunch Ella brought up shortly after noon, and I kept her company and helped her while she straightened up the apartment.

I was starting to get restless when my cell phone rang. I looked at the caller i.d. and smiled.

"Yo."

"Babe."

"Where are you?"

"I have to drop this guy off, and I'll be home. I should be there in about an hour."

"Okay." I tried not to sound as excited as I felt. No sense letting Ranger know how pathetic I was becoming.

"Tank told me about your apartment. You didn't mention it last night." I heard the tension in Ranger's voice.

"Not much to mention. No threat, no pictures, no dead body, no note. For all I know it was some random person looking to rob me and left disappointed."

"Babe." I heard a soft sigh come through the phone, but I didn't say anything.

"We'll talk about this situation when I get there, Steph." I grimaced. I could already hear Ranger's lecture on being careful and being aware of my surroundings.

"Okeydokey," I said just before Ranger hung up. I looked at the phone for a second and blew out a breath. I guess some bad habits were going to be harder to break than others.

I thought about the up-coming conversation for a minute and then I turned and walked into the bedroom. I walked over to the dresser drawer and opened it. Reaching inside I pulled out the black pants and shirt that were sitting on top of the other clothes, and suddenly I knew what I was going to do. I'd have to hurry if I only had an hour before Ranger got home.

I heard Ranger's _"We'll talk about this situation when I get there," _in my head and thought, I don't think so, Carlos. I think our talk is going to have to wait.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX _Hal's POV_

I watched as Steph got off the elevator on the fifth floor. She was wearing a pair of black spandex pants and an oversized sweatshirt that went half way down to her knees. Her face was its normal beautiful self, and her hair looked pretty, but I liked it best when it was curlier and a little crazy. She glanced around until she saw me at the Rangeman security monitors and then headed my direction.

I took a breath and waited to see what she wanted. Talking to Steph always made me nervous, even more so now that everyone knew that she was living with Ranger. Just the thought of Ranger finding out how my heart started racing when his woman was near had me looking around to see if he was there. I knew he wasn't. Tank had just come out of the office to say that Ranger would be back at Rangeman in 20.

This was a habit Tank had gotten into whenever Ranger had been gone for a while. The one time Ranger had come back to the office and found some of the guys hanging out surfing the web and joking around he had not been happy, and everyone had suffered for it. Now everyone tried to be more careful, which included a heads up from Tank like the one we'd just gotten.

I had ten seconds to appreciate the scent of Steph's perfume before she leaned down to whisper to me. Reflex had me jerking back, but she asked me in her soft voice to hold still. When she put her mouth close to my ear, I could feel myself start to sweat. Telling myself to get a grip, I had to ask her to repeat what she'd said, which made me feel even more foolish.

When Steph was done explaining what she wanted me to do, I was surprised. She stood up putting a little more distance between us, allowing me to think more clearly.

"Why do you want me to do that," I asked her, confused.

I watched as pink slowly colored her cheeks and felt embarrassed myself, though I didn't know why.

"I can't tell you, and please don't ask again. I just need you to do this favor for me." I watched as she kept her eyes locked on one of the monitors in front of me now. I thought a minute about what she'd asked me to do.

"I'm not sure the boss would like it," I said, torn between wanting to do something nice for Steph and fearing Ranger's reaction when he found out.

When I didn't answer right away Steph looked back and stared right into my eyes. I was pretty sure I was going to tell her no, but then I watched as a tiny nervous smile began to hover on her lips. "Please, Hal." I knew I was a goner. Ranger might hurt me, but I told myself it would be worth it.

"Sure, Steph," I heard myself say. "I can do that." I was rewarded with a full smile now that lit up her eyes. Yep, I thought, it would be worth it.

"Thanks, Hal. Oh, and you can't tell anyone. Okay?" She sounded relieved.

Before I could make a fool of myself by stammering in front of her, she threw me one last smile and hurried back to the elevator. She stopped long enough to turn around and ask me one more thing.

"Hal, could you tell Ranger to meet me down there when he gets here? Tell him I need to see him." I watched her get in the elevator. I could see from the screens in front of me that she had gone back up to the seventh floor apartment and then she disappeared from view. I thought I'd finally figured out what she was up to. Probably I should have told her if she was planning on seducing the boss at the practice range she should change her clothes. Then it occurred to me they probably wouldn't be on her long, and I could feel myself blushing all over again.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I sat there staring at the screen for about 30 seconds before I felt a presence over my shoulder. I turned to see Tank standing there frowning at me.

"What was that all about," Tank demanded.

"Can't say," I mumbled back.

Tank watched me for a long minute. "She's Ranger's woman."

Duh, I thought. "I know that, Tank."

"You better keep it in mind." I could feel myself getting pissed at Tank's words.

"That little girl is in love with the boss. Anyone with eyes can see it. Besides, someone like her don't look at someone like me. Especially when Ranger's around," I bit out.

"Ranger's not around now." Tank was glaring at me.

"He's on his way, and I'm not stupid. I like her. So what? She's nice, and she makes me laugh. You're just still pissed because she stunned you."

"I am not pissed at her for stunning me." Because I knew it was true, and Tank would never hold it against her, I backed off.

"She just wanted a little favor, Tank. It's no big deal."

"What favor," he asked.

"None of your business. If she wanted you to know, she would have asked you. If you're still worried about it, you can ask the boss later. In the meantime, get lost. I've got work to do." Tank might be in charge when Ranger wasn't around, but I wasn't going to let him bully me either. And if he pissed me off bad enough, I'd take him in the gym and go around with him on the mats.

Tank watched me for another minute, nodded his head and went back into the office. I turned back to the monitors and hit a button on the monitor to my right and flipped a switch. After thinking about it for a couple minutes, I asked Bobby to watch the monitors for a few minutes, explaining that there was a problem with one of the cameras in the building. I then hurried down to the practice range off of the garage. I pulled a chair under the security camera and reached up to disconnect it by pulling the plug.

When I got back to my seat upstairs I told Bobby that the camera in the range was down and that I'd wanted to make sure it was just a mechanical error. I told him I'd let Ranger know so he could see to having it fixed. He just nodded his head and went back to his own cubby and back to work.

I reached over and picked up the in-house line and called Steph to let her know the camera wasn't just off, but completely deactivated. She thanked me. A few minutes later I saw her come out of Ranger's apartment and once again get in the elevator. I watched her all the way until she stepped into the practice range and then I waited for Ranger to get there.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX** Steph's POV 

I heard the door to the practice range open and close. My nerves were jumping, and I'd spent the last five minutes talking myself out of running back up to the apartment and locking myself in the bathroom.

As Ranger came into view all of my courage deserted me.

"Babe, is everything okay? Hal said you wanted me to meet you down here." No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't think of a thing to say. Ranger just gave me a puzzled look as I continued to stand there staring at him, speechless, my eyes locked on his.

Completely losing my nerve, I blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "I thought you could help me with my target practice again." Ugh. I gave myself a mental slap to my forehead.

The longer Ranger watched me, the more nervous I became. My face was hot, and I could feel myself starting to sweat in the bulky sweatshirt. I watched as understanding, followed by surprise, slowly crossed Ranger's face, and I knew he was once again reading my mind. His body tensed as he finally took a close look at what I was wearing.

When Ranger's eyes came back to mine, they pinned me with a hot look before he turned back and locked the door behind him. His eyes swept over the security camera, and I knew that he would see the wires dangling uselessly from it, thanks to Hal's handiwork.

Ranger strolled over to me like a panther stalking its prey, the look in his eyes arousing and frightening at the same time.

"I'd be happy to help you with your target practice. Where's your gun?" I tried not to squirm under Ranger's gaze.

"Um, I forgot it."

"Babe."

Overcome with nerves I couldn't stop the giggle that bubbled through my lips. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Um, I think I'll just go back upstairs and get ready for dinner. I don't want to be late. Rex needs fed." I was still rambling as I started to walk quickly toward the door, unable to believe I'd even thought I could pull this off.

As I started to skirt around Ranger, he grabbed me by the front of the sweatshirt and pulled me to him. His mouth lowered until it was barely brushing mine. His voice was husky and rough against my lips.

"Too late, Babe. You're not going anywhere. You got me down here, now we're going to do this. It's going to be good."

"Good," I parroted.

"Incredible." Ranger placed a warm kiss at the corner of my mouth.

"Mmmm."

Ranger angled his head back and watched me as I mentally cracked my knuckles. His lips tilted up the tiniest bit like he understood my dilemma and was enjoying it. Then his gaze moved lower. I followed his eyes and realized even through the oversized sweatshirt you could see my breasts rising and falling with each erratic breath I took.

"Take off the sweatshirt, Babe." When I didn't react fast enough, Ranger reached down and wrangled the shirt over my head, tossing it aside. I stood frozen as he stepped back and looked me up and down with dark, intense eyes. I couldn't help myself. I did a little looking too, allowing my eyes to travel slowly down Ranger's body as his had mine. When I got to the front of his cargo pants, I could clearly see his arousal hard and straining against the tight material. I didn't need to ask to know he was going commando just as I was. I reached my hand out and ran my fingers up and down his hard shaft as my gaze shot back to Ranger's. When I unconsciously licked my suddenly dry lips, Ranger's eyes fired hot. I stood there watching him, barely able to breathe.

Ranger pulled my hand away. "That's okay, Babe. We can use my gun." I was shocked as Ranger turned me and steered me toward the shooting area. He handed me goggles and earplugs and put his own on.

"What are you doing," I asked Ranger, my mind a whirl of confusion.

Taking his gun from his waist and handing it to me, he smirked. "Target practice, Babe. That's what you came here for, isn't it?"

Ranger had me load and unload the clip just like the last time we did this. Standing behind the counter that separated us from the firing ranger, Ranger once again had me go through the process of firing the gun, correcting my stance by standing behind me with his hands on my hips.

When Ranger molded his body to the back of mine, my hands started to shake. Ranger put his arms around me and covered my hands with his own. I could feel his hardness pressing against my ass, and if his hands hadn't been holding mine over the gun, I would have dropped it.

When the clip was empty, Ranger took the gun from my limp fingers and turned to place it up on the shelf along with our goggles and earplugs. The feeling of his hard shaft rubbing against me as he turned dragged a moan from my lips. The moan turned to a whimper of protest as I felt him step back from me. I had a moment of clarity as I wondered how this man could make me so hot with so little effort.

Ranger's hands came back to my shirt, slowly removing it, and I could no longer think at all. Within seconds his hands were on my breasts. I gasped and arched my head back as Ranger rolled and then pinched my nipples between his fingers, tugging on them as they became even harder. He angled his head and placed a not so gentle bite on the side of my neck and then kissed the area soothingly before releasing me.

I attempted to turn and face Ranger, but his hands on my shoulders stilled my movements. He slid his hands down my arms taking my hands into each of his, leaning forward and placing my palms flat on the counter in front of me. He held his hands down on top of mine for a second, letting me know without words that he wanted me to keep them there. When I gave a jerky nod to let him know I understood, he stepped back from me again.

I felt my body tremble in the silence that followed. For a full moment Ranger neither touched me nor spoke, but I could feel his eyes on my body, and I could hear his breathing become more labored. My nerves were drawn so taut that I jumped when Ranger finally reached out and ran his hand down over my ass.

"Easy, Babe," Ranger whispered as he put his hands on my hips and slowly maneuvered me backwards so that I had to lean forward to keep my hands on the counter, now using it for balance. I could feel my hands sweating, but I couldn't lift them to wipe them off without falling forward on my face.

As I felt Ranger step up close and rub himself against me from behind, any thoughts of my hands were forgotten. I heard him chuckle darkly as I moaned again. Ranger's hands slid slowly under the back waistband of the workout pants, not pulling them down, just sliding his fingertips back and forth.

"Ranger, what are you doing," I managed to pant out. I was hot all over, my center had gone from damp to wet, and I wanted him so bad I was ready to beg.

"Carlos, Babe," his voice gently reminded me.

"Carlos," I corrected.

"I'm finding out for myself, Babe." I felt my knees buckle, and I started to take my hands off the counter to stand up straight. Ranger placed one hand on my back leaning me forward again. His other hand was at my hip. At his gentle insistence I was once again in the position he wanted me in. I locked my knees as I heard his sharp command.

"Don't move."

After what felt like an eternity, Ranger's hands once again went to my hips. I felt the cool air against my heated skin as he slowly worked the tight pants down to my ankles. Kneeling behind me, Ranger lifted my right foot, bracing me so I wouldn't lose my balance. He removed my shoe and slid my leg up and out of the pant leg, leaving my pants dangling around my left ankle.

Sensations ran through my body like electricity, but I had a moment of panic as I realized how exposed and vulnerable I was. Obviously sensing my intention to move again, Ranger delivered a short slap to my ass. He then proceeded to place soft kisses over the area where his hand had landed.

"I said don't move." The words were delivered through clenched teeth, which only intensified my excitement.

Kneeling directly behind me, Ranger continued to rain kisses across my butt cheek, occasionally nipping into the soft flesh. When I started to whimper, Ranger used his hands to nudge my legs apart and then to reach up and coax me into bending forward even farther. My knuckles were white from my death grip on the edge of the counter.

With no further warning I felt Ranger's tongue begin to slide in and out of me. When he placed a gentle bite on the hard nub that he had exposed a scream was torn from my throat, and I felt my body shatter into a million pieces.

Ranger gave me no time to recover. He continued to torture me with his mouth and tongue, releasing one side of my hip to slide first one finger and then a second inside of me, thrusting in and out gently at first and then a little harder and faster with each stroke of his hand.

This time when I came, I screamed, "Carlos". Ranger stood up and, grabbing my hips roughly in his hands, he entered me hard and deep from behind. I moaned at the feeling of his hard shaft sliding slow and deep in and out of me. Lost in sensation my mind barely registered the words he was saying. I struggled to force myself to focus.

"I've thought about doing that since the last time you wore this outfit down here." He started thrusting harder and faster, the sound of our heavy breathing and the steady sound of flesh slapping flesh filling the room.

"Every time I'd come down here I'd start to get hard. I fantasized about bending you over this counter and pounding myself in you, feeling you hot and wet just like you are now." At Ranger's words I moaned low and long as I came with a hot gush, my own climax so devastating that I barely noticed his own shout of release as he buried himself to the hilt inside of me and held himself there.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Ranger held me in his arms to keep me from melting to the floor. My legs were shaking so hard I could barely stand. He was murmuring soft words in my ear, but I couldn't understand them since they were in Spanish. When my trembling stopped and I could stand unaided, Ranger helped me dress, stopping to tell me he loved me. When his voice became rough as he told me how hot it made him when he'd figured out why I'd called him down there, I knew I would do it again.

When we were both completely dressed he collected his gun and led me to the door where I waited while he walked back over to reconnect the security camera. When he came back, he guided me out the door, to the elevator, and directly up to the apartment. He didn't hold me, but he held my hand, his eyes on my face during the trip to the seventh floor.

When we entered the apartment, Ranger surprised me by scooping me into his arms and carrying me into the bedroom. Laying me on the bed, he undressed and climbed in next to me and began to remove my clothes. Ranger made love to me slowly this time, keeping his eyes locked on mine while he took me gently over the edge.

He continued to move inside me, waiting for me to build once again. When he could no longer fight the demands of his own body, he reached a hand between us. Using his fingers to bring me with him, he buried his face in my neck and this time we flew over the edge together.


	14. Chapter 14

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 14**

Ranger and I had taken a shower. For the third time that day I did my hair and makeup, not spending nearly as much time on my hair as I had the first two times, but anticipating dinner with my mother, I added an extra layer of mascara.

I walked out of the bedroom to find Ranger feeding Rex a carrot. I looked at the banana cream pie with whipped cream on top sitting on the counter. I looked at Ranger and smiled.

"Ella," I asked.

"Hal. A thank you present for the little show you put on with Tank. He's made copies of the tape to hand out to everyone. Our copy's on the coffee table." I laughed at Ranger's explanation.

"Babe, you know we're going to have to take extra precautions until we can figure out who went through your apartment." Ranger's eyes pinned me, and I knew he wasn't going to let it go.

"I know. It just seems silly. I've been out of commission. Who would want to cause me problems now?"

"I don't know. It could be someone from your past or someone related to Alvarez who's hoping to get revenge on you for killing him before he shot you. It could be someone that wants to get to me. Until we find out, I'm going to ask you to pay special attention to what's going on around you. I want you to promise to contact me or hit the panic button the minute you notice anything unusual."

"You're not going to insist on locking me up or keeping someone with me?" I couldn't believe it. Ranger was actually being reasonable about this.

"I thought about it, but I knew you wouldn't like it. I thought about doing it anyway, but with no sign of a threat being left behind, I decided we'd hold off for now. _If_ you promise to be careful."

I realized that this was Ranger's way of letting me know that he had faith in my abilities to at least somewhat take care of myself, and I had to fight back the tears that started to burn at the back of my eyes. I couldn't think of one single person who had ever had that kind of confidence in me, and I didn't know what to say.

Ranger stepped over and framed my face with his hands. "Promise me, Babe."

Smiling up into his eyes, I leaned up and kissed him softly. "Promise."

Ranger pulled me against him, and I rested my head on his shoulder for a minute. Looking over at the clock, I heaved out a sigh.

"Babe?"

"My mother wants us to come over for dinner tonight. Can you make it or do you have to work?" I tried to keep my voice casual, but I knew by the way Ranger looked at me that I'd failed.

"How bad was it?" I loved the fact that Ranger always knew the right questions to ask.

"Not too bad. I told my mother that I'm intending to live in sin with a man who, according to what her neighbor has heard, is a terrorist and kills people. After she nearly made Grandma Mazur and me cross-eyed from watching her cross herself, she actually managed to calm down a bit. Of course, she about passed out when I told her we were going to have dinner with your family. According to her, we can't do that without having dinner there first."

"Babe, I've had dinner at your parents' house before."

"Uh-huh, as my co-worker, my friend and my boss. This is different." I tried to hide a smile.

"Why is this different," Ranger asked, sounding a little nervous.

"Well, according to my grandmother, it's because now my mom's hearing wedding bells." I laughed at the look on Ranger's face.

"Don't worry. I told my mom we were going to continue living in sin to see how it goes and that we hadn't even discussed marriage yet."

"I bet that went over good." At Ranger's remark I mimed crossing myself and rolled my eyes.

Ranger just lifted an eyebrow. "Aren't you worried you'll go to hell for mocking your mother that way?"

I just started laughing again. "After the things we've done together in the last 48 hours, I'd say making fun of my mother is the least of my worries when it comes to my soul."

I walked over and took a fork out of the drawer and picked up the pie Hal had left me. Ranger looked from me to the pie and back at me again.

"What time is dinner?"

"Six," I said, forking in a mouthful of creamy pie.

"Babe, it's almost 5:30."

"I know. I want my dessert first in case we have to make a run for it and I don't get any cake after dinner." I smiled as Ranger gave a soft laugh.

"Want some?" Ranger's eyes darkened, and a small smile tipped up the corners of his mouth as he shook his head slowly.

"No thanks, Babe. I've already had my pie."

I could feel myself blush, and Ranger laughed softly again. Hoping to distract him, I set the fork down and scooped up some whipped cream on my finger and lifted it to Ranger's mouth.

"Just try a little bit. It's good." Ranger leaned forward and sucked my finger into his hot mouth, running his tongue around it. When he pulled back, he looked deeply into my eyes.

"You tasted better." I felt my blush intensify.

"Babe, you just lured me down to the practice range for sex. How can you still be embarrassed by me saying things like that to you?"

"I don't know," I mumbled.

Ranger just looked at me for a minute. "Cute."

"Cute?" My voice was sarcastic.

"Sexy," Ranger growled as he reached for me. "If we didn't have to leave for your parents' house, we'd take that pie into the bedroom and see if we could find a more interesting way to eat dessert."

"No such luck. We can't be one minute late." Fighting disappointment, I stepped away and put the pie in the fridge.

When I turned around, Ranger had his hand held out to me.

"Ready, Babe?" Feeling unusually confident after the success of my seduction of Ranger today, I smiled at him and put my hand in his.

"Ready." I thought to myself that for the first time in a long time I felt like I was ready for anything. Little did I know I'd soon have reason to regret that thought.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Ranger and I were five minutes early. After exchanging a greeting with my father, Grandma Mazur waylaid Ranger and me in the dining room.

"I got me a new man. His name's Arnie. He's an honest to goodness retired army man just like the big guy here. He's joining us for dinner, and I told him I'd show him my gun afterwards. He's really hot for an old coot. He's a few years younger than me, but I need them younger on account of I'm so spry for my age." Ranger and I just looked at each other as we heard my dad mumble something about crazy old woman while he watched the TV.

Before either Ranger or I could come up with a response, the doorbell rang, and Grandma Mazur was off like a shot. She turned to Ranger before opening the door.

"Now, I know it's gonna be hard, but no flirting with me while my new honey pie is here. I have a feeling he's the jealous type, and I don't want you to chase him away before I find out the size of his package. Then I have to find out if he's got any starch left in his --" Grandma Mazur broke off as the doorbell rang again.

I watched as a man about Ranger's height came through the door. I couldn't hide my surprise. The dignified looking man had a full head of gray hair and had the look of a man who'd been handsome in his younger years.

"This here's Arnie. He's a veteran. We met at the Veteran's Dance last weekend. He lost his leg in the war; only he's got one of them fake one's that he can take off. It farts when he walks. He's a little self-conscious about the farting thing, but I told him sometimes a fart slips out of me, and I don't even notice, so everyone would just think it was me." Ranger and I both looked at Arnie. He was shaking his head slightly but, much like I'm used to with Ranger, his lips were tipped up in a small smile.

The man looked over at Ranger. "Waiting for a new one. Every couple of years, as the muscle mass changes, so does the fit of the leg. Real pain in the ass." I watched in shock as grandma's new boyfriend and Ranger exchanged some complicated handshake. I stood with my mouthing hanging open. I couldn't believe that everyone but me could do those cool handshakes, including one of Grandma Mazur's old geezer boyfriends. What the hell is up with that?

"Arnold Walters," he said as he shook Ranger's hand.

"Carlos Manoso. Pleasure to meet you, sir." I was looking back and forth between him and Ranger.

Grandma Mazur spoke up. "Everyone calls him Ranger."

Arnie looked back at Ranger. "Forces?"

"Yes, sir."

"Did you know Bucky Masters?"

Ranger nodded his head once. "Yes, sir. I had the honor of working a few missions with Coronal Masters."

"Hell of a good man."

"He was," Ranger agreed.

"Manoso? Seems I might have heard Bucky mention your name a time or two over a couple of beers." I saw the speculation come into the old man's eyes.

"Yes, sir, I wouldn't doubt it. I know I heard him mention yours." At Ranger's remark Arnie threw his head back and laughed.

"I just bet you did. Real nice to meet you, son."

"Thank you, sir. It's an honor to meet you too."

"Well, ain't that a pip," Grandma Mazur said. "Who would have guessed you two would have mutual friends? It's like one big happy family." I watched as Ranger exchanged a slightly amused look with Arnie.

"And this here's my granddaughter Stephanie. She's a bounty hunter. Sometimes she blows things up and shoots people. She just finished recuperating from being shot by one of her skips. She's Ranger's woman." All eyes were on me.

"I am not _Ranger's woman_. Yeesh, I'm not a toy." Arnie's eyes were twinkling as he reached out and enfolded my hand in his.

"A pleasure to meet you, young lady. Edna's told me a lot about you." I could just imagine what my grandmother had told him about me.

"They're living in sin." I heard my mother gasp behind me. I hadn't seen her come into the room.

"That means they're --"

"Mother, let everyone come in and sit down. The chicken's going to get dry." My mother's words had the effect of a starting gun during the Olympics.

My father hurried to the head of the table and had his fork and knife in his hand before the rest of us had taken our seat. Ten seconds later the chicken hit the table and everyone dug in.

I felt Ranger's lips against my ear as he whispered, "If you _were _my toy, I could take you home and play with you."

I turned and locked eyes with Ranger and whispered back. "You're going to get to do that anyway." I watched as the edges of Ranger's eyes crinkled as if he was thinking about smiling.

Everyone started passing food around, and I noticed Ranger was fighting a grin as my father was passed a bowl of rice. My father stared at if for about 30 seconds as if he had no idea what to do with it before handing it to my mother and reaching for the potatoes. My father understood potatoes.

Arnie was watching Ranger's expression as Ranger watched my dad pile mashed potatoes and gravy onto his plate. Catching Ranger's eye, Arnie looked down at his own helping of the same and then over at Ranger's rice.

"What are you, son, early thirties?"

"Yes, sir," Ranger answered.

"Give it another 30 or 40 years, and you'll appreciate a mountain of mashed potatoes and homemade gravy on your plate. Almost as much as you'll appreciate having a woman you love to share them with. It's one of the things men like us have to look forward to with age." I watched as my father nodded his head while scooping up another mouthful and was shocked. This was the equivalent of another man jumping up and pounding Arnie on the back in camaraderie.

At Ranger's doubtful look, Arnie just laughed again.

"Bet you eat a lot of salad, too." When Ranger's mouth tipped up into an almost smile, Arnie thumped his hand on the table.

"Well, it sure beats the hell out of a daily diet of M.R.E.'s and tree bark."

"Yes, sir, it certainly does," Ranger agreed.

"M.R.E.'s?" My mother sounded puzzled.

"Made Ready to Eat. Rations the military gives their fighting men to eat. Good enough to eat when you're starving, but nothing nearly as good as this lovely meal you've made for us tonight." I looked over and watched as my mother's face lit up at the compliment.

Watching the exchange I finally turned my attention to Grandma Mazur as she leaned over and looked under the table for the third time and saw that Ranger was watching her too. This time a fart slipped out as she leaned over.

"Excuse me." I heard her voice say from under the table.

"Mother, what are you doing?" At the appalled sound of my mother's voice Grandma Mazur started to sit back up. Arnie shifted his leg to give her room to pop her head up, and the leg made a farting sound. We all ignored it and looked at my grandmother.

"I'm just checking out the size of Ranger's --"

"Mother!"

"What? I was just checking out the size of Ranger's feet and comparing them with the size of Arnie's feet. They look close to the same size. You know what they say about the size of a man's feet." Grandma Mazur looked at me and winked, and I could feel my face grow warm as I reached for the bottle of wine in front of me and filled my glass. I felt Ranger's knee nudge mine under the table, but I didn't look at him as I downed the glass of wine.

"So, ah, Ranger --" my mother began.

"You can call me Carlos, ma'am."

"Carlos. Right. Steph tells me you're both going to be having dinner with your family soon."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Does your family speak English," Grandma Mazur asked.

"All except my Grandma Rosa. She speaks Spanish." The table got quiet for a minute as everyone shoveled in food and Grandma Mazur thought about Ranger's answer.

"Maybe I should take a class and learn to speak Spanish if you're going to be part of the family." My mother and I just stared at her, and my father's fork stopped half way to his mouth, but Ranger just took her remark in stride.

"I'm sure my grandmother would appreciate your efforts." Apparently Ranger had chosen to ignore the 'part of the family' remark.

"I wouldn't mind learning a second language. Ella Barnes down at the senior center thinks she's hot cause she knows how to say 'big cock --"

"MOTHER!"

"-- a-doodle-do in Japanese," Grandma Mazur finished innocently, but her eyes were twinkling as she looked at Ranger. I could tell he was fighting a smile.

"Do you think you could teach me how to say big cock --"

At my mother's gasp, she hurried on. "-- a-doodle-do in Spanish?"

"Mother of God," my father said with his mouth full.

Ranger was saved from answering when Arnie suddenly threw back his head and hooted with laughter.

"Isn't she something?" He reached over and covered Grandma Mazur's hand with his own. I goggled as I watched her cheeks flush pink.

Less than a minute later, as my mother set the pineapple upside down cake on the table, I could feel Ranger shaking with silent laughter.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I had my coveted brown bag in my hand filled with pineapple upside down cake as Ranger and I stepped into the elevator at Rangeman. Trying to decide whether I wanted more of it or some of the banana cream pie left over from Hal, my thoughts were interrupted by Ranger's pager. I heard him swear softly as he looked down at the readout.

"Sorry, Babe. Looks like one of our clients has had an attempted break in. Why don't you go on up to the apartment? I'm going to meet Tank on the fifth floor. I'll be home as soon as I can." Ranger pulled me to him and, completely ignoring the security cameras, crushed my mouth in a deep and hot kiss.

"Just a little incentive for you to wait up for me, Babe," he said against my lips when he broke the kiss. I watched as the elevator came to a stop and Ranger stepped off on the fifth floor. Watching his ass as he walked away, I thought maybe I'd just have a slice of pie and cake while I curled up on the couch watching TV and waiting for Ranger to get home.


	15. Chapter 15

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone for your wonderful reviews._

_Thank you to L&S once again for their kindness and patience as well as their encouragement, handholding and occasional butt-kicking._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 15**

The next morning Ranger got up early to head out for a run and a meeting with a client. I woke up to full sunlight and the memory of the soft kiss Ranger had given me before he left. The words 'I love you, Babe' a whisper in the dark.

Climbing out of bed, I took a shower and spent the minimum amount of time getting ready. Lula had called the night before to ask me to help her with a skip today, but I knew she wouldn't be at Vinnie's this early. I figured I'd stop by and pick up doughnuts and hang out with Connie while I was waiting for Lula to stomp in.

It was nine o'clock by the time I fed Rex, grabbed the keys to the Cayenne that Ranger had left in the silver tray for me, and headed out. I stopped by the fifth floor to tell Tank where I was going. When I got to the comp room, Tank and Lester both looked over and got up. I could feel myself getting a little nervous as they both looked at me and started in my direction.

"What," I asked, looking from one to the other.

"Ranger asked Lester and me to spend some time with you this morning working on your self-defense skills." The gleam in Tank's eyes told me he was going to enjoy his new assignment.

"Hun-uh. No way. Ranger didn't say anything about this to me." I started backing toward the exit to the stairs, thinking I might be able to make a run for it.

"Does Ranger look dumb to you, Steph?" Lester started laughing.

"Yeah, he left it to us to fill you in." Tank was now smiling in anticipation.

"I'm not dressed for a work out." The three of us looked down at my clothes. I had on jeans and a t-shirt. Crap.

"Seems to me you're dressed perfect for this. It's not like your skips are going to wait until you change into workout clothes before they attack, white girl." Before I knew it they each had a hold of one of my arms and were steering me toward the gym. Crap, crap and double crap.

"I'm supposed to meet Lula to help with a skip," I said desperately.

"Lula's not even out of bed yet." I looked at Tank. Well, he should know, I guess.

"This is because I stunned you, isn't it?" I glared up at Tank.

"Nope, this is because it's the boss's orders. I'm trying to look at it as a side benefit though." I tried to pull away, but they both just tightened their grip.

Once we were in the gym, Lester turned to me. His expression was serious.

"Look, Stephanie, I don't know how much Ranger's told you, but he's a pretty straight forward man. By now he's told you what being his woman means. You need to do this. There's only so much we all can do to keep you safe. Even less if you're going to insist on being so independent and stubborn." I gave him a pissy look at the 'his woman' remark. When Ranger said it, it sounded sexy and gave me a little thrill, not that I'd admit it. When everyone else said it, it sounded like they were talking about one of Ranger's possessions. I started to say something, but he rushed on, obviously misinterpreting the reason for the look I'd given him.

"Look, we get that you need to be independent. We do. But the fact of the matter is, if you're not going to let us put someone with you 24/7, you have to learn how to defend yourself or at the very least how to buy yourself some time until we can get there to help." Seeing that I was weakening, Lester drove his point home.

"Ranger needs you to do this, Steph, and Ranger rarely needs anything from anyone." At that I took a deep breath.

"Okay, where do we start?"

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX **

Thirty minutes later I was leaned over with my hands on my knees sucking air.

"It's not enough to know what you're doing, Stephanie. You have to anticipate your enemy's next move. Watch his eyes, his body language. If you can't see him, listen to his voice. You have to learn when someone's bluffing and when they're not." I wondered if Lester would know I wasn't bluffing if I threatened to kill him.

Tank walked over and leaned down to look me in the eye. "It's not enough to want to do it, Steph. You have to focus. This isn't fighting over a pair of shoes on sale at the mall. This is survival."

"Hey," I finally panted out, "I've fought over a pair of shoes or two that put my life in jeopardy." By the look on Tank's face it was clear he wasn't in the mood to be amused.

"This is not a joke. You're never going to learn to protect yourself if you don't pay attention and take this seriously. And you're never going to be able to protect someone else. Your partners have to be able to count on you to watch their back. Now, try again."

I stood up and stretched my arms above my head. Taking a deep cleansing breath like they'd taught me, I once again stepped onto the mat.

Another 30 minutes later I was getting frustrated and pissed. I felt like I was making no progress, and all I wanted to do was flip both men off and storm out. Tank called a halt to my lesson with Lester once more and walked over to stand in front of me.

"If your size and strength are a weakness against you, then use your brain. Use words. Use your enemy's emotions against them. Piss them off. Nothing fucks up a person's concentration more than being pissed. It clouds the mind and causes you to act spontaneously. Spontaneous decisions are almost always the wrong ones. Taunt them, fuck with them, question their manhood. Use whatever you have at your disposal. There is no fighting fair when you're fighting for your life. But whatever you do, keep your cool. Do you think Ranger is never pissed? Do you think he never fears, never hates? He feels those emotions just like the next man, but he's learned to overcome them and keep his cool. Always. If he hadn't, he'd be dead by now. And so will you be if you don't start taking these lessons seriously." When the only answer I gave him was a nod of my head, Tank turned back to Lester.

"Again."

Almost two hours after I'd climbed out of it, I was crawling my sore and tired ass back into Ranger's shower, moaning as the hot water ran over my body. I hadn't admitted it to Tank or Lester, but by the time we'd finished I left the gym feeling a little better about the lessons. I'd finally managed to catch Lester off guard enough once to take him to the mat. Considering it was my first lesson, I was feeling pretty good about it despite Tanks 'not bad' comment.

I climbed out of the shower, pulled my hair back into a ponytail, popped a hat on my head and again used a minimum amount of makeup. I was just headed out the door when Lula called. Assuring her I was on my way, I left the apartment. I climbed into the Cayenne and keyed myself out of the garage. First stop doughnuts, I thought to myself. Today I'd earned them.

** XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I walked into the office to find Lula and Connie filing. Their nails, not paperwork.

"Hey, Vinnie," Connie yelled. "Steph's here." The door to Vinnie's inner office opened.

"It's about time. Jeez, next time you get shot, could you try to get shot somewhere that won't keep you off work for nearly 10 weeks? I'm dying here. These low bonds I give you add up, you know?"

I looked at Vinnie, giving him my 'you've got to be freaking kidding me' look. Before I could respond, Lula spoke up.

"Hey, Mr. Nice Guy, you might want to remember she's Batman's woman now on account of I don't think he'd like you being rude to his woman." Yeesh, enough with the "his woman" crap, I thought. What is wrong with these people?

"Ah, excuse me, but what about the fact that _I_ don't like him being rude to me," I asked in a pissed off voice.

"Ranger's more likely to hurt Vinnie. Plus he might stop doing skips for him, and Vinnie wouldn't like that. Would you, Vinnie?" Connie just smiled sweet as syrup as she looked at the man in question.

"Jeez, why couldn't you have just married Morelli? Now I gotta worry if you get shot on a skip I give you my life could be in jeopardy. Everybody knows what he did to that goon of his, Tank, at the hospital when he let you get shot." Everybody but me, I thought, looking over at Lula puzzled.

Seeing the look on her face when Vinnie called her current boyfriend a goon, I decided I better step in before she squished him like a bug and left us all out of a job.

"I'm doing fine, Vinnie. Thank you for asking by the way." I used my best snotty voice.

"Yeah. Yeah. We're all glad you're okay. Now, get out there and get some of these skips cleaned up, will you? Louise is going to kill me if I can't send her on that trip to that health spa she's been nagging me about." We all looked at each other knowing it was Vinnie's father-in-law he was really worried about.

Vinnie looked over at Lula. "This one here is useless without you helping her. I don't know what I'm paying her for." At the look on Lula's face Vinnie slammed his office door and threw the lock before she could charge him like a pissed off rhino.

Lula turned the look on me. "I heard about what you did to my man. Good thing for you all his parts were in working order last night or I woulda been pissed off at you. But seeings how everything worked just fine last night, we're cool. You ready to go haul someone's ass off to jail?"

Relieved that Lula had taken the news about me stunning Tank so well, I smiled. "Yep. I'm ready."

"Hot damn, we're back in business. Let's roll."

Lula and I drove over to Lincoln Drive and parked outside of a white house with brown shutters. The lawn needed mowed, trash was piled up behind the house -- never a good sign for me -- and there was no sign of life behind the curtains.

"Maybe he ain't home," Lula said.

"Probably we should go find out. Vinnie was pretty upset about the backlog at the office."

"Sure, we could do that. You want front or back?" Lula was searching through her purse and pulled out her gun.

"Put that away. We don't even know if he's home yet."

"Just making sure I'm prepared," Lula said as she climbed out of her car.

"We'll both take front. I can't trust you when you take the back. Windows get broken and things get shot. Come on." We both approached the front of the house and knocked. The door was opened on a belch. Lula and I both took a step back as the stench of body odor and alcohol, both new and stale, washed over us.

"Mr. Miller, we're from Vincent Plum's Bond Agency. You missed your court date, and we're here to take you in to reschedule."

The bloodshot eyes blinked against the brightness of the outdoors like they hadn't seen sunlight in days.

"Yeah, ah, sure. Gotta finish my beer and find my shoes though. Can't let my beer get warm. Hate fucking warm beer." It was barely noon and the man's words were so slurred we could barely understand him.

"Why don't you come on in? Just take me a minute." He turned and left the door open for Lula and me to follow him in. Not liking the idea, we both looked at each other.

"You first," I said to Lula.

"Huh-un. I'm just gonna wait out here. I'm sure you missed all this, so I'm gonna let you have all the fun."

"Lula," I hissed, "I'm not going into that house alone."

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not."

"You are, on account of I ain't going in there."

"I'm not."

A male voice finally interrupted us. "Excuse me, ladies, but I'm ready." Lula and I both looked over as Patrick Miller leaned down to tie his shoe. He started to sway, and before we could reach him, he fell on the floor and passed out.

"Shit," Lula said.

Blowing out a breath, I put my hands on my hips. "Well, at least he doesn't weigh much." Personally I loved when my skips passed out drunk. This usually means I won't be rolling in trash today.

Lula and I hauled the passed out Mr. Miller to her firebird and stuffed him in the back seat.

"Shoot, that man stinks to high heaven. It's going to take me a month to get that smell out of my car. Roll your window down." Both Lula and I had our heads hanging out the window trying to keep from gagging at the stench coming from the back seat. We pulled into the parking lot at Trenton PD and hit the buzzer to let them know we had a drop off. My old buddies Eddie and Big Dog pulled in behind us.

Big Dog was laughing. "Man, you two looked like a rottweiler and a poodle with your heads hanging out the window like that." Lula and I just glared at him.

"You want to help us get this guy out of the back seat?" When Eddie and Big Dog approached and leaned into the back of the car, they both jumped back and started gagging.

"What the fuck? Is he dead," Eddie asked.

"Dead drunk," I answered.

"Shit. No wonder you had your heads hanging out the window." Big Dog wasn't laughing now. Looking resigned, he and Eddie finally managed to get the passed out man out of the back seat and were all but dragging him into the building.

Lula looked over at me. "You go on in and get the receipt. I'll just wait for you out here." Everyone knew how Lula felt about cops, so I wasn't the least bit surprised.

"Don't you dare leave me."

"Huh. When have I ever left you stranded," Lula managed to look offended.

"Lula, you always leave me stranded."

"Well, I've changed. I'm turning over a new leaf." I huffed out a breath and headed inside.


	16. Chapter 16

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 16 **

I chatted with the clerk who was getting my bond receipt for me. Her brother had gone to school with my sister Valerie, which meant we were practically family by Burg standards. She handed me the paperwork, and I said goodbye. Backing away from the counter I turned to walk out the door and ran right into a hard chest.

I looked up into a pair of chocolate colored eyes and froze.

"Steph." I knew everyone in the station was watching us and pretending not to.

"Hey, Joe. I didn't know you were here. When did you get back in town?" I forced myself to relax. I knew this day would come, but between being the mistress of denial and being distracted by Ranger, I hadn't let myself think about it. I couldn't believe I hadn't heard through the grapevine that Joe was back in Trenton.

Furious with myself for being caught unprepared, I forced a smile. I watched as Joe tried to match my light tone, but when he returned my smile with one of his own, it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"I just got back last night. Figured I'd check in, see how things are going." As if suddenly aware that he was still gripping my arms, Joe quickly released me and took a step back.

Guilt and regret had me struggling with emotion, and I desperately wished I'd run into Joe anywhere else but the station.

"Well, it's good to see you're back. Um, I should get going. Lula's waiting for me, and I have to get this paperwork back to Vinnie's." I started out into the parking lot to make my escape when Joe's voice stopped me three steps outside the door.

"Lula went pealing out of here as I pulled in."

"Crap." Pissed off at Lula, I couldn't believe her timing.

"So, you're still working for Vinnie?" There was a trace of surprise in Joe's voice.

"Of course, Joe. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, after you almost died, I figured you might have finally realized you're not cut out for that job. Besides, I assumed Manoso would have you working full time for him." I heard the sneer in Joe's voice and anger began to push away the regret I'd been feeling, if not the guilt.

"I like doing the work I do, Joe, and Ranger doesn't try to make my career choices for me. He lets me do that all on my own like a big girl." I sneered right back.

"Career? Christ, is that what you call it? You know what, Stephanie? I hate to break it to you, but you don't have a career. You have a job, and the only reason you won't quit that job is because you're an adrenaline junkie just like that nutcase you're living with." Before I could respond to that outrageous remark, Joe went on.

"You are living with him now, aren't you?"

"Yes, Joe, I'm living with Carlos, and just because you don't approve of his lifestyle doesn't make him a nutcase."

"Carlos? So now that you're sleeping with him you get the privilege of using his real name, huh? You must feel honored. Of course, it would probably seem strange calling out 'Ranger' during sex."

Joe's words made me flinch as if he'd struck me. Normally I would have freaked out at that point, but I didn't say anything to defend myself. I figured he had a right to be angry and bitter towards me, but I couldn't stop the hurt that welled up inside me.

"If you're done, I'm leaving. I may have hurt you, Joe, and maybe I deserved that, but that doesn't mean I have to stick around for more." More sad than angry, I turned around and pulled out my cell phone to call Tank or Ranger for a ride back to Vinnie's.

"I'm sorry, Steph. I thought I'd dealt with this. I thought I'd begun to put this behind me. I wasn't prepared to run into you this way so soon." I turned and faced him.

"I never meant to hurt you, Joe. I swear I didn't." I stood perfectly still as Joe ran his hand over my hair. Realizing what he'd done, he dropped his hand and gave me a sad smile.

"Sorry. Old habits. At least I didn't try to look down your shirt."

At his remark I gave him a small smile.

"I should go now."

"All right. I guess I'll be seeing you around, Cupcake." I could tell Joe was reluctant to part ways.

"Yeah. Take care of yourself, Joe." I once again opened my phone.

"Hey, Steph. Why don't I run you by to pick up your car? Then maybe we could grab a pizza or some subs." At my shocked look, he hurried on.

"Look, it would probably do us both good to talk about this. We're going to run into each other, and I don't want it to be this awkward every time we do. I care about you, and I was kind of hoping we could find a way to stay friends."

I felt a mixture of relief and apprehension at the invitation. I wanted to remain friends with Joe, but I couldn't help but wonder if it was too soon. Seeing the hopefulness on his face, I gave in.

"Sure. I could go for a sub."

Joe drove me over to Vinnie's, and I followed him to Pino's. When we walked in together the place was loud and crowded with off duty Trenton cops. Half of them yelled a hello or tried to engage us in conversation. All of them tried to hide the speculation that gleamed in their eyes.

I wondered if Joe was feeling as uncomfortable as I was. When we finally worked our way to the bar to order our food my question was answered.

"Why don't we take this back to my place? I feel like every eye in the place is on us. We'll have to talk in whispers if we don't want our every word spread all over Trenton by the end of the day."

I mentally cracked my knuckles as Joe waited for an answer. If the roles had been reversed and I was living with Joe and Ranger had asked me that question, I wouldn't have hesitated, but my relationship with Ranger was new. I wasn't sure how he'd feel about my having dinner at Joe's.

"Stephanie, it's dinner, not hot monkey sex. Or has Manoso forbidden you to be alone with me?"

Throwing him my pissed off Burg girl look I spat out, "Ranger doesn't try to forbid me to do anything, Joe. That was your thing."

"Before we give this entire place any more to talk about, I'll apologize. What's the matter, Steph? Afraid you won't be able to keep your hands off me?" At Joe's smile, I gave up and laughed. After all, like he said, it was just food and beer. Besides, it would give me a chance to see Bob.

Joe insisted I ride with him, promising to bring me back to my car whenever I wanted him to.

"Do you really want your car sitting in my driveway for a couple hours for everyone driving by to see?" I blew out a breath.

"Fine. Let's go." On the way to Joe's I tried calling Ranger, but his voice mail picked up. I left a message that I was safe and that I'd be home later. I called Tank and told him I was going offline for a couple hours, and I turned off my GPS unit. It felt awkward knowing everyone at Rangeman would be aware that I was at Joe's and how long I stayed.

Joe opened his front door, and Bob came charging at me. His bulky body clipped my legs nearly sending me sprawling to the floor. Joe wrapped his arm around me to steady me, and I quickly pulled away, leaning down to hug Bob.

We walked into the kitchen, and I immediately regretted coming here. There were too many memories of shared dinners and breakfasts with Joe here while I was living with him, and it felt awkward. I wasn't sure how to start our conversation. I could tell by the way Joe looked at me that he knew what I was thinking.

"I've missed you, Cupcake." I watched as Joe's eyes turned to a warm chocolate color. This was not a good sign.

"Joe, don't," I pleaded with him.

"Don't what? Tell you that I miss you? Why? Is that not allowed? Am I not supposed to miss you?"

"Joe, I couldn't feel any worse than I do about how this all happened. I hope you know that I wish I hadn't hurt you."

At Joe's humorless laugh I found out I could feel worse.

"Hurt me? Do you have any idea what it was like for me to stand there and hear the woman I thought I was going to marry some day tell another man she was in love with him? Do you have any idea how it felt to have an audience when you did? All those times I asked what was going on between you and Manoso if you had said one word, Steph, one goddamn word about how you felt about him, I would have walked away sooner."

"Joe, you and I were broken up before I got shot."

"So the fuck what, Stephanie. We were always breaking up. We always got back together."

"Maybe that should have told us both something."

"Like what? That every couple of months you needed to break up with me so you could fuck Manoso without feeling guilty?" Joe had begun pacing around the room, gesturing with his hands, his voice loud enough to send Bob looking for cover.

"I never cheated on you with Ranger, Joe. Not once." I was doing my best not to start screaming back at him. I knew we had to clear the air if we were ever going to salvage any kind of friendship, and I was honest enough to know Joe had a right to his anger. The problem is I was starting to realize it was too soon for Joe and me to attempt a reasonable conversation.

"Do you really expect me to believe that now?" Joe looked at me incredulously.

"You're going to think what you want to think, and right at this moment I don't really give a fuck what you believe, Joe. Now, I want to leave. Don't bother coming with me. I'll get a ride." I turned and walked to the front door.

"Fuck. Shit, Steph. Wait. Wait a goddamn minute. I'm sorry. Look, I'm sorry. Don't leave yet." Joe had walked up behind me. When he spun me around I lost my balance and fell back against the wall. In a heartbeat Joe leaned into my body, and his mouth lowered to cover mine. The second his lips made contact I slammed my foot down hard on the inside of his. Taking advantage of his yelp of pain, I squirmed loose.

"What the fuck," Joe yelled.

"That was despicable," I yelled back.

"Despicable? I see. Did you tell Manoso he was despicable every time he tried moving in on me, Steph?

I didn't answer. I didn't know what to say. The truth was that I had not only allowed Ranger to kiss me while I was with Joe, I had kissed him back.

"You can't blame me for trying," Joe said. I wanted to. I wanted to hate him for the way he was acting, but I couldn't. Seeing my face, Joe again looked down at his feet. After a couple of seconds, he looked back up.

"Okay. Okay. Look, no hands. Don't come unglued. I had to try." At my silence he changed tactics.

"Hey, we'll eat our subs, and I won't touch you. When we're done, I'll take you back to Pino's to get your car." I struggled with indecision.

"I meant it when I said I want us to be friends. I know I haven't acted like it, but I do. Come on. We'll watch some TV and eat dinner. I promise I won't even try to lure you into the garage to play choo-choo."

Finally I gave in and followed him into the kitchen. He grabbed us each a beer from the fridge and some napkins, and I carried in the food that was now almost cold. When we were settled on opposite ends of the couch, Joe looked at me.

"So, is he going to marry you?"

"Shit, Joe."

"Hey, I'm just asking."

"Maybe you should be asking if I'm going to marry him. Besides, it's a little soon to be thinking about that; don't you think?"

"Has he asked you?"

"No." I said. And that was true. The fact that Ranger had asked me if marriage was what I needed was not the same as asking me to marry him.

"Do you honestly think he ever will?"

"That's my business, Joe. Besides, I don't know if marriage is what I want. I don't know if it will ever be."

"Well, at least that's something. I'm glad I wasn't the only reason you wouldn't get married. I guess that means it really is his turn, huh? Poor dumb bastard." At my glare, Joe just laughed and turned the TV up.

Half way through the movie Joe looked over at me. "So, what do you know about that cute new girl working at the Tasty Pastry? Think she'd sell me some cannoli?" When I started laughing, Joe just grinned and took another swig of his beer.

When the movie was over, Joe and I took Bob for a walk and then he drove me back to Pino's. Nothing more had been said about Ranger and me. As I crawled out of the car I thought maybe, just maybe, Joe and I might actually be able to be friends. Who would have ever believed it?


	17. Chapter 17

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 17**

I let myself into the apartment and threw my keys in the dish inside the door. I blew out a breath. I was glad to have gotten through that first awkward meeting with Joe. His roller coaster behavior of nice to angry and back again had left me tired and emotionally spent. All I wanted was to feel Ranger's arms around me. I turned to walk to the kitchen and nearly keeled over.

Ranger was sitting in one of the chairs at the table, facing me. He was slightly slouched, but he unfolded himself and stood as I walked toward the kitchen. I had done nothing wrong, but the anger radiating off of him was making me feel guilty and nervous.

Trying to act casual I continued to the kitchen and opened the cupboard to take out the box of pastries there. I pretended to be considering my options in order to buy myself some time to calm down. I was barely able to stifle a gasp as Ranger's hand settled on the back of my neck. He leaned around me and took out the box of Tastykakes. He set them on the counter in front of me and stepped back.

When I turned around Ranger was leaning back against the counter a few feet away from me with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Where were you," Ranger asked. He was watching me closely, his face unreadable.

Seeing no reason to lie, I told him. "I grabbed dinner with Joe." I caught a flicker of something in his eyes that was there and gone, but not before I got the message that I should be very wary. This was not the Ranger that had kissed me gently before walking out the door this morning.

"You turned off your GPS." Ranger's voice was controlled. Too controlled.

"I tried your cell first, but you didn't answer. I left you a message. I even called Tank just like I'm supposed to." I was trying to stay calm, but I had a feeling Ranger wasn't in the mood to be reasonable.

"Where'd you go for dinner?" Now, here's the thing. If I were having this conversation with Morelli, I'd just tell him. Then Joe would rant and rave and throw his arms around as he had earlier, and I'd yell back and then we'd go upstairs and have make-up sex or else I'd storm back to my apartment and we wouldn't speak for several weeks. I had no experience dealing with Ranger's jealousy, and I had no idea what to expect. I wasn't even sure it was jealousy I was dealing with.

When I didn't answer right away, Ranger just raised an eyebrow.

"We needed to talk. We didn't want every word we said overheard and gossiped about, so we picked up subs at Pino's and went back to Joe's." Ranger gave no flicker of eye, no change of expression or body language, no verbal response. Fine, I thought in denial. That was easy. I took a Tastykake and turned to walk out of the kitchen. Ranger pushed himself away from the counter and closed the short distance between us. When he stopped in front of me, he was close enough that I could feel the heat from his body.

I tipped my head back to meet Ranger's eyes. "What exactly is the problem here?"

Ranger backed me up against the refrigerator and molded his body to mine, placing his hands on either side of my head.

"There's no problem, Babe," Ranger said as he leaned down to kiss my neck. The Tastykake fell from my limp fingers, and I closed my eyes as I felt Ranger's mouth place wet kisses up the side of my neck. Moving his mouth up my neck, his hot tongue traced the shell of my ear, causing me to shiver. I bit back a moan as he shifted against me.

"But if I find out that Morelli has put his mouth or his hands on you, I'll have to kill him." Ranger's voice had been totally conversational as if he were telling me if it rained, I should take an umbrella, but I felt like someone had thrown a bucket of ice water on me.

I immediately wedged my hands between us and pushed. Ranger stayed where he was for a moment, letting me know that if he didn't want to move nothing I did was going to move him. When he finally eased back and stepped away, I pushed my way past him and walked into the living room.

It took me a minute to find my voice. "What the hell are you saying, Ranger? You think I went to Joe's to cheat on you?" I was hurt that he could think that after the way we'd spent the last few days.

"No, I don't. I just see no reason for you to be alone with Morelli at his house." Ranger never raised his voice, but I could feel the force of his personality slamming up against my own.

"You don't trust me," I said in disbelief.

"If I didn't trust you completely, Babe, you wouldn't be here." I was angry at Ranger for his unreasonable jealousy, and I was feeling guilty because I knew Ranger was right to question Joe's actions by the way Joe had tried to kiss me tonight.

"Ranger, you and I used to be alone together all the time and nothing happened." I watched as Ranger merely raised his eyebrows slightly. I was exhausted, and all I wanted to do was crawl into bed and cover my head. My stomach hurt at the idea that maybe my mother was right and Ranger and I had moved too quickly.

"Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe this isn't going to work." For a split second I caught a flash of something in Ranger's expression that might have been regret.

"If that's what you want, Babe."

"What I want? What the hell does what I want have to do with it? It's never been about what I want, not with Joe and not with you. It's always been about what I'm willing to settle for and what the two of you might feel like throwing my way."

"Right now we're talking about what I'm willing to settle for, Stephanie. And I'm not willing to settle for you running over and having a cozy dinner for two alone at Morelli's. That might have worked for him, but I warned you once before I'm not as understanding as he is."

I continued on as if I hadn't heard him.

"What I want is to be in a relationship where the man I'm with doesn't think I'm off fucking someone else the minute his back's turned. You of all people ought to know first hand I don't work that way, and it's insulting for you to think I would."

"I'm talking about Morelli's intentions, not yours. Are you going to stand here and tell me he didn't try to move in on me while you were alone with him having subs?" I could have lied, but Ranger would have known it as soon as I did, so I avoided answering the question.

"I'm tired, and this conversation is ridiculous. You knew I was going to have to talk to Joe about this sooner or later. I'm not up to fighting with you about it. I'm going to stay with my parents tonight. You can let me know when you're ready to be reasonable about this." I stomped to the bedroom to throw some things in a bag, unaware that Ranger had followed me.

"No." I jumped at Ranger's voice behind me.

"Excuse me?" I turned around to see Ranger leaning against the doorjamb.

"You're not going anywhere." I just gaped at Ranger. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"We're not married, Ranger. You have no right to tell me where I can go." I turned back to continue throwing clothes in my backpack.

"Is that all it takes to get you to finish an argument instead of storming off without resolving anything? Fine, we'll do it your way." I watched in shock as Ranger pulled out his phone and dialed.

"Get me two tickets to Vegas. Stephanie and I are getting married. I don't know when. Leave them open-ended, and I'll let you know. Thank you. I'll tell her." My mouth was hanging open by the time Ranger hung up.

"Tank said to give you his best wishes, Babe." For a minute I just stood there with my mouth hanging open.

"Ranger, I am not flying to Las Vegas to marry you just because you think that would give you the right to control me."

"I have no desire to control you, Babe. I know better than to try. This is about making it clear to Morelli that you're mine now, keeping you in my life and making your mother happy all at the same time."

"If you think I'm going to marry you just so you can prove to another man that I'm yours, you're crazy." I was yelling, but inside it felt like my heart was breaking. I had done nothing wrong, but a part of me wanted to apologize just so Ranger would take me in his arms. How had everything gone so wrong here?

"You're the one that brought up the fact that we're not married, Steph. I'm just trying to give you what you need."

Suddenly all of the anger drained out of me, leaving me feeling shaky and sad.

"Let me see if I understand you. You want me to fly to Vegas with you and get married so you can, one, prove to another man that I belong to you; two, keep me here; and, three, make my mother happy? Do I have that right, Carlos?" For the first time since I'd walked through the apartment door, I saw uncertainty on Ranger's face.

"I see. I guess I should be flattered, but I think I'll have to pass." I leaned down to pick up the clothes that I had dropped on the floor without realizing it. Mustering every ounce of dignity I had I fought back tears and looked at Ranger when I straightened up.

"This isn't like you, Ranger. Why are you acting this way?" I held up my hand as my voice broke.

When Ranger pushed away from the doorjamb and took a step toward me, I hissed at him. "Don't you dare touch me now."

I tossed the clothes onto the bed and walked past Ranger without looking at his face. I stopped when I got to the living room window and stared out at the fading light, swamped with misery now that my anger was gone.

Minutes later I felt Ranger's hand settle gently on my back. I stiffened but didn't pull away. Slowly he began running his hand up and down my back. The gentleness of that caress set loose the hurt and frustration inside of me, and I couldn't hold back the tears that started rolling down my cheeks.

Ranger turned me and took me into his arms. For the longest time he just held me, letting my tears wash over his skin. I felt him place a kiss on the top of my head, and when I heard his whispered, "Babe," I completely fell apart and the tears turned to sobs. Ranger lifted me in his arms and held me close. I barely noticed as he walked over and sat on the couch cradling me in his arms.

Ranger let me cry myself out. When my sobbing had quieted to the occasional hiccup, he pushed my damp hair back from my face. "I'm sorry, Steph. I was out of line."

I didn't know what to say. It was barely after six o'clock, and I was emotionally wiped out and exhausted. I just wanted to forget everything Ranger and Joe had said to me today, climb under the covers and go to sleep.

"I know I hurt you. I have no excuse for it. If you want to leave, I won't stop you, Babe."

I was still hurt by Ranger's behavior tonight and the things that he'd said, but I loved him, and I didn't want to leave him. I couldn't bear to have things end abruptly this way. I thought about all the times I'd reacted unreasonably to Joe's working relationship with Terry Gilman. Then I thought of all the times Joe had flipped out over mine with Ranger. It finally occurred to me that the reason this seemed so much worse was because Ranger rarely became angry, and I'd never seen him act jealous like a normal human being.

I thought about what Tank had said this morning about Ranger feeling emotions just like any other man, and I realized that I was asking more from him than I did from anyone else. I raised my arms around Ranger's neck and lifted my face to his.

When Ranger's mouth met mine, the kiss was soft and comforting. Long after the room had gone dark, Ranger held me in his arms telling me how much he loved me and how sorry he was that he'd been a fool.

"I wish I could promise you it will never happen again, Babe, but I can't. I've never had this reaction to any woman in my life. I can promise you I'll try not to do anything so stupid in the future." Knowing I couldn't really ask for more than that, I put my hand on the side of Ranger's face and placed my lips against his.

Ranger got up and turned on the light, and I went to the bathroom to wash my face. I came back into the living room, and he was sitting on the couch. When he held out his hand, I walked over and sat beside him. Instead of taking me to bed for makeup sex like Joe would have done, Ranger simply held me, turning our bodies so that we were lying down on the couch.

We turned on the T.V. and watched the rest of a game that was on. As I allowed Ranger's soft caresses and whispered words ease the rawness I'd been feeling inside, for the first time I let myself truly believe we could make this work.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX 

The sound of my own moan woke me from a deep sleep. The feel of Ranger's mouth gently working its way down my body made me go from sleepy to needy with a smooth shift of gears. Before my mind had completely cleared Ranger had slid me quietly over the edge. When he moved back up my body, his eyes locked on my still blurry ones as he slid into me. The gentle rhythm Ranger set slowly built the tension inside me once again. Locked together, never taking our eyes off one another, we both let the wave carry us under together.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX 

Ella had already come and gone by the time I'd showered and dressed. I walked out to find Ranger sitting at the table. He held his hand out to me as I came into the room, and when I placed my hand in his, he gently pulled me down onto his lap.

"I want to apologize again for the things I said last night. I had no right to behave that way. I'm a hard man, Steph. I don't cry at sad movies, and I don't laugh at everything I think is funny. I certainly don't allow myself to let non-productive emotions like jealousy rule my actions. I have no excuse for the things I said to you. The fact is I do trust you. As much as anyone I know. I'd never purposely try to control you, and I'm not proud of making you think that's what I wanted to do."

"Ranger," I began, "I understand. Every couple has arguments. I'll admit at first I was shocked, but that's just because I'm not used to you acting like the rest of us humans." I let myself smile at him, because I thought he could use it.

"You're not a hard man, and if you are, it's only because obviously you've had to be." I reached up and stroked my fingers gently across Ranger's forehead.

"I love you. I knew it was a bad idea to go to Joe's. I just wanted an opportunity to apologize to him and try to find a way to remain friends with him."

"And?"

"And I think maybe in time we can, but we both agreed maybe it's a little too soon. Deep down he's still angry with me and has every right to be." I could tell by Ranger's expression he didn't agree with me.

"It doesn't matter right now. Eventually I think things will be fine. I'm glad that that first awkward meeting with him is behind us. I just wish I had handled the whole thing better."

"Don't beat yourself up, Babe. You didn't do anything wrong. You don't have to take on the burden of guilt for my own stupidity. You take on enough from everyone else."

I looked at Ranger's face intently. "Can I ask you something?"

"Babe."

"Would you really have taken me to Vegas to get married just to prove something to Joe and to make my mother happy?" I finally asked the question that had been plaguing me.

"You left out the part about marrying you to keep you in my life. The fact is ever since you were lying in the hospital bed after you were shot I keep asking myself why we shouldn't just get married. You love me. I love you. I guess a part of me last night was looking for an excuse to force your hand into marrying me."

"But why? I didn't think you'd ever be one to want to rush into marriage."

I watched as a baffled look crossed Ranger's face. "The longer I waited for you to come home yesterday, the more I realized that one screw up by me and you could be gone. Morelli would take you back, and we all know it. I starting thinking to myself that if we were married it would take more than an argument to send you running back to him." Ranger felt me stiffen at the insult and tightened his arms around me.

"I knew I wasn't being fair to you. I wasn't giving you enough credit, and I'm sorry about that. I'm not used to being ruled by my emotions, and I didn't like it, and I ended up taking it out on you."

"It's all right. I think I understand, but you need to know that even if things don't work out between us, I won't go back to Joe. I know now that I don't love him enough to have a future with him. Not the kind of love that marriage and a family should be built on. I promise the next time you screw up I won't go running away. I realize now that's exactly what I've always done with Joe, exactly what I started to do to you last night. I don't want to run away from what we have. I love you."

"I love you too, Babe. And since you're being so forgiving, now might be a good time to tell you that I told my mother we'd be over for dinner tonight." Every thought went flying out the window as I hopped off of Ranger's lap.

"Tonight?" I nearly screeched at him.

"Babe." I looked at him like he was an idiot.

"Ranger, you can't just give me a couple hours' notice that we're going to have dinner with your family tonight." I watched as the corners of Ranger's mouth tipped up.

"I figured you'd have less time to stress about it. Sort of like your lesson yesterday morning with Lester and Tank. And it's Carlos, Babe." I narrowed my eyes at Ranger and put my hands on my hips, but before I could say anything Ranger's pager went off.

"I have to go. The guys are waiting for you downstairs for your next lesson." Ranger just laughed when I gave him the finger. He walked toward me, fisted his hand in the front of my shirt and lifted me to my toes as his mouth covered mine in a hungry kiss. When his tongue touched mine I nearly forgot all about being angry and wrapped my arms around his neck deepening the kiss.

When Ranger finally released me he lifted his hand to tuck a stray curl behind my ear.

"How's lunch sound if I can make it?"

"Lunch sounds great, but I might have to go shopping to find something to wear for dinner. I'll call and let you know."

"Steph, you don't need a new outfit for dinner with my family. It's a casual family dinner."

"Easy for you to say." Ranger's pager went off again. With one last kiss he started toward the door.

"Carlos?" I watched as Ranger turned back toward me.

"Yeah, Babe."

"You wanted me to tell you how I felt about marriage, and I told you the reasons why I'm not sure it's the right move for me. You still haven't told me your feelings and the reasons for them yet." I watched as Ranger's blank mask moved back across his face.

"We'll get to it, Babe. Soon, I promise." Holding my eyes for a minute longer, Ranger finally turned and walked out of the apartment closing the door quietly behind him.


	18. Chapter 18

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, and Spoilers for all 13._

_DISCLAIMER: I just want to say that although there is a reference in this chapter about spanking a child, I obviously **do not **condone the abuse of children in any way. I know parents who believe in spanking children and parents who do not. Because I have no children of my own, I do not feel qualified in forming an opinion on the matter. I have been present when parents have had heated discussions about the topic, and I keep my mouth shut because of my lack of experience in the matter. The context of the topic here is just meant to have a little fun with the characters._

**Learning about love – Chapter 18**

After Ranger left I threw on some comfortable sweats and a t-shirt and went down for my lesson with Tank and Lester. Considering I managed to get Lester to the matt twice in under an hour, I was feeling pretty proud of myself.

With their words of advice on how to handle the enemy and how to find my own personal zone still ringing in my ears I climbed into the shower. After quickly getting ready, I took off to meet Lula. We managed to bring in two more of Vinnie's skips, and I'd managed to come out of both of them with no more than a grass stain on the knee of my jeans. Taking this as a positive sign that my lessons with Tank and Lester were starting to sink in, I pulled out my phone as it started to ring.

Seeing it was Ranger, I quickly answered.

"Yo," I said, smiling.

"Yo, yourself, Babe."

"I just finished up a skip with Lula and thought I'd head back to the apartment, but I wouldn't mind grabbing lunch first." There was a pause as I heard Ranger say something to someone in the background.

"I'm going to have to take a rain check on lunch. I've run into a snag here. As a matter of fact, if we can't clear this up, I might have to go out of town for a couple of days to work out some details."

"Can you tell me what's going on?" I felt my stomach tighten at the silence on the other end of the phone. I took a deep breath, trying to remind myself that Ranger and I both needed to learn to compromise.

"Will you be back in time for dinner with your family tonight?" As much as I tried, I couldn't keep the disappointment out of my voice.

I heard Ranger's soft sigh come through the phone. "I'll be there to pick you up by 5:00. I've got to go, Babe. I love you."

"I love you to, Carlos." I'd barely gotten the words out when I heard the sound of Ranger disconnecting.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Ranger got home with barely enough time to shower and change clothes. He'd pulled me to him for a hard kiss when he'd walked in the door, told me I looked great and hurried to the bathroom.

Living with Ranger had given me a new perspective. I'd never thought of him having to rush home and get ready for dinner with his family before. As many times as I had done it, it never occurred to me that he might occasionally have to. While I waited for Ranger to shower and get ready, I couldn't help but wonder how many other normal things Ranger did that I had never taken time to consider. I'd always seen him as a superhero that never worried about mundane things like being late.

When Ranger came out of the bedroom he grabbed my hand, picked up the keys he'd thrown in the tray when he'd walked in, and hurried me down to the car. He hadn't said much on the way to his parent's home, and I could tell he was in his zone. Since I'd never been particularly successful at penetrating his zone with conversation, I decided to keep quiet and worry about meeting his family.

Instantly, as if using his ESP, Ranger spoke. "Don't worry, Babe. Everything's going to be fine." I just nodded my head. A few minutes later Ranger was ushering me up the sidewalk that divided a neatly kept lawn, to a pretty white house with dark blue shutters. The woman who met us at the door had a beautiful face that had aged well with time, dark brown eyes that told me instantly where Ranger had gotten his, and a friendly smile that immediately put me at ease.

"Mama," Ranger said as he leaned down to kiss his mother's cheek. "I'd like you to meet Stephanie Plum." I tried not to be embarrassed as I heard the unspoken 'my woman' in his voice.

"Welcome, Stephanie. Come in. I am happy to welcome you to our home."

I looked down at the woman who stood no taller than 5'5", surprised when she held out both hands to me. Taking both of my hands in hers, Ranger's mother leaned up and gave me a peck on the cheek and then led me into what appeared to be a family room where I counted three men, five women and several children of both sexes.

My head spun as I tried to remember all the names. There was Ranger's father, brother and brother-in-law as well as four sisters and a sister-in-law. I'd pretty much given up by the time we got to his nieces and nephews. I was beginning to feel a little overwhelmed when Ranger took my hand and led me over to a rocking chair in the corner of the room where an old lady sat quietly watching me with steady eyes.

"Stephanie, this is my Grandma Rosa." I watched in wonder as Ranger knelt down and gave his grandmother a gentle but warm kiss on the mouth.

"Hola, abuela. Este es Stephanie." When Ranger said my name, I smiled at the elderly woman and took the hand she held out to me. There was something about the way she looked at me that immediately made me feel like she was looking into my soul. I watched as she turned my hand in hers and looked at my palm. When she looked back up, her eyes searched my face slowly. After a couple of minutes of Ranger and me waiting, she took Ranger's hand with her free hand and looked into his eyes.

"Tu mujer tiene una cara hermosa y un corazon leal y hermosa. Puedo ver esto en ella los ojos. Has elegido bien, nieto." (_Your woman has a beautiful face and a loyal and beautiful heart. I can see this in her eyes. You have chosen well, grandson._)

I didn't understand what Ranger's grandmother had said, but the look in his eyes and the sound of approval from his family behind us told me that Ranger was happy with her words.

Giving my hand one last squeeze Grandma Rosa released my hand and spoke in rapid Spanish to Ranger's mother.

"Si, mama," Ranger's mother answered.

"Come, Stephanie, you will please help me finish dinner. Yes?" I looked at Ranger, and he gave me a smile of encouragement and gently turned me in the direction of the kitchen. I looked over my shoulder one last time and saw him smack his brother in the back of the head as he headed toward an empty overstuffed chair. I was shocked until I saw one of his sisters put her foot out in an attempt to trip Ranger as he crossed the living room floor. As I followed Ranger's mother into the kitchen I could hear laughter break out followed by a loud thump.

Seeing the look on my face, Ranger's mother just smiled.

"Do not worry. My children, they always rough house and smack each other. It is one of the ways they show affection. They have never grown out of it. When they were children I often wondered if one of them would kill the other before they became adults." I had to smile. I couldn't imagine the kind of childhood where siblings beat each other up, but I could imagine Ranger being that kind of child.

I looked around the kitchen at the pots and pans simmering on the stove and felt completely out of my element. "Please, Stephanie, do not worry. I only asked you to help me so that we might be able to talk. We would never have had two minutes alone otherwise with that rowdy bunch out there. Make yourself at home. Dinner will finish itself now, and all we will need to do is carry it to the table." Feeling relieved, I leaned against one of the beautiful marble top counters.

"I never thought I'd ever actually get to meet Ranger -- I mean Carlos's family." I could feel my face get warm at my slip of the tongue.

"It is okay that you call him Ranger sometimes. You work with him, yes?"

"Yes, I do."

"Then that is the name you know him by most, and it is natural that that is how you think of him. However, here, in our family home, both Carlos and I prefer that his work be left at the door. I love my son very much, Stephanie, but it is not easy seeing the coolness that he carries with him like a shield. I believe a mother always sees her children as the sweet and innocent child she raised. My son lost his innocence on these very streets. Any that he left here with, the army burned out of him. Do not misunderstand me. I am very proud of the man my son has become, and I am very proud that he chose to serve his country. Still, it makes me sad to see him hold so much of himself back from people." I didn't know what to say, so I waited for Ranger's mom to continue. I was shocked by her next words.

"While we are alone, Stephanie, I would like to thank you."

"Thank me? I don't understand."

"My Carlos has been to see his father and me several times over the last couple of weeks. You have brought out the gentleness that was still buried somewhere inside him. He is happier and more content than I have ever seen him, and we have you to thank for that."

"I love him. I never thought I'd be able to say that so easily. I love Carlos, Mrs. Manoso. I don't know exactly where we're going from here, but I know that I can't imagine living without him."

"Well, you are both intelligent, independent and, from what I can tell, fiercely loyal people. You will figure it out in your own time. I know that my Carlos has never been able to be rushed or told how to make up his mind. I have a feeling your mother would say the same of you."

I laughed at that, "Oh, I'm sure she'd have much more than that to say."

Ranger's mom nodded her head in understanding. "It is an admirable combination even if it does mean that it causes you both to be very stubborn, I am sure." When I couldn't think of an answer immediately, Mrs. Manoso just looked at me.

"You know, I have seen you before today."

"You have?" I searched my mind, trying to remember when I might have met Ranger's mother.

"Yes. The night you were shot Carlos called me. He said, 'Mama, I need your help.' Well, I can tell you I felt my heart stop. All I could think was that he was hurt or sick. I can't even remember the last time my son has asked me for my help at anything." I watched as Ranger's mother's eyes misted over. She then turned back to the stove.

"I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that he was fine but that he was at the hospital. He told me that the woman he cared about had been shot. He said that you had been in surgery for a very long time and that you were still in recovery. The doctor had told him that you should be fine as long as there were no complications with the damage they had to repair around your lung." I was shocked as I watched Mrs. Manoso efficiently place food into serving dishes. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"I was so thrilled to know that my baby had finally opened his heart enough to let someone special in. I knew whoever the woman was that had gotten past all of the walls Carlos has put up around himself over the years had to be someone very very special." I felt myself getting embarrassed as she turned and watched me closely.

"Oh, you and my Carlos are so much alike. He is not good with talking about his feelings either." She gave a small laugh and a little wave of her delicate hand, a hand that was currently putting together an eight-course meal like a general executing a battle.

She spoke again, startling me out of my thoughts. "When he called me, I could hear the fear in his voice. He sounded like a man who was barely hanging onto his composure. This is not a side of my son I normally see. Then he told me your name and he asked me if I would call the family and ask them all to pray for you." Ranger's mom stopped and put one hand on the counter as if to steady herself and lifted the other to dash a tear off her face.

She took a deep steadying breath and continued. "His voice broke when he said your name, and I had to sit down. I knew right then and there, in the way only a mother can, that my son had found his match, the one he would spend his life with, and I was overcome with such love and gratitude for this unknown woman. For you." Ranger's mom again stopped. This time I waited as this wonderful woman struggled to regain her composure.

"Oh, I had almost lost hope that Carlos would ever find that kind of happiness. It broke my heart thinking of my child spending his life alone, taking solace only in his work. I had prayed and prayed for this day and so, of course, I would pray for this Stephanie Plum that I had heard my son and his friends mention from time to time, and I would ask God to please keep this woman safe and to give my son the strength to get through this difficult time." I wasn't much on crying in front of strangers, but now I could feel my own tears as they stung the back of my eyes. I blinked furiously to keep them from falling. Mrs. Manoso didn't look the least embarrassed by my show of emotion, she simply handed me a napkin and kept one for herself.

"And so I told him how much I loved him and assured him that I would call everyone as soon as we hung up, and then I told him to get himself back inside and to sit with you and let God know his true heart so that he might know how much you were needed here with us. He thanked me and hung up. I immediately started calling all of the family including Carlos's Grandma Rosa who promised to go to mass first thing in the morning as well." It appeared that she had finished. I swallowed the lump of emotion blocking my throat and asked her what was on my mind.

"I don't understand. You said you had seen me before today?" All she had said was that she'd talked to Ranger.

"Yes, of course. Carlos called me the next day when they moved you out of I.C.U. He wanted me to know that you were doing better, and to thank me again. I assured him that it had been my pleasure and that we would continue to pray for your quick and complete recovery." Now she turned and gave me a full smile, and in that instant I knew where Ranger had gotten his 200-watt smile from.

Looking like she was telling a secret her eyes twinkled as she spoke once more. "Later that night my daughter Celia and I snuck up to your room. I admit we were dying of curiosity. It was after visiting hours were over, but Celia went to school with one of the head nurses who worked on your floor. Once we assured her we simply wanted to poke our heads in and then leave without disturbing anyone, she led us to your room. I think she has a romantic heart, and Celia knew how to use that to our advantage. We tiptoed in and saw you there in that bed in one of those horrible hospital gowns. Carlos was sitting next to you. He held your hand in his. His head was resting against your leg, and his eyes were closed. We both stood there for a minute or two. I could see that you had a very beautiful face, Stephanie, but I must confess I couldn't wait to meet you and see what you're character was like. Now that I have, I am even more grateful to you. We are very blessed to have you as part of our family." Astonished by Mrs. Manoso's words and her complete acceptance of me, I was momentarily speechless. When I found my voice, I tried to carefully word my response.

"Mrs. Manoso --"

"You must call me Ana. And when you marry my Carlos, you will call me mama as all my children do."

"Missus -- Ana, I am honored to be welcome in your home. I don't have the words to tell you what it means to me, all that you've told me, but I don't want to mislead you. Carlos and I, well, neither one of us is sure where we're going from here. Neither of us knows whether we're cut out for marriage and children. We agreed to take it a day at a time."

"Of course, Stephanie, we must all take life a day at a time, and you and Carlos must do what's best for you. I would not wish to interfere with your lives. However, do not forget how much time the two of you have wasted already and what it took to bring you together. It is possible to be too careful, you know. Ah, well, it will work itself out. Yes?"

"Yes." Her words were meant to comfort, but I was suddenly feeling uncertain.

She stopped piling meat onto the plate and turned to me. "Here, little one, you can now take this platter to the table." As I walked over to take the platter from her, she reached up and put her soft hand to my cheek.

"What beautiful children you would give my Carlos but, buen dios, what a handful they would be. Enough so that no mother would ever have time to be bored. And just think of the adventure it would be raising a little boy like my Carlos or a little girl like you." At that she kissed me on both cheeks and smiled gently at me.

"It would take a very strong and independent woman to manage so dangerous an adventure. Someone like Wonder Woman, perhaps? No woman should be expected to be Wonder Woman. Why, what woman could possibly want to live up to that kind of pressure?" With one last knowing smile, Ranger's very intelligent, very tricky mother bustled into the living room calling everyone in to eat.

When I walked out of the kitchen and sat the platter of meat in my hands on the table, Ranger was talking quietly to one of his nieces who had curled herself onto his lap. I briefly wondered what it would be like to see a child of ours on Ranger's lap and had to shake my head. When Ranger looked up, his eyes locked on mine. I watched as he lifted his niece off his lap, unfolded himself from the chair and walked over to me. Framing my face with his hands, he leaned down and took my mouth in a possessive kiss to the sounds of hoots and clapping from his family. I was blushing by the time he raised his head. Giving me a soft smile, he led me to a seat at the table as the rest of the family gathered around.

I was amazed at the way Ranger obviously enjoyed his nieces and nephews. All through dinner they demanded his attention, sometimes nearly coming to blows with each other in a competition to entertain Uncle Carlos. Ranger's mother didn't appear to be bothered by the ruckus. In fact, every once in a while I would see the sparkle in her eyes and the smile that played around her mouth, and I realized that this was a mother who loved her family very much and that she took great pleasure in their antics and stories.

I felt someone staring and turned to find Ranger's niece Serena watching me with large, doe eyes. I didn't know how old she was, but I would have guessed around eight or nine.

"Uncle Tank said you blow things up." I nearly choked on the mouthful of food I had been chewing. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Ranger smirk.

"Ah, yeah, sometimes. But it's never my fault." I looked to Serena's mother for help, but every adult at the table had suddenly become fascinated with the tablecloth or their plates. Even though their heads were ducked, I could see smiles on most of their faces.

Hoping that would be the end of it, I forked more food into my mouth.

"Uncle Tanks says that you're an accident waiting to happen. What does that mean?" Now Celia lifted her head.

"Serena, that's enough." Her mother gave me an apologetic look.

"It means Uncle Tank is a tattletale," I told the little girl. Her face lit up as several of the women at the table snorted quietly.

Ranger's nephew looked over. "What do you blow up?" Feeling uncomfortable, I looked over at Ranger.

With a twinkle in his eyes, Ranger looked at the little boy.

"Mostly my cars." Ranger's dry tone the little boy's eyes went wide, and the adults around the table all started laughing. I could feel my face getting hot, and I glared at Ranger.

"Mikey next door to me blew up his sister's Barbie car with a firecracker, and his daddy spanked him. Does Uncle Carlos spank you when you blow up his cars?" At this point two of Ranger's sisters and his brother-in-law pushed away from the table and exited the room. I could hear gales of laughter from the kitchen. Wanting nothing more than to crawl under the table, I kept my eyes on my plate, hoping the little boy would let it go.

"Well, do you, Uncle Carlos? Do you spank Stephnie when she blows up your cars?"

"No, buddy, I don't spank Stephanie when she blows up my cars." Ranger's voice broke, and he sounded as if he were strangling.

"You should spank her next time, 'cause Mikey never blew up anything again after his daddy spanked him. His daddy said Mikey learned his lesson. Maybe Stephnie hasta learn her lesson too. Mikey's dad said a good spanking always does the trick." When Ranger tipped back his head and laughed, I gave up and burst into giggles, red face and all. Within seconds every adult in the house had lost control.

Ranger's brother finally stopped laughing long enough to choke out, "Well, brother, do you think it would work?"

Ranger's, "I don't know, but I'm willing to give it a shot," sent everyone into fits of laughter again. By the time I was able to stop laughing my sides and my stomach hurt. While the other women and I took the dishes to the kitchen, Ranger's sisters were having fun at my expense, making jokes about how long it would take me to hurry out and blow up another car. By the sound of masculine laughter from the other side of the house, my guess was the men were having just as much fun with Ranger.

By the time dinner was cleared away and dishes were done I had managed to memorize most of the names of Ranger's family. With the exception of my embarrassment at the whole spanking conversation, I couldn't remember ever having so much fun eating dinner. The steady stream of conversation and insults back and forth had made for a fun and lively evening, and I was surprised to find myself reluctant to leave when Ranger announced it was time to go. I thanked Ranger's mother again and walked over to say goodbye to his grandmother. I was surprised to realize I hadn't even felt uncomfortable when several of his siblings had hugged me, as well as Ranger, before we left.

I was thinking about all of this when Ranger's voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Babe." He reached over and lifted my hand to his lips as he drove.

"I love your family. They're great." Ranger agreed with me and once again went silent. Occasionally on the ride home I slid a look at him in the dark, but his expression, as usual, gave nothing away of his thoughts.

When we arrived at Rangeman Ranger took my hand and led me to the elevator, again silent on the ride up to the apartment. It wasn't until we were inside and in the living room that Ranger asked me about my conversation with his mother in the kitchen.

"What did my mother have to say to you that had you looking so shell-shocked, Babe?" I should have known Ranger would have read the emotions on my face evoked by his mother's words in the kitchen.

"I just realized that your mother is much more subtle and clever than mine. By the way, how does your mother know about the whole Wonder Woman thing?"

"Tank."

"And Tank knows because?" I was even more confused now.

"He overheard a conversation between your grandmother and me at the hospital about you."

"I see. Tank has a really big mouth." I was too relaxed at the moment to put much heat behind my statement, and Ranger softy chuckled. After a few moments of silence, Ranger spoke again.

"I take it my mother mentioned the fact that it's her fondest dream to see me married and supplying her with even more grandchildren. I should have warned you, but I thought she'd wait until she'd met you at least two or three times."

"It's okay. She was very kind." Ranger's eyes locked on mine for a long, silent moment. He appeared to be fighting some internal battle. When he finally spoke, his voice was neutral, his face blank.

"Seeing you with my family tonight makes me realize that it's time for me to explain some things to you."


	19. Chapter 19

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to send their reviews. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 19**

_"Seeing you with my family tonight makes me realize that it's time for me to explain some things to you."_

I followed Ranger as he walked in and sat on the couch. "As you know, I was married once. What you maybe don't realize is that it wasn't really a marriage. I've told you that Rachel was a nice Catholic girl I took advantage of one night on leave when I was in the military. After spending the night with her, I left the next day. A week later I was deployed overseas. She knew my name, of course, and I'd talked about the unit I was with. It took over two months for her letters to catch up with me. When they finally did, there were several of them, each a little more frantic and urgent than the last. I can still remember the shock I felt when I read that she was pregnant." Ranger stopped. He was watching me, his face blank, as if he was expecting me to be shocked too, as if he was waiting to see if I'd judge him.

When I remained silent, he finally continued. "It would be an understatement to say that her parents were unhappy. They had an image of the perfect husband and family for their daughter, and I had come along and ruined their plans."

Ranger got up and walked to the window. His breathing was slow and even, but I could tell this was difficult for him. Even after the last couple of weeks and the progress we were making, Ranger still wasn't big on sharing. The fact that he was trying now proved that he loved me, more than anything else could have.

"I made arrangements for an emergency leave. Things were slow, and the commanding officer that I was stationed under at the time was a decent guy. I headed back to Miami and to Rachel. I called when I got there, and she invited me over to her parents' home. I was young and a little nervous. I knew better than to expect a warm welcome, and I was right." I watched as Ranger uncharacteristically raked his hand through his hair.

"You don't have to tell me this." Ranger seemed uncomfortable, and even though I'd always complained about him being the man of mystery, the truth was I didn't want to be responsible for causing him to relive a difficult time in his life.

"I think I do, Babe. If this is going to work between us, there are things you need to understand about why I've always felt that marriage wasn't an option for me. It's more than just the dangerous lifestyle I live." Even though he had answered me, Ranger continued to stare out the window as if he were drawing strength from the darkness of the night.

"Rachel's father answered the door when I got there. I spent the better part of an hour talking with him. I told him that I would marry Rachel and give my baby my name if that's what she wanted. I told him I'd do everything I could to financially support them. I wasn't making a lot of money at that point, but I told him I'd send what I could. Hell, I didn't need much anyway." I thought about the courage it must have taken for Ranger to do what he did that day. It didn't surprise me in the least. Ranger's not the kind of man who would walk away from his responsibilities.

"I also told him that I wouldn't play any part in forcing Rachel into marriage, regardless of how he felt about it, if it wasn't what she wanted. At that point he finally allowed her to come into the room. He didn't want to leave, but I refused to talk to Rachel with him hovering over her. I needed to know that whatever decision she made was of her own free will." I could picture a young Carlos trying to do the right thing.

"I remember her face was pale, and she was so nervous. Much more nervous than I had been. I also remember thinking that she shouldn't have to go through this alone and that it was my fault that she was, that she was going to have to. I didn't even have a choice. They don't just let a man out of the army because he gets a girl pregnant. I hadn't been in that long, and I had a ways to go before I could even think about getting out. Even if I could have, I had no prospects and no way to support a family. I had dropped out of college. I knew I could always get a job, but I still had to finish my tour."

I thought about how hard it must have been on Ranger at the time as he struggled with his lack of options.

"We discussed the future. I offered to come back when my tour was up, to come get her and the baby and try to make a family. I'd screwed up, and I'd messed up the life of a sweet girl who hadn't deserved it. I was young and reckless, and she was paying the price much more than I was. I knew it was the least I could do. She was very kind. She was crying as she explained to me that she didn't want to stay married after the baby was born. She took full responsibility for the part she'd played in the situation we'd found ourselves in and did her best to ease some of my guilt."

The shadows in Ranger's eyes when he turned to look at me told me that while he might have learned to deal with the situation with Rachel and Julie, a part of him would always feel the weight of what had happened all those years ago.

"Rachel said what we both already knew. We didn't know each other. We certainly didn't love each other. It had been one of those impulsive things, and neither one of us had ever considered spending the rest of our lives together. She explained that getting married and giving the baby my name would help smooth things over with her parents. She told me that she planned to continue living with them, and she insisted it would be a relief to know that once the baby was born and the divorce was final that she could try her best to get on with her life. She made it clear that while she wouldn't stop me entirely from seeing my baby, she preferred me to play only a minor role in its life."

"It was difficult for you." I tried to keep any traces of sympathy out of my voice, though it wasn't easy. Sympathy was not what Ranger needed to hear at the moment.

"Not nearly as difficult as it was for Rachel. I wasn't a young girl who had to tell her parents that she'd gotten pregnant by a man they didn't even know existed."

"That's why you've always agreed to the distance she kept between you and Julie."

"As I said, it was the least I could do." There was a long pause. Ranger turned from the window and went to the kitchen. When he came back, he was carrying two bottles of water. He sat down on the couch. Ranger handed one of them to me and took a drink from the other before continuing.

"That was about it. We went to the courthouse the next day, got the judge to waive the waiting period, and we were married. She wanted to go straight back to her father's house, but I insisted on taking her out to dinner. We talked for a while, and I gave her information on how to contact my family in case anything happened to me and she needed anything. I told her I'd keep in touch the best I could and asked her to write and let me know how she was doing. I called my family and told them what was going on and asked them to be there if Rachel needed them. I flew back out the next day."

Ranger leaned forward and placed his water on the coffee table in front of him. He took my hand and linked my fingers with his. Now he looked at me as he spoke.

"We wrote each other. I sent money as often as I could. A few months later my C.O. called me into his office and said that he saw potential in me and that he had recommended me to be recruited for the Special Forces. I hadn't really given it much thought before that, but when the recruitment came down, I jumped on it. I'd found out that I had a knack for certain things that the army found desirable, and it meant more money to send back for Rachel and the baby." Ranger gave my hand a tug and pulled me against him. He turned us so that we were both lying on the couch with my head on his chest, tucked under his chin.

"As soon as I could after I got word that Julie had been born, I took leave and went to see them. She was so tiny and beautiful that I was in awe. I stayed for a couple of days and visited every chance I could, but I could tell that Rachel was uncomfortable with me there. I didn't offer to come back and try to make a family this time. That was no longer an option for either of us. We were strangers that had shared one night together and had exchanged some letters. We were strangers even though we had created a miracle. I asked her if they needed anything, and she assured me they'd be okay. I told her about the offer for the Special Forces and that I had signed on. I explained that there'd be more money for her and Julie. I could tell she was grateful. I could also tell that there wasn't really any room for me in their lives."

I felt tears burn the back of my eyes and a lump in my throat as I thought about how difficult it must have been for both Rachel and Ranger, and I was glad he couldn't see my face.

"Before I left, Rachel handed me papers that her father had already had an attorney to draw up. She had filed for a divorce two weeks after Julie was born, and she needed me to sign the paperwork. They effectively included a clause stating that I was pretty much giving up any right to see my child unless Rachel consented to it. It wasn't the easiest thing I'd ever done, but she insisted it was what she wanted and I knew what I was getting into as part of the Special Forces Team, so I signed them. Rachel promised to keep in touch and send me pictures of Julie. I left the next day and headed back to begin my Special Forces training. Three months later I received the final divorce papers. Apparently it doesn't take very long when there's nothing to dispute." Ranger paused for a few minutes.

Just when I thought he wasn't going to say anymore, he went on.

"Rachel sent me pictures from time to time and stayed in contact with my family. My mother and Celia had called her after I'd told them the situation, and they'd flown to Miami when Rachel had gone into labor. A couple years later Rachel met Ron. She wrote me a letter explaining that she was in love, and they were planning to marry. Her next letter came asking me to sign papers allowing Ron to legally adopt Julie. It took a while for them to catch up to me because I was on another mission and wasn't receiving any mail. When the paperwork came, I never hesitated. At that point I'd been in the Special Forces for a couple of years, and I lived every day with the knowledge that it might be my last. I signed the papers, congratulated her on her marriage and wished them both the best. It all seemed so far away at the time, like I was reading about somebody else's life."

I rubbed my hand gently back and forth on Ranger's chest subconsciously attempting to sooth him.

"We had a situation arise just before I finished up my tour with the army that had me feeling angry and resentful at the whole world. The night before I was to catch a plane home I started packing up my gear. Needless to say, there wasn't much there. I had my discharge papers in one envelope, and all the paperwork Rachel had sent me over the years in another." Ranger's voice went flat, and he sat up and put some distance between us.

"I don't know what made me do it, but I spread those documents out on the table beside the few pictures Rachel had mailed me, including one of her and Ron and Julie at Julie's third birthday party. I sat there and stared at them for the longest time. Four documents; the first two informing me that I had a wife and a child, the second two informing me I no longer had a wife or a child; a marriage certificate, a birth certificate, divorce papers, adoption papers." For the second time since he'd started talking Ranger got up and walked over to stare out at the darkness.

"I looked at that family picture, and suddenly I was so furious I wanted to smash something. This beautiful dark haired little girl with the pink bows in her hair and big brown eyes was my child. The whole time I'd been fighting and killing and trying to keep myself and my men alive, someone else was living what could have been my life, and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it. Even if there was, I wouldn't have. Deep down I knew I didn't deserve to be a part of that child's life, didn't deserve that amazing little girl smiling so innocently at the camera. I had done nothing to earn that right." Before I could disagree with him, Ranger went on.

"I opened a bottle of Jack Daniels and started feeling sorry for myself. By the time I was half way through the bottle, I'd convinced myself that marriage was nothing more than a piece of paper that meant absolutely nothing. By the time I'd finished the bottle, I had convinced myself that marriage and a family wasn't for me and never would be." I got up and walked over behind Ranger and wrapped my arms around his waist, resting my face against his back.

"When my flight took off the next day, it left without me. I was hung over and still half drunk, and I told myself I had nothing to go home to anyway. I got a hotel room near the airport and bought another bottle. Some time during the alcohol-blurred week that followed a man came to see me. He said he'd heard of my reputation with the Special Forces and wanted to offer me a job. He said he had a shipment that needed to be delivered, and because there was a high risk of getting shot while trying to make the delivery, he'd pay me a large amount of money. Cash. The amount he offered was more than I would have made in six months in the army." Ranger shifted out of my embrace so that he could turn and look into my eyes.

"I was ready to tell him to go to hell when I saw those pictures again where I'd tossed them on the table. I walked over and stood looking down at them for what seemed like forever. By the time he left, we had an agreement. I ended up doing a lot of jobs for him over the years, but that was the last time I've ever gotten drunk." Now Ranger took my hand and led me back to the couch. He pulled me down next to him and put his arm around me as I curled into his side.

"Word got out, of course. I had earned myself a reputation in a short period of time as someone who wasn't afraid to die and who could get things done that others couldn't. Six months later Tank left the army and caught up with me. Shortly after, Lester and Hector followed. We all sat around talking one night about what kind of opportunities were out there for men our ages with our background, and we all agreed we'd have a hard time working a regular 9 to 5 job after the way we'd spent the last several years. The conversation turned to what we were good at; surveillance, security, tracking people. I guess you could say the rest is history."

"The others were pretty much just joking around, but I thought a lot about that night over the next several months. Finally, when I had enough money, I told them my plan. I left the guys and started Rangeman with the help of some partners. Just like before, the three of them followed shortly after. I chose Miami at first so I could keep an eye on Julie and make sure Ron was being a good father. Then I opened an office in Trenton and moved back here. After business picked up we spread out to Boston and Atlanta."

I knew there was more to the story, to his life in the army and what he'd seen as a mercenary, but now that Ranger was finally opening up to me I didn't want to nag him for every gory detail.

Neither one of us said anything for the longest time. Ranger had wrapped both of his arms around me. I thought about all that he had told me, and for the first time I thought I understood him a little better. Ranger had told me before that the situation with Julie wasn't painful because Rachel and Ron and Julie were so happy, but I knew that wasn't completely true. There was pain here, and it broke my heart that Ranger had had no one to turn to or that he hadn't let himself turn to anyone.

He must have read my mind, because his next words were gruff. "I didn't tell you this to make you sad, Babe. It all worked out for the best for everyone. Rachel and Ron are great parents, and Julie's happy. I get to see her on occasion, more now since the Scrog incident. Julie insisted on it. I'm not sure Rachel was thrilled about the idea, but somewhere that kid got a streak of stubbornness a mile wide."

I laughed. "Hmmm, wonder where she might have gotten that from?" My sarcasm wasn't lost on Ranger, and he was quick to retaliate by moving his hand under me and pinching my ass. I shrieked and squirmed, reaching back to rub the spot.

The next thing I knew Ranger had flipped me sideways so that I was lying on my back, and he was supporting himself on his elbows over me. He leaned down and took my mouth in a slow and deep kiss. Just when I felt my brain begin to fog over, Ranger pulled back.

"I told you this, Babe, so you'd understand. I don't have any experience at being a husband. I'm not sure I'll ever be good husband material or father material. After what happened with Rachel and Julie, and before I met you, I never even considered those things as an option for me. To be honest with you, after all I've seen and done in my life, I wasn't sure I had it in me to fall in love. I'm still not sure how it happened." Ranger sounded puzzled, and it made my heart ache knowing that he had believed himself incapable of love.

"I liked you right from the beginning. You were sitting across the table from me, and I could tell you were scared half to death, but you were going to go after Morelli no matter what. It took a lot of courage to do that. I guess that's when it started. I just didn't know it at the time."

I reached up and touched Ranger's face.

"I love you, Carlos. I love and admire everything you've done in your life that's made you the man that you are."

I watched as Ranger's eyes dilated black and he absorbed my words.

"My grandmother said tonight that you have a beautiful and loyal heart. She's right. If anyone could change my mind about marriage, it would be you. Maybe I _should _fly you to Vegas and marry you before you change your mind about loving me. "

"Ranger, I'm not going to change my mind. Besides, I'm from the Burg. I cannot go to Vegas and get married. My entire family would disown me." I watched as amusement filled his eyes.

"Just one more reason, Babe." I narrowed my eyes at him, but before I could say anything Ranger's mouth took mine again. When he lifted his head, I realized that I was probably one of the few people Ranger had ever discussed his marriage with, and I couldn't help feeling special. I was about to say something when Ranger's cell phone rang.

"Yo." I watched as Ranger slipped into work mode.

"I'll be right down." Ranger flipped his phone shut, shifted off of me, and stood up.

"That was Tank. One of our skips just made an appearance at a bar on Stark Street. He needs me to ride along with him to pick him up and then I have some paperwork I need to catch up on in the office." Rather than being annoyed that he was leaving so abruptly, I decided that it might do Ranger good to put the memories from the past away for now and that it would do me good to have time to process all that he'd told me and think about how it might effect our future. The truth was, every time Ranger mentioned getting married, I was overcome with a mixture of yearning and outright panic. I smiled and got up and walked over to him.

"I thought I'd call Val and Mary Lou. Their kids should be in bed by now, and it will give me a chance to talk with them." I leaned up and pressed my lips softly to his in a gentle kiss.

Ranger slowly lifted his head, and in his eyes I thought I saw gratitude. I knew I saw love. "I'll be back, Babe." Ranger walked to the door and grabbed his keys out of the silver tray.

"Be safe. I love you." I watched as Ranger threw me his 200-watt smile on the way out the door.

"I love you too, mi amor."


	20. Chapter 20

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 20 **

_**Ranger's POV** _

I woke up with a cold knot of fear in my stomach. Without moving I made myself use all of my senses to take stock of my surroundings. My heart didn't race and my breath continued to be slow and even. I forced myself to relax as I became certain that the danger I was sensing wasn't immediate.

I looked down in the dark at the woman in my arms. I loved waking up with Steph curled against my side. It wasn't unusual for me to wake up early. Before Stephanie had moved in with me, I would have immediately rolled out of bed, dressed and started my day with a long mind-clearing run. I laid there for a few minutes thinking about doing just that now that I was awake.

The longer I considered getting up, the more the feeling of dread spread through me like wildfire at the thought of leaving Steph. I knew the feeling was unreasonable. No one could get to her here. She was as safe at Rangeman as she would be if she were locked up in a safe house. Probably safer. The knowledge did nothing to make me feel better about leaving her. I could have asked her to get up and go running with me, but I valued my life too much to do that. Stephanie hated running. I figured her taking lessons with Tank and Lester was a way for us to compromise, and since she hadn't given me a hard time about it, I decided not to push the running.

Falling back on my training, I relaxed my muscles one by one. I made myself clear my mind, and I worked at tamping down any emotions that might be clouding my judgment. No matter what I did, the feeling of dread wouldn't leave me. Unable to settle back down, knowing I'd get no more sleep, I started to shift Steph, sliding my arms from around her slowly in an attempt to not wake her.

"Ranger?" I felt the quiet whisper across my skin.

"It's all right, Babe. Go back to sleep."

"Are you leaving?" I knew she was asking if I was going out of town as I'd warned her I might, and I knew with absolute certainty I was going nowhere while my instincts were screaming that she was in danger.

"No, Babe, I'm not leaving."

"Mmmm. Good. Stay. Don't leave me." I felt a shudder go through me at her husky words.

"Never." I thought about all I had told her the night before and how she had calmly taken it all in stride. When I'd seen her absolute acceptance of me, I'd been staggered. I'd had to fight the temptation to tell her every gruesome detail of the ugliness I had seen and taken part of in my past just to finally have someone to share it with, someone I knew wouldn't judge me. But here in the dark I was relieved that Tank's phone call had interrupted me before I'd had a chance to give in to that temptation. There were things I wasn't ready to share with her yet, things I wasn't sure she was ready to hear. It was amazing to me that I could know without a doubt that if and when the time came that I did decide to share more of my past with Stephanie, she wouldn't condemn me. That was enough for now.

Suddenly overwhelmed by the love I felt for this beautiful woman, I buried my face in her hair, inhaling the scent of her. Desperation had me rolling her gently to her back and running my mouth over her soft skin. Within minutes Steph's soft sighs and low throaty moans had my blood raging through my veins. I could feel an urgency driving me to show her how much I loved her in the one way I knew how.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

The sun was just peeking through the curtains when I finally allowed Steph to fall back to sleep. I knew that she'd felt the desperation of our lovemaking, but she was sleepy enough to accept my reassurance that everything was fine.

I leaned down to place a gentle kiss against her soft lips. When I lifted my head I let my eyes travel over her face as if memorizing every detail.

"I love you, Babe," I whispered and was surprised when her sleepy voice answered me.

"I love you too, Carlos." Within seconds her steady breathing told me she was once again sleeping soundly.

I reluctantly crawled out of bed and into the shower. Even with my body satiated as it always was after loving Stephanie, the cold ball of fear in my gut had my muscles tensed. Dressing in full Rangeman gear, I grabbed my keys and headed down to my office.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

_**Tank's POV** _

I gave the door to the office a quick rap before entering. Surprised not to find Ranger behind his desk I looked around the room, finding him staring blindly out the window.

"Yo, what's up?" I watched as Ranger turned to face me. Something in his face and his body language had my body tensing.

"I wanted to talk to you. Come on in." Ranger waited until I had shut the door before saying anything more. He walked over to his desk but didn't sit down.

"Is there a problem," I asked.

"I don't know. Has Lula said anything to you about her and Steph having a run in with one of their skips? Anything unusual?"

I thought about it for a minute. "Nothing out of the ordinary. Wouldn't Steph have told you if they had?"

"Usually. Things have been a little hectic since she started back to work. I just thought maybe Lula had said something."

"Man, what's going on?" I watched as Ranger turned and walked back to the window.

"Bad vibes." Now he had my full attention. Ranger and I had been friends long enough for me to know that when he had bad vibes, something was usually up.

"You think it involves Stephanie?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I do. I'm just not sure where the danger's going to come from. As far as I know she hasn't run into any crazies this week. She hasn't acted as if anything's bothering her, and I think I'd know if it was. We know someone ransacked her apartment and was asking questions, but we have no idea who, and there's been nothing else to indicate someone's after her." I watched in shock as Ranger paced back to his desk, raking his fingers through his hair. Ranger didn't pace.

I watched him for a minute before speaking. "Have you asked Steph about it?"

"She's sleeping. I'll ask her when she gets up. It may be nothing. Things haven't exactly been normal for me lately either. Maybe I'm overacting."

"Ranger, man, I don't want to make things worse, but you're not one to overreact, and I've never known your instincts to be wrong."

"I know. Wishful thinking, I guess." Ranger paused. "How are her lessons going?"

"She gets a little better every day. She won't admit it, but I think she's actually starting to enjoy the lessons."

"Strong points?"

"Her instincts. She's got incredible instincts. Maybe the best I've ever come across next to yours." Tank sounded like he couldn't quite believe what he was saying.

"Weak points?"

"When she starts out the lessons, she spends the first half hour on her ass because she doesn't trust her instincts. She hesitates too much. We're working on it, and she's getting past that. The real problem is her focus. She's got no zone. It's like pulling teeth to get her focused and then damn near impossible to keep her that way." Ranger sat quietly for a few minutes.

"It's new to her. She'll get it. Do you still feel like it's a waste of your time?"

I huffed out a breath. "No, I don't. If I can help her find the key to concentrating and she continues her lessons, in another year I'd put money on her eventually being as good as any man you've got in hand-to-hand self-defense tactics. Of course her biggest challenge is her size, but there are plenty of women out there who learn to work around that, and Steph will too."

"Unfortunately, my gut's telling me we don't have a year." Ranger paused again. "I need you to do me a favor."

"Anything, man. You know that."

"I need you to keep an eye on her this morning. As you know, I have a meeting that I can't miss. I want you to stay with Stephanie until I can wrap that up. Hopefully I'll be back by the time she gets up and finishes her lesson with you and Lester. If she goes out before I get back, I want you with her the whole time. I'll call when I'm finished and meet you wherever you are."

"No problem, Ranger. Do you want me to tell her why?"

"Just tell her I'll explain it to her when I catch up with her later this morning. If she gives you too much trouble, have her call my cell."

"Okay." I turned to walk to the door and something made me turn back.

"Hey, boss."

"Yeah."

"Have you stopped to think it might be you? Maybe you should have someone ride along with you today too." I wasn't happy with the idea of Ranger taking someone else with him to cover his back. That was usually my job, and I took it seriously. On the other hand, it felt good to know that Ranger still trusted me to keep Steph safe.

"Maybe. It could be. But my gut's telling me she's in the middle of it somehow, Tank. Just keep a close eye on her."

"Sure thing, boss." I closed the door, leaving Ranger alone. I walked over to where Hal sat manning the security cameras to tell him I wanted to know the second Steph left the apartment. When Hal glanced toward Ranger's office, I said the two words that I knew would get the attention of every man in the room and put them on guard.

"Bad vibes."


	21. Chapter 21

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 21 **

_**Steph's POV**_

After my lesson with Tank and Lester, Tank told me about Ranger's orders for him to stay with me until he finished his meeting. I thought about arguing, but I knew from experience it wouldn't do me any good. Connie had called and begged me to come pick up files on some of the backed up skips. Apparently Vinnie was about to lose money, and he wasn't happy about it, which meant that he was making Connie's life miserable. I insisted on taking my own car, and Tank followed me to Vinnie's in one of Rangeman's shiny black SUV's. I was surprised when he remained in the vehicle while I went into the office.

Connie had just handed me a file when she and Lula went deathly still. Considering they did so at the exact moment I felt my hormones go into overdrive, I was pretty sure Ranger had just walked in. Rather than turn around to look, I waited in anticipation for the touch of his hand at my neck. Within seconds I felt the warmth of his fingers as they slid gently from the nape of my neck into my hair, and Ranger molded the front of his body to my back.

Placing his head next to mine Ranger read over my shoulder. "David Polluck. Petty theft; two boxes of Tastykakes stuffed into the front of his jacket." I couldn't see Ranger's face, but I could hear the amusement in his voice.

"Sounds like a match made in heaven. You going after this guy, Babe?" I shifted my body away so I could turn and look at Ranger. His lips were tilted up slightly at the corners but his eyes were carefully blank.

"Yep. Apparently this guy is too small time for the Rangeman crew." Ranger lifted his eyebrow at my sarcasm.

"Babe, you're part of the Rangeman crew."

"I am?" I'd worked for Rangeman off and on, but I guess I never really thought Ranger saw me as part of his crew.

"Of course you are. If you give up working for Vinnie and start working for me full time, you won't be doing these types of skips anymore either." I wanted to ask him more questions, but before I could say anything else Lula piped up.

"We'll have to go after him tomorrow. There's a shoe sale at the Macy's. We haven't been shopping in two months. No way we're missing this sale, girlfriend." Lula was huffing in indignation.

"I've waited all week for that sale. We're going shopping for shoes. Then we're going to Victoria's Secret on account of my man's coming by tonight, and I need something sexy." Connie, Ranger and I all froze for a second as an image of Lula in something sexy from Victoria's Secret slammed into our brain. We all stared at each other fighting not to shudder.

"She can't wait until tomorrow," Connie said. "If this guy isn't brought in today, Vinnie loses his bond. That's why I called her. Vinnie told you we were backed up on these low bonds, and for once the little pervert wasn't exaggerating."

I stood there a second chewing on my bottom lip, fighting the battle between my lust for shoes and doing the right thing. I looked up to see a slight smirk on Ranger's face, and I knew he was reading my mind again.

"Maybe we can stop by on the way to the mall. What's this guy's address?" I looked down. 113 Orchard Street. I blew out a breath. Great, clear on the other end of town, away from the mall. I noticed Ranger had looked down and read the address, too.

When Ranger's eyes came back to mine I felt myself go damp at the heat in them. He leaned close and put his lips against my ear, "I'll make you a deal, Babe. I'll go pick up this loser. You go buy a pair of those really high heels and a skimpy little outfit and model them for me when we get home." For a second, as Ranger stepped back, I could barely breathe. All I could do was stare into the dark black pools of his eyes.

"Are you sure?" Again I watched his eyes flare hot.

"Dead sure, Babe. Besides, considering his taste in food, you might run away with him, and I don't want the competition."

"Deal." I watched the heat in Ranger's eyes bank as he took the file from me. He then reached out with his free hand, and I placed my hand in his. I saw Connie fanning herself out of the corner of my eye as Ranger led me outside and into the alley along side Vinnie's building.

When Ranger looked at me, the look in his eyes made me uneasy.

"What's going on, Ranger? You had Tank follow me over here this morning, and now you've got a look in your eye that's worrying me."

"Bad vibes, Babe. My gut's telling me something's off. Have you seen anything unusual? Noticed a tail?"

"No, only Tank."

"I need you to do me a favor, Babe. I need you to let me keep someone with you while you and Lula shop at the mall." I didn't argue with Ranger. If I'd learned one thing since I'd met him, it's that Ranger's usually right, and once he sets his mind on something, he's not going to budge. Remembering what Lester had said about Ranger rarely needing things from anyone, I agreed.

"As long as whoever it is doesn't plan on coming into Victoria's Secret with me to pick out that outfit."

I saw a flash of gratitude in Ranger's eyes just before he leaned in.

"About that outfit, Babe."

"Mmmm?" I found myself pinned with my back against the brick wall. Ranger's eyes locked on mine as he slowly molded his hard body against my curves. Never taking his eyes from mine he shifted against my center, watching as my eyes blurred. Slowly he lowered his mouth to mine, eyes open the entire time.

I could feel the heat of Ranger's breath against my parted lips as he whispered, "Really high heels, Steph. Very skimpy outfit." I didn't have a chance to respond as Ranger's mouth took mine with a hungry ferocity.

I whimpered as his tongue touched mine. I squirmed, trying to bring his body closer. Ranger slid his leg between mine, and I moaned as his hand slid up under my shirt to teasingly brush across my hardened nipple. When he ended the kiss, I let my head fall back to rest against the wall behind me. Taking my move as an invitation, Ranger immediately began placing hot kisses along my throat, working his way up to my ear. I could hear his ragged breathing and the sound added another layer of excitement coursing through my veins.

"Babe, we need to stop now or I'm going to take you back to the apartment and finish this." It took a second for Ranger's words, groaned into my ear, to penetrate the fog that covered my mind.

Taking a deep breath I looked into Ranger's eyes as he pulled back. Without realizing it, my hands had pulled the leather strip loose that held his hair back. My fingers were buried in his silky hair, my body had involuntarily been thrusting against Ranger's hard thigh between my legs, and my breath was coming in short choppy little pants.

As reality returned, I could feel the heat rising in my face, and I looked away. Ranger's hand went gently to my chin turning my gaze back to him.

Seeing my embarrassment, Ranger gave me the almost smile then leaned down to give me a short hard kiss.

"We can't," I finally panted out. "Connie and Lula will kill us if I miss the shoe sale and this guy isn't brought in today."

"I'll tell Tank what's going on. He's not going to be happy about mall duty. I think maybe I better wait until I'm in my car and call him." I leaned foward and looked around the corner of the building as Ranger's eyes cut to Tank who was still sitting in the black SUV across the street.

Suddenly my mind cleared. "Wait a minute. Are you freaking nuts? You have to get someone to go with us who _is not _Tank. I am not going into Victoria's Secret with Lula and Tank."

"Relax, Babe, I'll order him to wait outside the store." Ranger's eyes were crinkled up at the corners, and I could tell he was amused.

I huffed out a breath. "Fine, but if Lula starts running to the window and yelling, 'What do you think about this one,' to Tank and holding up a thong, I'm going to tell her you volunteered to take her on her next lingerie shopping trip." I laughed as the amusement fled from Ranger's face to be replaced with a mild look of horror.

"Babe." And he was gone. I watched as Ranger angled himself behind the wheel of the shiny black Dodge Ram and drove off and then went to find Lula. I had some shopping to do.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

"I still can't believe that shit-breath, asshole, dumbfuck, pecker of a mall cop arrested my ass."

"He didn't exactly arrest you. He detained you." I had spent the last 10 minutes of the drive trying to calm Lula down.

"Detained my ass. He put cuffs on me, didn't he?" Well, technically he tried to put cuffs on her. Between Lula flapping her arms around and Tank coming into the store to tower over the mall security guard, he never actually got the cuffs on her.

"Lula, you put a thong in your purse and walked out of the store."

"Yeah, but I wasn't going to steal it or nothing, I was just taking it out to show my man. Besides, this is all your fault."

"Say what? How is it my fault?" The shock of Lula's accusation caused me to look over at her. When I looked back up, I had to slam on my brakes to keep from running a red light.

"You told Batman to make Tank stay outside the store. How was I supposed to see if he liked it or not? And don't tell me I could have bought it and taken it out to show him. If he didn't like it I would have had to go back in and return it, and you know I hate that return shit. All that stupid paperwork and showing your driver's license and all that crap. Hun-uh. I don't take that bus. So it's all your fault I got arrested."

"Lula, he didn't arrest you. He detained you. Besides, once Big Dog and Carl got there they straightened it all out," I pointed out.

"Yeah, but only because that there Big Dog guy didn't want me telling no one about how he likes to wear women's underwear."

"What?"

"Jackie diddled him once, and she said he had on a pair of red silky women's underwear." I stared at Lula. Tank beeped the horn behind me, and I looked up to see the light was green, and I took off into traffic.

"I'm just saying it was all your fault. They threatened to never let me come back. Can you believe that shit?"

"You're just lucky they didn't charge you with attempted murder," I said, trying to hide my smile.

"I didn't do nothing."

"You wrapped a thong around that security officer's throat and almost choked him to death."

"Huh! It was an accident. I lost my balance, and I was just trying to grab him to keep from falling." I could still see that poor man laying on top of Lula on the floor of Victoria's Secret; a hot pink, extra large thong wrapped around his throat, his face buried in Lula's extra large bosom, and Tank glaring down at the guy like he was going to kill him. Carl and Big Dog and I had laughed until tears ran down our cheeks while we watched the security camera's videotape in the manager's office.

I could feel my lips start to twitch again at the images in my head. I'd conned the guys into letting me take the videotape back to Rangeman to make a copy, and I couldn't wait to share it with Ranger tonight. After I modeled the outfit and my great new FMP's, of course. On second thought, maybe we'd watch it tomorrow.

I was still thinking about the night ahead as I dropped Lula off at Vinnie's and headed back to the apartment with Tank following close behind.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Shopping bags in hand, Tank and I had just stepped off the elevator onto the fifth floor. I hadn't been able to reach Ranger on his cell phone, and I wanted to find out from Hal if he had checked in to say when he'd be back.

The minute we walked into the comp area we could hear Hal's voice loud and urgent.

"Ranger's engaged panic. Repeat, Ranger has engaged his panic button."

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

_**A/N: I thought about leaving the story hanging here, waiting to post more tomorrow. Actually, I thought about posting each of these last several chapters one at a time, waiting for the reviews and dragging it out. I just couldn't do that to all the fabulous readers who have so kindly read my story and taken time to post their reviews! So I decided to post the rest of the story all at once. I hope you all like it. Please, please, please take time to review the story and let me know what you thought of it. Thank you again for those of you who stuck with my story from the beginning of 72 hours until the end of Learning about Love. I hope you've enjoyed them both. Keep in mind, please, they are my first attempts at writing anything, and I need to know if you liked them enough that I should try another. **_


	22. Chapter 22

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that has given me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 22 **

_Shopping bags in hand, Tank and I had just stepped off the elevator onto the fifth floor. I hadn't been able to reach Ranger on his cell phone, and I wanted to check with Hal to see if he had checked in to say when he'd be back._

_The minute we walked into the comp area we could hear Hal's voice loud and urgent. _

"_Ranger's engaged panic. Repeat, Ranger has engaged his panic button."_

_** XXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

Tank immediately began barking orders. "Hal, get me Ranger's last known location. Brown, Santos, Cal, Woody, with me. Let's go people. Let's move."

"113 Orchard Street. Panic and GPS signals are gone. Someone cut them off." Hearing Hal's words I felt my heart stop dead in my chest. The forgotten bags slipped from my fingers. Without thinking, I turned and started to run toward the door. I was yanked to a stop and looked to find Bobby's hand on my arm.

"You're staying here. This is no place for Ranger's woman."

"I'm going. I'm not just Ranger's woman, I'm part of this team, and I can do my job."

"We aren't going to take a chance that you're going to get all hysterical on us and risk Ranger's life. You're staying, and that's final." At this point Lester walked over, and Bobby looked to him for reinforcement.

"Les?" Lester looked at me and hesitated, then shrugged.

"She's part of the team." With that said, Lester headed toward the door.

With one last hope, Bobby turned to Tank. Tank looked at both of us and simply said, "She goes. Now, move your ass."

We hadn't taken three steps when Junior's voice stopped us.

Tank, we've got an incoming call. Guy says he's got something you're looking for. Won't talk to anyone but you or Stephanie.

** XXXXXXXXXXXXX **

Tank answered the phone on speaker, indicating we should all be silent.

"Yo."

"Yo, yourself, asshole." The voice coming through the phone carried an odd sort of accent that I couldn't place. I felt Lester stiffen beside me, and I watched Tank's face. Normally Tank was almost as hard to read as Ranger, but I saw the shock and then anger, race across his face followed by something I didn't recognize but was afraid might be fear.

"Guess who I've got sitting here, Tank, old buddy." Tank didn't have to guess, and everyone knew it.

"What do you want Malachi?"

I felt Lester's mouth close to my ear. He breathed rather than whispered directly into my ear. "Malachi Lawrence. Ex-Special Forces. Part of our unit at one time." I nodded my head slightly.

"Who said I wanted anything, Pierre?" I watched as Tank's face hardened even more.

"I'm talking to you. If all you wanted was Ranger dead, you wouldn't have bothered calling. He'd be dead by now."

"How do you know I haven't already killed him?" Lester put his hand on my arm to restrain me before I could step forward. His hand covered my mouth before I could speak. Tank just threw me a glare.

I tried to calm the pounding of my heart, tried to hear over the roaring in my ears.

"Because you're not stupid, Mal. You kill Ranger, you've got nothing to bargain with, and you know I won't deal unless I know he's alive. We all know the drill here, so why don't you cut the shit. What the hell do you want?" Now it was my turn to throw Tank a glare. Was he trying to get Ranger killed by pissing this guy off?

"You know, Tank, I should have waited until the two of you were together so I could have taken both of you down." There was a cold menacing tone to the response but no anger.

"Tell me where you are, and I'll be happy to join the party, Mal." I realized that for some reason Tank was trying to be provoking. Reaching up I pried Lester's hand from my mouth, trying to silently convey that I would keep it together.

A cynical laughter could be heard through the speaker. "You don't honestly believe I'm going to make it that easy for you, do you, Tank? I've never been known for being stupid."

"No, you've been known for being fucking crazy." Tank spat out.

"Now. Now. Is that anyway to talk to your old army buddy?" I realized that his voice kept swinging from one emotion to another, and it occurred to me that Tank was right. This man was crazy.

"How'd you get him, Malachi? Ranger's not known for being stupid either." I could see Hal furiously working the computer controls trying to track the call, and he was shaking his head frantically. I realized then that Tank was trying to keep this asshole talking any way he could.

"Well, now, it seems good old Carlos's instincts aren't quite what they used to be. It may be that he's going soft now that he's getting pussy on a regular basis. Not Manoso's usual type, is she?" My body went cold and the world tilted as I searched my mind, wondering if this lunatic was right and something I had done had caused this. Was I really so much of a distraction to Ranger that I'd put his life in danger?

When Tank didn't answer, the voice came back on.

"What's the matter, Tank, nothing to say to that?" Tank slid a look over to me.

"There ain't no pussy good enough to distract Ranger. You know it, and so do I. She's just one piece of ass until another one comes along." Holding my eyes, Tank gave me a look of regret. I kept my eyes on his, letting him know that I didn't care what he said about me as long as it helped Ranger.

"I don't know, she looked pretty sweet to me. Maybe I'll get myself a taste of the little bitch myself before I kill her. What do you think, Tank? Should I let Carolos watch? Get a little of my own back." I told myself that I would not let this twisted bastard get to me, but I could feel the bile rising up in my throat. I didn't need to know the man to know he was dangerous. You could hear it in every word he spoke.

"He won't care one way or the other," Tank replied. "Ranger's not wired that way, and you know it."

"It's a little too late for that tactic, Tank. I've been watching. Manoso doesn't spend every night for a week in a woman's hospital room just because she's a good fuck. I even have some really touching Polaroid's of them together the last couple of years. You could call them before and after shots. You know, it looks like love to me." We all heard the self-satisfaction in his voice, and I felt my skin crawl knowing this man had been watching me and Ranger without our knowing.

"You're never going to get near her, Mal. She's right here, and she's staying here." I could tell by the fisted hands at his side that Tank wasn't feeling as cool as he sounded.

"Not if you want to see your boss alive again she isn't. You fucking her, too, Tank? You want her for yourself? Because Manoso's never going to share anything with you again if you don't do as I say." Lester tightened his hold on me.

"We both know you'll never let Ranger go alive, Malachi, so why are you wasting my fucking time?" Tank let his voice take on an impatient edge.

"Oh, I don't know. That sweet little plum - ha ha - he's been slurping on just might be enough of a trade off to persuade me to forgive and forget and let him go. After all, this all started over a woman, my woman. Maybe it could end with Carlos's woman."

"Ranger wasn't responsible for Maria's death, Mal." Now Tank softened his voice and let a trace of pity ring through it.

"He didn't save her, and that's the same thing." The screeching voice that rang through the speaker grated like nails on a chalkboard.

"He couldn't. You know he tried." Tank was watching Hal who was still shaking his head in frustration.

"Fuck that. He had a choice to make, and instead of her he chose those little bastard kids. Street filth that no one gave a flying fuck about anyway." The viciousness of the response had me flinching.

"So how'd you trap him? Ranger's not a fool." I could tell Tank was trying to draw him away from what was obviously a very volatile topic.

I could hear heavy breathing through the phone. We all listened as it seemed to even off and the crazy man on the other end of the phone tried to control himself.

"That's the beauty of it, Tank, old buddy. We were waiting for his bitch. We had our guns out, waiting for the pretty little piece to come through the door and, surprise, we caught ourselves a big bad Ranger instead." I felt Lester's arm go around my waist to support me as my knees turned to water and buckled. A sale at Macy's. A fucking shoe sale at Macy's put the man I love in the hands of a psychopath. And it was supposed to be me.

"The skip." Tank said, looking over at me.

"Yep. Pretty damn clever, huh? I did a little research on that bond agency you all work for; did some research on the little woman, asked around discreetly. People do love to gossip in this town. Turns out she only does the light stuff. But, hey, what do you expect from a whimpy little bit of snatch? As I said, not Manoso's usual type." It finally occurred to me what Tank must have figured out ten steps ahead of me. Ranger was in the room. His remarks about Ranger and the filthy names he kept using to describe me, were a way for him to taunt Ranger, not Tank.

"Set one of my guys up in an apartment in Trenton, gave it a couple months and then sent him out to commit a petty theft. He had enough of a record to assure a bond, but not so high that it would go to Rangeman. Set up a trap at the address on his paperwork and waited for her to come after him. Then the bitch had to go and get herself shot, which means I've been stuck waiting in this godforsaken hole." We heard the voice start laughing.

"Then, imagine my surprise when I saw the hero here start up the sidewalk. When he came through the door we had him surrounded. There were only four of us. He might have had a chance if we hadn't had our guns out and waiting for him. It was a hell of surprise to him, too." More laughter.

"Why?" Tank asked the question, but I figured he already knew the answer.

"An eye for an eye, Pierre. I'd almost given up hope. I've waited all these years; kept my ear to the ground, had people keeping their eyes open. I almost went after her several times in the last couple years, but she kept saving herself. Every time I'd hear Carlos was staying at her place or that she was shacked up with him there at Rangeman I was ready to step in. Then before I could lay the groundwork, I'd find out she was back with that cop. It wasn't enough to kill a woman Manoso was just fucking. I had to make it count. I had to wait until I knew he was in love with her. Her death wouldn't mean shit if it didn't tear him up inside. I had to know that he'd suffer the same tortures of hell that I suffered."

I listened as his voice went from crazy to conversational. "I hear they're real close. Too bad they wasted so much time; don't you think?"

"If Ranger's dead, he isn't going to suffer."

"He'll die knowing that I'll get to his woman eventually, wondering how long she has to live. He'll die slowly, knowing that she's going to die because of him. He'll die knowing I'm going to spend some time getting to know his woman a whole lot better before I put her out of her misery." Fury crossed the faces of Tank and Hal, but I didn't care anymore what horrible things this man said. My brain was frantically searching for something I could say or do to get Ranger out of this alive.

I watched as Tank took several slow, even breaths before speaking. "What now, Mal?"

"Now you send the little bitch out, I send my guys to pick her up, and maybe we let Carlos live. We'll pass her around a little bit in front of him; let him know what it feels like to not be able to save the woman he loves. Making him watch her die might just be enough of a payback for me. Then you get your boss back and game's over." He'd kill Ranger no matter what happened. I knew it, and it shook me clear to my soul. He'd have no choice. This madman knew as well as everyone in the room that if he raped and killed me in front of Ranger, there was no place on the planet he could hide that Ranger wouldn't find him and kill him.

"No deal," was Tank's response.

"Then say goodbye to Carlos now, Tank, because I swear to you, if you don't make the deal, I'll kill him. Then I'll wait another few months and I'll snatch someone else she cares about, and we'll start all over again. I've waited this many years. A little more time isn't going to matter one way or the other to me. She's got some beautiful nieces, doesn't she? And I hear she's real good friends with that woman you've been banging. Maybe you and I will play next." I had to bite down on my lip and dig my fingernails into my palms to keep from begging him not to kill Ranger.

"Why? If you kill Ranger, why do you need Stephanie," Tank asked.

"Because Manoso's woman has to die. It has to be perfect; one woman for another." I had stood there during the whole conversation rooted to the spot by Lester's arm but tried to take a step forward when his next comments were addressed to me.

"You hear that, Babe? That's what he calls you, right? Babe? You wanna say goodbye to your man before I put a bullet in his gut?"

Tank held his hand up, telling me not to speak, as I frantically tried to think.

"On the count of three I'm done playing, Tank. One --"

"NO!" I screamed. Using all the fury and terror inside me, I broke loose from Lester and approached the speakerphone next to Tank.

"Ah, there you are, Babe. I figured you were close by. Now, have you been listening closely?"

"Yes, I heard."

"Good girl. It's nice to know Carlos has trained his bitch as well as he always did his men. Now, you're going to come to me. You're going to leave all your hardware there; your gun, your cuffs, your phone and anything else Tank there might try to slip on your body, and you're going to walk out of Rangeman alone. You're going to walk down to the end of the Haywood and stand at the corner until someone comes by to pick you up. If one vehicle or one person leaves Rangeman property other than you within 30 minutes of you being picked up, Carlos Manoso's mother is going to be grieving for her son in the morning. You got that?"

"I want to talk to him. How do I know he's alive?" I felt a desperate need to hear Ranger's voice, to know he _was_ still alive.

"This ain't no TV drama, Babe. This is real life." He sounded amused.

"I'm not leaving here until I know he's alive and that you really have him. It could be a trap."

"Babe, you wound me." I had no response to his sarcasm, and after a long pause I heard him expel a breath. "Fine, I'll put him on."

"No. No, it's too easy." Remembering what Malachi had said to Tank about being clever, I prayed to myself and bluffed.

"If you were clever enough to set this all up, you're clever enough to figure out a way to trick me. If you really have him, you'll have his phone. You dial this number from his phone. As soon as I see his number come up and I hear his voice I'll believe you, and I'll be out the door. They won't be able to stop me. You'll have what you've been wanting so bad."

I waited, holding my breath. It didn't take Hal long to figure out what I was doing. I watched as he quickly turned in his seat to the Rangeman GPS monitor and keyboard.

"All right. I don't see any problem with that, but you get 30 seconds with him. No more. You shouldn't be able to trace a call in under 30 seconds." We heard the phone disconnect.

"How long? How long do you need, Hal?" My voice was urgent.

"Fifteen. Twenty tops." The phone rang. Tank looked at the caller i.d. and looked at me, face intense.

"Go."

"Hello?"

"Yo." This time Tank's arm came around me as my knees gave out. I struggled to speak around the lump in my throat.

"Yo, yourself." I knew I'd failed to keep my voice from quivering, but at least I'd been able to speak.

"I'm okay, Steph. This wasn't your fault. You understand?"

"Yes, I understand." I was struggling not to let the tears that burned the back of my eyes fall. I desperately needed to believe what Ranger had said was true, but I didn't. In my heart I felt responsible.

"Good. Now, I want you to listen. You don't do anything this crazy fucker tells --" We all heard a thump and a grunt of pain through the line.

"Carlos --"

"Time's up, Bitch."

"You said 30 seconds, Malachi. Is that your name? You said 30 seconds. Don't worry. I'm not going to let him die. Just let me tell him I love him. Please."

I could tell that my groveling pleased him.

"I always figured Ranger was the type who would want his woman to know how to beg." I watched as Hal pumped his fist in the air. Quietly and efficiently Rangeman employees began moving around the room, silently checking their weapons, waiting for instructions from Tank.

"How long will it take for you to get someone here to pick me up," I asked, watching everyone move in around Hal to look at the monitor.

"Trying to figure out how much time the guys there have to set up an ambush, Babe?" I had the feeling he kept calling me Babe because he figured it would bother Ranger more than the vile names he had been using before. I knew that it bothered me more.

"I just don't want you to hurt him anymore. I want to be ready when they get here." I didn't have to fake the sincerity of my fear for Ranger.

"It wouldn't matter anyway. I've already got someone watching the building, and he'll be watching for 30 minutes after you're picked up. If I get one phone call from him that anyone's left, Ranger's a dead man. You got that?"

"Yes."

"Fine. Here he is. Say what you gotta say, Babe."

"Hey, Steph." I felt a tear in my heart at the thought that Ranger could no longer seem to bring himself to call me Babe.

"Hey, Carlos."

"You hanging in there?" I felt my heart break a little more this time at his unspoken 'Babe'.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Ranger?"

"Yes, mi amor."

"I love you. Please don't do anything else to make him hurt you." It took everything I had to force the words out around the tightness threatening to close my throat.

"Easy, Babe. Try to take it easy. I love you, too. I want you to promise to do as Tank says."

I never had a chance to answer Ranger as Malachi's voice came back on the line. "You've got 10 minutes to get out of your gear, out of the building and down the block to the corner, Babe. On foot. Tick tock." And the phone disconnected.

Before I drew my next breath I was tossing my gun on the desk beside me. It was quickly followed by my cuffs, phone, spray and GPS unit. I heard Hal yell out the address that he'd picked up from Ranger's cell phone.

"Tank, the bastard didn't shut down Ranger's phone. I've got a lock on it. We can monitor."

I was half way to the door when Lester's voice stopped me.

"Whoa! Wait, Steph. Where the fuck do you think you're going?" Lester started across the room.

"I don't have time for stupid questions." I turned back to the door.

"Stephanie." I turned to look at Tank. His voice hadn't been loud, but it cut through the other noise in the room.

"Don't, Tank. Don't do it. There's no choice here. He's going to kill him. We all know it. We all heard it in his voice. I have to go." I continued walking backwards toward the door.

"He wouldn't want this. Ranger wouldn't want you to do this. It will kill him to watch what this bastard will do to you. And then he'll kill you and Ranger too."

"I can live with that. But I won't live without him, and I won't let him die alone because I was too much of a coward to even try to help him. So, I suggest you figure out a way to keep both of us alive. I'll stall the bastard as long as I can. How far from here?"

"Fifteen minutes tops. Warehouse district on the north side. He must have someone in the area if he's planning on having someone here to pick you up in ten."

"Yeah, but only one's watching the building. He said 'someone' and 'he'. There's only one watching, so you better find him and find him fast. Use the security cameras to find him within the ten minutes it takes for them to pick me up, figure out a way to take him out, and keep him from making the call. Then haul your asses after us." It wasn't a request I was making. I barely noticed the quick flash of surprise on Tank's face, and I was out the door and running as fast as I could.


	23. Chapter 23

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 23 **

I ran down the stairs at a break neck speed. The chaotic thoughts that had been swirling in my head had narrowed and focused on one crystal clear thought, much like a flashlight beam that turns from wide beam to a pinpoint spot on the wall. Get to Ranger, get him out, survive. My mind seemed to stubbornly refuse to allow any other thought in. As I broke through the gate that secured the Rangeman garage, at a dead run, I tried to think about where someone might be hiding and spying on the building. But, again, my mind refused to focus on anything but getting to Ranger while he was still alive.

By the time I arrived at the corner, my heart was pounding too hard in my chest. I tried to slow my breathing and ignore the hitch in my side. It seemed to take more effort than it should have to get air. My lungs felt heavy inside my chest. I thought about what Tank and Lester had repeatedly drummed into my head about ignoring physical discomfort and tried to center on the lessons they had been giving me in the gym.

"_It's not enough to know what you have to do. You have to be focused on your goal to the point that nothing else exists. When your thoughts and emotions are frantic and you acknowledge physical pain, you cannot focus on a goal. Use your emotions, your pain and your thoughts as a tool to give yourself strength of purpose.'"_

Those words and many others like them seemed to simmer somewhere on the edges of my mind, never quite intruding enough to penetrate the mantra that had now become my only purpose; get to Ranger, get him out, survive.

As I watched the silver Ford Explorer cruise down the street toward me, my brain absorbed the black tinted windows, the out-of-state license plate; Ohio. And, as it slowed to a stop in front of me, I noticed the scratch that ran about six inches long over the front passenger side door handle. I didn't focus on the details, but I was aware of them without consciously looking for them.

When the front passenger door opened, a man angled himself out. He was approximately six feet tall. His eyes were hidden by dark sunglasses, and his body was hard and muscular to the point of disguising the area where his neck should have been. His cheek was swollen with the beginnings of ugly bruising that I prayed had come from Ranger. As his hand reached back to open the door behind his I noticed a nub where his index finger used to be. His jacket shifted enough with the movements of his body that I saw and recognized the 9 mm at his hip. Neither of us spoke as I climbed into the back and he closed the door behind me.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw the driver glance at me through the rear view mirror, but I refused to make eye contact or acknowledge him. It was hard to tell his height, but I would have said shorter than the passenger, less muscle, dull blue eyes. Here I noted a fresh bruise along the jaw line and a cut across the bridge of what appeared to be a newly broken nose, and I felt a jolt of satisfaction that Ranger didn't go without a fight.

My mind recognized the route we took as one I'd taken many times without any clear destination. It led to the old warehouse district of Trenton that was now being renovated into tract housing in order to promote a better place to live. None of the homes were occupied yet, but most were completed to the point of habitable.

I wanted to think about what Tank and the other men were doing, whether they'd found the target and removed him, if they were behind us somewhere, if they'd be on time, but my mind would not allow the questions to form. Get to Ranger, get him out, survive. With sudden conviction it occurred to me that I had finally reached the unattainable goal. I had found my zone.

** XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

When the silver Bronco came to a stop in the driveway of a mostly finished home at the end of a cul-de-sac, I waited for the passenger to open my door. When he did, I got out. I looked at the door to the home. I knew with absolutely certainty that there was a good chance once I walked through that door I'd never walk back out. For several heartbeats I felt my zone waver and begin to crumble. Oh, god, what am I doing? What if I make this worse for Ranger? What if Tank and the men can't get here in time? Who am I kidding? I'm nobody's hero. I'm Stephanie Plum, ex-lingerie buyer from the Burg. Just as I felt the panic start to control me, I heard Tank's voice in my head.

"_You can do this, Steph. Ranger has faith in you. Now concentrate, damn it. Focus on your goal. It's important for your partners to be able to trust you and count on you, and it's important for you to have total faith in them. Now, again …"_

And slowly the panic receded. Ranger was my partner in more ways than one, and he needed to be able to count on his partner. Tank and Lester and all of the Rangeman employees were my partners, and I would count on them to get there in time.

Once again I heard them in my head, _"Focus on your goal and only your goal."_

The frightened Stephanie from the Burg who screwed up when picking up her skips and rolled around in trash almost daily might have wanted to run shrieking, but the focused Stephanie that Ranger was allowing to fly wouldn't even consider it. Steeling myself for whatever might happen, refusing to believe the worse, I started to take the steps that would lead me to Ranger, once again focusing. Get to Ranger, get him out, survive.

Inside I glanced around the little clapboard house that had been all but thrown up overnight. Nothing seemed out of order. There were still exposed wooden studs and drywall laying around yet to be nailed into place. I felt a shove to my back that sent me in the direction of a hall that had three closed doors. As we got to the second door, a hand landed on my shoulder and stopped me; another reached around, slid a key in the door handle and pushed the door open.

When nudged from behind, I took a slow deep breath and stepped into the room.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I didn't see Ranger at first, my attention caught by the man standing directly in front of me. He had a face that most women would find attractive. His eyes were a soft gray, more smoke that steel. His blonde hair was thick and slightly wavy, cut above the ears. He had a body that indicated some sort of healthy regiment without the obvious muscles that rippled on Ranger. He was handsome in an inconspicuous sort of way. The man you saw pumping gas next to you at the gas station; undeniably handsome, but easily forgotten to most women.

Even as I felt eyes boring into the back of my neck, I made myself turn my attention to the man standing in the corner, arms crossed over his chest. I took in the dark skin, dark eyes and look of hatred on his face. The hatred was the only thing that got through to me. Another man that you could pass by unnoticed.

I knew I was stalling, doing whatever I could to delay looking at Ranger. I feared that once I saw him my newfound courage and focus would dissolve, embarrassing him and amusing the crazy man that now had control of both of us.

I tried to tell myself this was just another distraction job I was doing for Ranger, only this time it was my goal to distract the madman and save Ranger's life, buying time until Tank and the rest of the team could arrive.

Knowing I could stall no longer, needing to look at him, I turned my gaze to the corner of the room partly shielded by the door that had yet to be shut. Despite my best intentions, I couldn't hold back the slight moan that escaped me at my first sight of Ranger's battered face. His right eye was completely swollen shut, his cheekbone red and swollen. He had blood dripping from his nose and lip. Even as I watched, he spat blood to the floor, his head tilted forward.

Through the fury and pain of seeing Ranger's face, I became conscious of the fact that he was on the floor with his hands shackled, one on either side of him, his arms stretched out and slightly above his head. The shackles were attached to chains that were bolted to thick, sturdy studs that were meant to be a frame for the walls. His legs were stretched out in front of him, ankles bound together with gray tape.

Ranger lifted his head and looked at me. Despite the bruises and swelling, despite the blankness of his face, I could feel the fury rolling off of him in waves, and for once I didn't care. For once Ranger wasn't the one showing me how he felt about me by putting himself in danger. For once I was showing him that I valued him no less than he did me; that I would rather die than live without him. When I tipped my chin up and met his eyes with a blank look of my own, I thought, just a second, that I caught a flicker of pride in his eyes.

The harshness of the madman's voice pulled my attention from Ranger.

"Get her in here and close the door." I turned and faced the gray-eyed Malachi, shifting slightly in front of Ranger in hopes of keeping his attention focused on me. I needed time; time for Tank and the others to get here, time to come up with a plan if they didn't.

"Well, well. And here she is. Thank you for joining our little party, Babe. I'm sorry you had to miss part of the show." I watched as he barely nodded his head in Ranger's direction.

"Your hero there has never known how to respect his betters."

"Yeah," I said sarcastically while my heart raced in my chest, "It takes a really great man to beat on someone helpless. Did you have one of your buddies hold his head back for you while you punched him? Or were you able to manage that all on your own? And don't call me babe. Everyone knows only Ranger's allowed to call me babe." I nearly missed his look of fury as his fist slammed into my cheek, knocking me to the ground. I instantly rolled to my stomach and pushed to my hands and knees as I watched Ranger fight against the metal cuffs that bound his hands. I lifted my head and stared directly into Ranger's eyes, blinking back the tears that had filled them at the intense pain that radiated through my cheekbone. I continued to hold Ranger's eyes until he stopped struggling.

Returning my look, Ranger's expression changed just enough to let me know that he understood what I was doing, that there was nothing I wouldn't do to protect him. Turning my back slightly to the others, I started to stand. I dropped my guard long enough to silently beg Ranger with my eyes to go along with my bid to buy time. When I was sure he knew what I was asking, I straightened and turned toward Malachi to see a smirk of satisfaction on his face.

I nearly started in surprise at Ranger's voice. I hadn't expected him to speak. When he did, it was with a tone that bordered on boredom.

"Hey, Babe, what do you say when this mess is all over we take a vacation? We can spend a couple of days lying around the pool, drinking a couple of beers and laughing about this asshole." When Malachi took a threatening step toward Ranger, I once again shifted between them.

"Sure, lover, that sounds wonderful. We can take turns rubbing oil all over each other and talking about what a fucking nutcase he was." This time when Malachi lifted his hand I was ready. I looked him dead in the eye and gave him a look that said, go ahead, do it, and stood my ground. Instead of hitting me, he stepped forward and used his hand to rip my shirt down the front. Bracing myself not to flinch, I continued to hold his gaze.

"You know what, _Babe_, I think I'll save my anger for when I fuck you. What do you think about that?" I didn't look down as his hand grabbed my breast and he began to squeeze.

I did my best to work up a sneer, ignoring the fear and disgust rolling through my stomach.

"I think you're all talk, Mal. I think if you knew _how_ to fuck, you'd get laid more often, and you wouldn't be so uptight. And I told you not to call me that." Once again Malachi's hand came up lightening fast, backhanding me to the floor.

"Fucking whore. You think you can talk to me like that and get away with it? You feeling brave because your hero's in the room? Look again, bitch. He can't save you." I once again rolled and struggled to my knees. Once again I looked and saw Ranger's incredibly muscular biceps straining against his restraints. And again I looked him in the eye. This time I gave a little shake of my head, asking him without words not to draw attention to himself.

As I stood and turned back to Malachi, I started to pray for help to arrive. My face was on fire and I could feel the panic wanting to rise up and overtake me. I didn't know how much longer I could stall, and he was getting angrier by the second. My god, I thought, how much further could I push this maniac before he decided to kill us both.

When I turned back, Malachi looked at the two men who had escorted me into the room. They had walked over to stand next to the silent man in the corner.

"Did you search her?" Instead of the explosion I had expected at their negative response, I watched him smile.

"Good. It'll be more fun this way." He took a quick step toward me. I had no time to react as he spun me around to face Ranger. I started to struggle against his hands but pulled up short as I saw the long metal blade of a knife enter my field of vision and lower toward my throat. I heard him laugh as I went perfectly still.

"Ah, a fast learner. I like that in a woman. Would you like to know what else I like in a woman, Babe?" I didn't reply. I stood perfectly still with my eyes staring straight ahead at the wall in front of me. I acknowledged neither he nor Ranger as Malachi stripped the torn shirt from my body and cut the bra straps until my bra fell useless to the floor. I felt him step back slightly and then saw the barrel of a gun come around me and point at Ranger. I felt Malachi's breath against my ear as he moved in and spoke.

"Take off the rest of your clothes. Slowly. If you make one move I don't like, I'll put a bullet in his brain before you get a chance to make another." I could feel my bravado slipping as I reached down and did as he said. When both my pants and underwear were gone, Malachi stepped slightly to my right side.


	24. Chapter 24

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gave me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13. _

**Learning about love – Chapter 24 **

Malachi laid the gun onto the table next to him and once again raised the knife under my chin. My hands were at my side, and I felt the fingers of his left hand tangle in my hair and painfully jerk my head back. Finally I looked at Ranger. His expression was cool, and no one would have ever known that it bothered him to see the woman he swore he loved with a knife to her throat. If I didn't know better, I would have had doubts myself.

"Do you think I'll enjoy killing her any less because you have that blank, I don't give a shit look on your face, Manoso?"

"No, Mal, I don't. I think you'll enjoy killing her just like you've always enjoyed killing. All you've ever needed was some excuse to justify it in your sick, fucked-up mind."

"You're a fine one to talk about killing, my man. God knows you've got enough blood on your own hands." I watched as Ranger inclined his head acknowledging the truth of that statement.

"You're right, Mal, but I didn't go around raping and killing innocent women and children just because I could."

"Only for profit, Ranger? Always the mercenary? Well, your money isn't doing you a damn bit of good now, is it?"

"I never raped and killed innocent women and children for money either, you sick bastard."

"There are no innocents in war, Carlos. You taught me that when I watched the woman I loved, a woman who should have had nothing to do with that fucking war, die because you had to play hero and save a bunch of fucking kids. You made the wrong choice, Manoso." The hand in my hair gave a vicious tug, causing me to gasp against my will.

"When I'm done with your woman here, I'm going to let the guys here have a go. Tony over there has hated your guts since the day he met you. I bet he's gonna have a real good time with her. And when we're all done, you're going to watch me kill her slowly, just like Maria died slowly in my arms. Only you're not going to be able to hold your woman while she dies, because I'm going to put a bullet in your brain. Not much of a hero now, are you?"

"No. Don't. You said killing me would be enough." I didn't care if he needed to hear me beg. I'd say anything this lunatic wanted if it meant saving Ranger's life.

"I lied, sweet cheeks." Lowering the knife, Malachi threw me to the ground several feet away from where Ranger was chained to the wall.

"I want you to fight me, Babe, while your man watches."

I watched in horror as he tossed the knife on the table next to the gun and reached for the front of his pants. As he took one step toward me and then another, I knew I'd do whatever I had to do to make him kill me first. There was no way I was going to quietly lay there and force Ranger to watch these men rape me while he was helpless to do anything to stop it.

I pulled my knees up toward my chest in what I hoped appeared to be an attempt to cover my nakedness from his eyes. I waited until Malachi was within striking distance. Without warning I kicked my legs out with all the strength and fury inside of me, catching him on the side of his knee like Tank had taught me, rolling to the side as he came crashing down to the floor. The table beside him overturned, and I scrambled to get to the knife that landed just beyond Malachi who was screaming in pain.

The man called Tony and the two others in the room all rushed forward as Malachi writhed in pain on the floor. I watched Tony reach for the gun at his side. Suddenly chaos erupted. The door crashed open, and I saw Tank and Lester come into the room high and low, firing their guns in rapid succession toward the three men standing there. Taken off guard, they never stood a chance. I watched in horror as Tony aimed his gun and fired in Ranger's direction before he hit the floor.

I felt an arm come around my waist from behind, flipping me back just as my hand closed over the handle of the knife. Malachi had his gun in his hand and was desperately trying to use me as a shield between himself and the guns that were now pointed at him.

"You're going to have to kill her to get a shot at me, Tank. She's going to die anyway." Malachi held the gun pressed against the side of my head. My body was shielding him as he used his free arm to hold me in front of him, mere inches separating us.

"Why don't you be a real man, you fucking chicken shit, and try to kill me instead." Tank's voice never raised, never wavered, but I knew he wasn't as cool as he sounded.

"Better yet, Tank, my pal, why don't I just take out your buddy over here instead."

Knowing that Tank had to be able to see the knife that I was holding behind me, I slid my hand slowly around toward the front of my thigh, my eyes on Malachi's face as he smirked at Tank. I watched in slow motion as the maniac's hand turned the gun from me in a slow arch toward Ranger, and I slowly shifted enough to slide my hand between our bodies.

"Say goodbye to your man, Babe," I heard Malachi whisper.

I heard Tank say, "I don't think so, Mal. You lose," an instant before I slid the knife into the stomach of the man holding me and pushed up with all my strength.

"I told you not to call me babe, asshole," I whispered back as I stared into the shocked horror on Malachi Lawrence's face.

Immediately I felt strong arms lifting me from behind as I saw the light fade from the eyes that suddenly danced in front of my face. Someone was talking to me, and I felt something wrap around my naked body, attempting to cover me. I was staring down at the blood on my hand and arm and down the front of me. I felt a hand firmly grab my chin and force my eyes up and away from the image in front of me and another was pulling the shirt together in the front.

"Steph, look at me. Look at me, Stephanie." I heard Tank's voice, but it sounded far away. Suddenly he gave me a little shake.

"I said look at me." When my eyes were finally focused on Tank's face, I watched in amazement as he started to smile.

"You did good. You hear me, woman? You did what you had to do, and you got the job done. Don't you go fainting on us now."

"Ranger? Oh, god, Ranger." I yanked myself away from Tank and fell to my knees in front of Ranger just as Bobby and Lester were releasing the shackles that had held him captive.

I whimpered at Ranger's bruised and bloody wrists as his arms came around me. His face, close to mine, was swollen and already turning from red to an ugly purple.

"Shhh, Babe, it's all right. I'm fine." I threw my arms around Ranger's neck and buried my face against his chest, dissolving into tears. The shirt that had been tossed around me was totally forgotten until I felt Ranger slide it up and over my shoulders. I sat there for a few minutes shaking, the tears flowing down my face onto the front of Ranger's shirt that had been ripped and torn open.

I shifted in Ranger's arms so that I could lean up and gently put my lips to his. I felt his sharp intake of breath, the jerking of his body. Looking down I noticed blood flowing bright and free from his thigh and through the hole in his pants caused by a bullet. Pulling back so fast that I would have toppled over if not for the strong arms that held me, I finally let panic take hold.

"Oh, god, Ranger, you've been shot." I tugged myself away and looked over at Tank.

"Do something," I demanded, fighting off the hysteria that wanted to cloud my brain now that the threat was over.

"We already are, Steph. An ambulance is on the way." I barely heard his words before I turned back to Ranger. I was frightened by the amount of blood that was rapidly saturating the front of his cargo pants. Before I could panic any further, Ranger's voice drew my attention.

"I'm going to beat your ass." I was shocked by Ranger's hoarse statement.

"W-w-what?" I stammered out, feeling like nothing was making sense.

"If marriage isn't the answer, maybe beating you will make sure you never pull another stupid stunt like this again. After all, Babe, a good spanking always does the trick." I sucked in a breath at Ranger's slurred words as I heard a chuckle behind me.

"Ranger?" I watched as his eyes took on an unfocused sheen.

"Yeah, Steph. I'm okay. The wound isn't life threatening. I don't even think it hit bone. Took a hell of a chunk out of the muscle though. I'm losing a lot of blood. It's making things a little gray." Feeling a moment's relief at Ranger's words, my brain finally absorbed his comment about spanking me, and amazingly I found myself smiling at him.

I reached up and gently traced my fingers over the bruising on Ranger's cheek and around his eye as his eyes drifted closed.

"I love you."

"Love you too, Babe." I nearly fell backwards as Ranger slumped against me, but I felt two sets of hands steady me from behind. I looked back to find Tank and Joe kneeling behind me.

Tank shifted me to the side. He had a hand on Ranger's shoulder, and I watched as he eased him back until he was laying flat on the floor. Joe wrapped his hands around my upper arms and helped me to my feet, guiding me out of the way to make a path for the paramedics and other police officers that had entered the room. I sucked in my breath as they opened Ranger's shirt and I saw the discoloration around his ribs.

Tank walked over to where Joe and I were standing. I watched as some silent communication passed between the two men that I didn't understand. Suddenly Joe released me, and Tank put his arm around my shoulders, leading me from the room and to the black SUV waiting outside.


	25. Chapter 25

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gives me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 25**

I was in the hospital waiting room dressed in clean jeans and a clean t-shirt. Tank had called Cal and told him to get some clothes for me from Ella and to bring them to the hospital. He then convinced one of the nurses to find me an empty room so that I could use the shower and wash off all of Malachi's blood from my body. Tank had also intimidated one of the doctors into looking at my cheek where I'd been hit. The doctor had assured him that nothing was broken but that I could look forward to a pretty impressive black eye.

Tank sat calmly while I paced back and forth. I couldn't seem to get my mind to accept that Ranger was going to be fine, and I knew I wouldn't be convinced until I saw him. Frustrated that time seemed to be crawling, I spun around to Tank.

"Who was he?" I didn't have to say any more for Tank to understand.

"He was in the Forces with us. Our unit was assigned to secure and police an army hospital in a little third world country most people have never heard of and you won't find on your average map. The encampment was little more than several tents set up around a compound; one was a makeshift hospital for wounded soldiers, the other two were dormitories of sorts for the medical staff and a group of orphaned kids. Most of their parents had been killed in the war. We'd been posted there for about three months, and Malachi fell for one of the army nurses. Her name was Maria. She was a cute little thing. A bit on the shy side. None of us knew what she saw in Malachi, but I guess he wasn't so bad before she was killed. We all knew he was a man on the edge, but she seemed to level that off in him somehow." Tank's eyes took on a far away look as if he was remembering the past.

"Ranger, Lester and I, along with a unit of men, had been out on patrol for about 72 hours. We'd gotten word that the enemy had managed to slip someone inside to plant bombs throughout the encampment. Ranger was furious. There were more children, wounded men and medical personnel in that camp than there were soldiers, and the enemy had to know. Of course, there are all types of cultures out there where they truly believe there are no innocents in their fight to win a war, and killing the helpless makes as much of a statement to them as killing an entire squadron of soldiers. It doesn't matter that the government doesn't call it a war. There are always situations like this one cropping up in third world countries that the government prefers to call conflicts or political uprisings. The politicians know the word 'war' isn't good for their public image, so they label it differently and downplay the importance of it." The bitterness in Tank's voice sent a cold chill racing through me. I stood transfixed by his story, not even sure if he remembered I was standing there.

"Ranger gave orders for us to head back. We were only a couple hundred yards from the encampment when we heard the explosions and the screams. We ran full out, trying to get there as fast as we could. It was nighttime. The flames from the explosions gave just enough light that we could see the children running around frantically trying to find cover. There were two tents still standing when we got there; one was the tent where the kids slept and the other housed the wounded soldiers. Ranger motioned for Lester and me to get the children who were running around to safety. He raced toward one of the tents. There were still kids in it, and Ranger knew it. You could see them through the open flaps, on the ground huddled in fear." Tank got up and walked over to pour himself a cup of stale coffee they always have in hospital waiting rooms. I watched as he downed it like a shot of Jack Daniels. When he turned back to me, there was a dangerous look in his eyes.

"Lester and I did what Ranger ordered without question. We didn't know if the enemy would be waiting in the shadows to start picking people off one by one with their weapons. I looked over and saw Ranger come running out of the tent with something in his hand. Twenty seconds after I saw him heave it into the woods it exploded. By then he was sprinting toward the other tent. When he was about 40 yards away, the other tent blew up. The explosion sent Ranger sprawling to the ground. Somehow he managed to get up and limp toward the tent anyway. It was useless, and he knew it, but he still tried to fight his way through the flames to look for survivors. He finally collapsed from his injuries by the time Lester and I had gotten to him. He was bloody and bruised and unconscious. Ranger got the Medal of Honor and a purple heart from the United States Government even though they refused to acknowledge publicly that anything had happened. Six months later he walked away from the Special Forces."

Tank and I sat in silence for a long time. I could hear the ticking of the clock on the wall. It seemed extraordinarily loud. Finally I broke the silence.

"Maria was in the other tent." It wasn't a question.

"Yeah, Maria, three other nurses and two doctors were still inside trying to help the remaining wounded soldiers to safety. Malachi and his unit showed up minutes after the tent exploded. I watched as he ran through the flames like a madman. Maria was already dead when Mal carried her out, but he kept insisting that someone try to save her. They finally managed to pry him away from her. I watched as he listened to one of the men as he explained to him what had happened. When Malachi had heard enough, he walked over to where Ranger was lying on the ground being worked on by the medics. The fucking asshole pushed one of the medics out of the way and then he kicked Ranger in the ribs while he laid there unconscious. I was court marshaled for assaulting an officer. If they hadn't pulled me off of him when they did, I would have been court marshaled for killing an officer. The charges were eventually dropped after the witnesses came forward and told their version of the night's events. Then I walked away, too, with an honorable discharge. Carlos and I have been together ever since." Tank took a deep breath and slowly released it.

"After we got out, we heard rumors from time to time. Malachi started getting a reputation for raping and murdering women and children that he was assigned to protect. Every now and then we'd hear that he was spouting off about how he was going to get even with Ranger for 'killing' his woman. The fucking coward never had the nerve to confront Ranger face to face. The last we'd heard the army had given him a dishonorable discharge over some mess he'd created at a refugee camp in Cambodia and he'd gone underground. As far as I know this is the first time he's poked his head out of his hole." Refusing to let myself think that because of me it would be the last, I concentrated on my concern for Ranger.

Ten or fifteen minutes passed with neither of us breaking the silence. I looked over at Tank. Now that he had finished his story, an eerie calm seemed to have settled over him, and he'd gone into his zone. Suddenly I couldn't stand the quiet any longer. I got up and started to pace the small waiting room again.

"Tank, he was beaten so badly." I hadn't been able to hide the near panic in my voice.

"He's been beaten worse." I couldn't believe what I'd heard.

"He was losing a lot of blood." My voice had risen an octave.

"So they'll give him more." I just stared at Tank's calm reply.

"_He was nearly unconscious," _I said, my voice almost a shriek.

"Yeah, that tends to happen sometimes when you've been beaten and shot and you lose a lot of blood." I took a deep steady breath and decided to try again in a more reasonable tone.

"Tank, they said he was starting to go into shock." Thinking I'd done an admirable job of sounding calm, I nearly keeled over at his response.

"Probably afraid you'd actually want to use those tickets he had me get him for Vegas and take him up on his offer to marry him. I know that would send me into shock."

"You bought the tickets to Vegas?" I stood there stunned.

"Hey, I thought he was serious. Lord knows you make him nuts. I figured he'd finally snapped."

I have no idea what I intended to do, but I took a threatening step toward Tank. Before I could go any further, a doctor came into the waiting room.

"Miss Plum, it's good to see you again. The last time I saw you, you were on my table, and I was removing a bullet from your shoulder. How's it feeling?"

"Good. It feels good. Did you operate on Carlos Manoso?"

"Yes, I did. Mr. Manoso's going to be fine. It wasn't a difficult procedure. Basically I just sewed him up. I won't tell you it wasn't a serious wound, because in my opinion every gunshot wound is serious. The bullet missed the bone and went straight through, but it managed to tear through a chunk of muscle, which isn't surprising considering the amount of muscle on Mr. Manoso's body. He'll need to change the dressing and stay off of it as much as possible, over the next few days anyway. I'd suggest staying off of it all together to keep from pulling the stitches, but after talking to Mr. Manoso, I have a feeling he's going to do what he wants."

I gave a watery laugh, "He usually does."

"I figured as much. Just do your best to keep him from any heavy activities for the next week or so. He can have the stitches removed in a week to ten days, but it will take a while longer for the muscle to completely heal."

"Thank you, Doctor." I felt Tank's hand at my arm as my knees wanted to buckle. 

"As for his other injuries, his ribs are pretty bruised, but we didn't find any noticeable cracks or breaks. His face was pretty swollen, but only his nose was broken. He said it wasn't the first time, and he refused to let us set it. According to Mr. Manoso he took some blows to the abdominal area, so we did some tests on that area as well but didn't find any internal damage or bleeding. Any normal man in what I would consider good physical condition would probably have been a mess after taking that kind of beating. As you are no doubt aware, Mr. Manoso's body is in unusually excellent condition, and the amount of muscle mass on his body allowed him to sustain the blows without any serious injury. On the other hand, he should expect to be in a lot of pain over the next few days. Try to get him to take it easy if you can."

"We will. Thank you again, Doctor," Tank said as he held out his hand to the surgeon.

"You're welcome. If you want to wait here, I'll send a nurse to get you and take you back to see him. We only allow one at a time."

Less than five minutes later a nurse came into the room. Tank motioned for me to go ahead. I had my hands clenched together so tightly my knuckles were turning white. The minute I walked over to the side of the hospital bed Ranger opened his eyes and looked at me.

"Yo," I said, trying to smile at Ranger when all I wanted to do was lay my head on his chest and weep.

"Babe." Instantly my body went on alert. Ranger's eyes and voice were blank as he looked at me.

"How are you feeling?"

"Like I've been beaten and shot," Ranger answered quietly. I looked into his eyes willing him to show some sort of emotion, anything to tell me what he was feeling.

"Do you need anything?" I walked forward and laid my hand over his.

Ranger's hand squeezed mine briefly before he pulled it away. "I need to talk to Tank."

"He's in the waiting room. He knew I needed to see you, to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine, Steph."

And suddenly it was all too much; hearing that Ranger had hit his panic button, the phone call from Malachi, seeing Ranger chained up and helpless, the fear that we were both going to die, listening to Tank's tragic story while waiting and worrying about Ranger's condition. I knew if I didn't get out of there immediately I was going to fall apart. Without another word I spun on my heel and walked out of the room. Tank threw me a shocked look as I stormed past him without breaking stride.

"Ranger wants to see you. I'll call for a ride." I never looked back, completely ignoring Tank's command to wait for him.


	26. Chapter 26

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gave me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

**Learning about love – Chapter 26**

**_Ranger's POV _**

I didn't look up as Tank walked through the door, but I could feel his eyes boring into me. We hadn't spoken since he told me that Steph had left the hospital. I hadn't been up to the apartment. As soon as Tank and I got back to Rangeman, I used the crutches the hospital had given me and came straight to my office. Hal walked over and informed us that Steph had gotten back a little while ago and had gone upstairs without stopping by the comp room. Apparently she'd gotten a ride from her father.

"Shouldn't you be upstairs in bed letting Steph hover over you instead of being down here in your office? You look half dead, man. Go home."

"Mind your own business, Tank."

"Why are you so pissed at her?"

"I'm not pissed at her, but she's reckless, and she damn near got herself killed." I didn't tell him how my mouth had gone dry in fear as Stephanie had walked in and faced Malachi.

"Her recklessness saved your ass."

"It wasn't her place," I snarled at him.

"The hell you say. She's part of this team and the only thing that bastard would bargain for." Tank was the only man I knew who I couldn't intimidate.

"Not anymore." I couldn't take that risk again.

"What are you saying?" I ignored the soft warning in Tank's voice.

"There's no room for recklessness on this team. She can go back to doing searches in the office."

"Ranger, you better think about what you're saying. You're going to lose her if you hold on too tightly."

"I know what I'm doing," I insisted.

"You don't have a clue what you're doing."

"Fuck you, Tank." Tank didn't appear the least bit phased.

"Ranger -- Carlos, you've got it all wrong. Steph didn't run out of here recklessly. She ran out of her as cool as anyone on this team, shouting orders on her way out the door." I couldn't let myself think about what Steph had been feeling as she ran out of Rangeman knowing what Malachi had planned for her when he got his hands on her.

When I just looked out the window, Tank spoke again.

"Man, why aren't you proud of her? A year ago we would have been sitting around here afterwards talking about her amazing instincts and sheer guts. You would have been proud as hell of her."

"It's different now, Tank. Completely different."

"Yeah. Yeah, it is. Now she's yours. This time she didn't go home with Morelli. She came home with you. So why aren't you upstairs thanking her for saving your life and telling her how proud she makes you? You should be talking her into that trip to Las Vegas."

When I didn't answer, Tank went on.

"You know what the problem is? You're used to being in control. Today, when you were chained to that wall and Steph came strolling into that room, you weren't in control. For once she was the one in control of the situation, and you can't handle it." Insulted, I spun away from the window and glared at him.

"What the hell are you saying? You think I'm trying to control her life?" The conversation was coming perilously close to the one I'd had with Steph just a couple nights ago, and I didn't like it one bit.

"Fuck. Man, you try to control everything around you. We both do. Hell, most people do. No one likes feeling like they don't have control of what's happening around them. Control your environment, control your emotions, control the outcome of the battle. You and I both learned that by the same teachers, Carlos. It's the way we were trained. You've always tried to control exactly how deep into danger or trouble Stephanie would get into and then you'd ride in to save the day. That's the only reason you went after that skip today. You had bad vibes, and you did it because you were trying to save her. Well, this time she did the riding and she did the saving, and you can't handle it." I just stood there staring at Tank, surprised by the things he was saying. He wasn't done yet.

"The worst part is you're letting that piece of shit Malachi Lawrence ruin the best thing that's ever happened to you, and you don't even see it. He didn't have to kill either one of you if you're going to let him take her away from you anyway. Seems to me you're letting him get the job done after all."

"Fuck you."

"Yeah, yeah. I heard you the first time. Look, that woman upstairs -- your woman -- took a man's life today in the most up-close and personal way you can. She did it to save your life. She felt his blood spill out on her hands and got a close up look at his eyes as the life drained out of him. She's not us, Ranger, and she's struggling with that. So why the hell aren't you up there thanking her for saving your worthless hide and letting her know how grateful you are instead of making her torture herself with guilt? Why the hell are you dumping even more shit on her when you should both be celebrating the fact you're alive? Man, you have a lot to learn about love."

I nearly staggered under the weight of Tank's words as the truth hit me like a sledgehammer. He was right. I had a lot to learn about love. Fortunately for me, I'm a fast learner. I just hoped it wasn't too late for me to prove it.

I was almost to the door when I stopped. "She scared the shit out of me, Tank."

"And you're not used to being scared. It shook you."

"Yeah. Once it was over with, I could feel my insides turn to jelly. Christ, the things he could have done to her."

"Yeah, well he didn't, and you're both still alive thanks to her. Now, what are you going to do about it?" I didn't have an answer. The only thing I knew for certain was what I wasn't going to do. I wasn't going to let my fear and stupidity push her away.

Opening the door, I threw one last parting comment behind me.

"You know, Tank, you're turning into quite the little relationship expert. Some would even say you're becoming domesticated. Maybe you ought to be the one taking Lula to Vegas to get married."

As the door shut behind me, I heard Tank's insulted, "Fuck you, Ranger," and smiled on the way to the elevator.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

I walked quietly into the apartment on the seventh floor. I took in the look on Steph's face as she stared out into the night. She looked dejected, and I felt a moment's pang of guilt that I had been the one to put that look on her face.

I leaned the crutches against the couch and ignored the pain in my leg as I walked up behind her. I tried to ignore the vicious tear through my heart when I saw her stiffen and tense. When had I become such a jackass, I wondered. How could I have fucked up so badly with her that she no longer turned eagerly into my arms? I was so engrossed in my thoughts that I almost didn't register Steph's quiet words.

"If you're waiting for an apology for what I did today, you won't get one. And if you're here to offer me an apology for the way you acted at the hospital, I don't want one."

Wrestling with indecision, I finally placed my hand gently at the back of her neck and stepped into her, molding my body against hers. After the initial jerk of her body, which caused another painful tear, I patiently waited and was relieved when her body betrayed her mind and she began to melt against me.

I didn't regret using her body's response to my advantage, not when my own betrayed me every time she was near. Besides, I was feeling desperate enough to use any advantage I had. Tank was right, I should have grabbed a hold of her in the hospital and never let go. I should have been comforting her and telling her how proud she'd made me.

I softly slid her hair away from the back of her neck and placed a long gentle kiss at the nape, moving my mouth up and down slowly. I felt the familiar thrill of electricity that ran through my body when she shivered at my caress, and was grateful for it.

Taking a chance, I slid my arms around her from behind and moved my mouth to the soft shell of her ear.

"I am sorry, Babe. I'm sorry that I hurt you. I'm sorry that I put your life at risk, so damned sorry that I didn't even take time to thank you for saving mine or to tell you how proud you made me." As the tears that she'd held in began to fall and her body began to shake with suppressed emotions, it took all my will not to turn her and crush her to me. I knew she needed more time, and it was killing me to give it to her. But I also knew it had to be her choice. Her decision.

I waited patiently as she dissolved into soft little sobs, letting her pain wash through me and mix with my own. That I could have hurt her so bad was one more regret that I knew I'd live with for a long time. I figured it was no less than I deserved.

After what seemed like an eternity, Steph's sobs quieted and still she hadn't turned to me, nor had she in any way made any attempt to return my embrace. For the first time in ten years I admitted to myself that the feelings taking life inside of me were the greasy licks of panic. When she'd walked into that house today to face her own death, I had felt helplessness and fury as I'd never felt it before, but only the thought of losing her now had brought on the panic.

I wanted to break the silence, but I had no idea what to say, no words to explain to her how it had felt being chained up and completely powerless while Malachi had struck her and humiliated her by forcing her to remove her clothes as he had. How could I tell her of the terror I felt as he held that wicked blade to her throat? And when it was over all I could think about was how I'd placed her in danger. So instead of taking her in my arms at the hospital and holding on tight, I'd tried to put some distance between us. I stood there thinking that I didn't deserve her, and I couldn't help wondering if she was thinking the same thing. I held her there in the silence, waiting for her judgment.

I knew that I would abide by whatever decision Steph made, but I wanted to demand her forgiveness. I wanted to carry her to our bed and make love to her in every way I knew in order to reach her on the one level I was still sure of. And I knew I couldn't do it -- wouldn't do it to her.

Just when I was about to tell her that I'd let her go, I felt her soft hands reach up and cover mine that were wrapped around her waist. I held my breath, waiting for her to push my arms away. When she pulled them harder around her body instead, the panic began to recede.

"Te amo, Bebe. Perdonarme, mi amor. (_I love you, Babe. Forgive me, my love_)." I knew she couldn't have understood anything more than the words I love you and Babe, but I watched as a soft smile played at the corners of her mouth. Reminding myself to speak my heart to her in the language of my family more often in the future, I silently prayed that the small smile meant we'd still have one.

"Will you look at me, Babe? Will you turn around now?" Steph paused for a second. When she finally turned around, she looked me dead in the eye.

"Sometimes you're a real ass, you know that?" I stared at her in shock for a few seconds and then threw my head back and laughed in relief. I pulled her against me, wrapped my arms tightly around her and buried my face in her hair.

"I know I am." I finally gave in and pulled back, taking her mouth in a slow, deep kiss. When I heard her soft moan and felt her body start to melt against mine, I lifted my head and looked into her beautiful blue eyes.

"I love you, Babe."

"I love you too, Ranger. God knows why, but I do." I was still smiling as my mouth covered hers once again.


	27. Epilogue

_A/N: Again, thank you to everyone who took time to review. It's the only thing that gave me the courage to continue this story._

_A special thank you to the incredibly talented Kate Manoso for her help, encouragement and most of all her talent and wicked sense of humor. _

_Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I borrowed them from the amazing J.E. to have a little fun._

_Warnings: Sexual content, Language, Angst and Spoilers for all 13._

_A/N: As we come to the end of my story, I want to again thank those of you who took the time to read my story and review it. Part of me is relieved to be done with it, and part of me is sad, but I enjoyed the ride, and I hope you did too._

**Learning about love - Epilogue**

_**Steph's POV**_

"What's wrong with us?" I wasn't able to keep the worry completely out of my voice.

"Nothing's wrong with us."

"Ranger, we flew all the way to Las Vegas to get married, and neither one of us could go through with it. Everyone I know gets married. Why can't we just do this?" My voice had risen an octave higher.

Taking me in his arms, Ranger looked at my face closely. "There's them and then there's us, Babe, and we're just not ready to be them yet. That doesn't mean there's anything wrong with us."

"What if I'm never ready?"

"You will be."

"But what if I'm not?" Ranger let out a little sigh. I was being a pain in his ass again.

"Then we won't ever get married."

"So you'd just let me go whenever I wanted," I asked perversely. Here I am, one part of me unwilling to get married and the other part wanting assurance that Ranger and I have a commitment.

"No. Never." I felt a little thrill at his forceful denial. I started thinking maybe I needed psychological help. Seeing the frown on my face, Ranger misunderstood.

"It's a piece of paper, Babe. I have multiple other identities when I need them, and all the i.d. and documentation I need to back them up. In under 30 minutes I could have delivered to this suite 15 pieces of paper identifying us as Mr. and Mrs. Ricardo Carlos Manoso, and no one would ever question the authenticity of them." I looked at him wondering if that would work and then gave myself a mental slap to the forehead.

"Tank and Lula are a '_them' _now," I said.

Ranger gave me his best 200-watt smile. "We'll have to pick out something special for a wedding present."

I smiled back at Ranger and then turned serious. "Do you think you'll ever be ready to be a '_them'_?

Equally serious, Ranger answered. "I think so. I hope so. Some day I'd love to have a little blue-eyed girl who jumps off roofs trying to fly."

"You would?" I was surprised. I'd never seriously thought of Ranger wanting another little girl.

"Sure. It could be fun." Not for the first time I thought Ranger had an odd idea of fun.

"But not today." It wasn't a question, and I said the words with a trace of relief in my voice. I really wasn't ready to be a Valerie and do what was expected of me. One of the reasons I'd fallen in love with Ranger was his ability to always be himself and make no apologies for it. The fact that he expected no less than the same from me just made me love him even more.

"Not today," Ranger agreed, pulling me tightly against his body. The relief was just as clearly obvious in his voice. Ranger hadn't had enough time to get his life and his business in the place he wanted them to be before taking on a wife and a family.

"What about you, Babe? Honestly. You think you'll ever be ready to be a '_them'_?

"Maybe. After all, I've gotten you to talk about your feelings, I've met your family, and I've even got you whistling show tunes. Anything's possible." At the look on Ranger's face, I started laughing and then I let out a shriek as he bent down, threw me over his shoulder and started toward the bedroom.

I was still laughing as Ranger tossed me on the bed and started stripping off his clothes.

"We're going to have to tell everyone we didn't get married, Ranger."

"We'll get married tomorrow, maybe," Ranger said with a laugh, joining me on the bed. I knew he wasn't serious, and that was just fine with me. Right now I was just going to enjoy being Ranger's woman and all the wonderful perks that came along with it.

_A/N: And I hope you all enjoyed my story. My best to all of you and those you love. __Please, please, please take time to review the story and let me know what you thought of it._

_Linda_


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